28-12-2009 - Waiting...

My mood while writing this blog: chomping at the bit

This two week wait stuff is hard! Chat and I were planning on waiting til March to start TTC, but we went ahead and ‘practiced’ this month and the timing was right, so now I am just waiting to see if his little swimmer caught the train or what! I am only 8 dpo, so I am not going to waste a test and see the BFN, knowing that it’s highly HIGHLY unlikely that I will get a BFP this soon. Waiting is no fun! I think I am convincing myself that I have these ‘symptoms’ when who knows, maybe I am just feeling things because I am hoping to feel them. One thing for sure that I am NOT feeling that I did with my first pregnancy – I feel NO bb tenderness at all. They feel just like they always do. I know that every pregnancy can be different, so I am not getting disappointed just because they aren’t sore. I am doing my best to try not to link every little feeling to “oh, this could be a symptom!’. I have three more days to go before I test. AGH! I am going to go crazy before then. I am hungry more often – maybe I am just more hungry. I wanted eggs (I don’t really like eggs) and I REALLY wanted a burrito with rice and all of that – REALLY wanted it – okay, so maybe I am just really in the mood to eat, doesn’t mean that I am craving foods. I found the smell of sausage to be pretty disgusting – but then again, I don’t like sausage, doesn’t mean I have some super smell sense going on. I feel kind of full and crampy in the lower abdomen – but maybe it’s from doing the BD, doesn’t mean anything is going on down there. I’ve had some astonishingly real life like dreams – but maybe I am just really tired when I go to sleep. I would love my BFP, but really I think because I want to see two lines this much, I could be interpreting everything as a pregnancy symptom. GAH! I don’t know how I am going to get through these next days without going crazy – but I am really going to try and wait it out until New Year’s and see what I get. Wish me luck!