18-11-2009 - memory of marian

My mood while writing this blog: mournful

I have been a palliative Nurse for 14 months now and I have looked after marian from day 1. She was a 6 St lady who didnt talk and lived on baby food. I got placed with her with 3 sitting calls a week from 8am -2pm..

Soon, I discovered a different person to what every1 had wrote on her care plan. This lady had a personality! After several months, I had made such a good relationship with her. I got her talking again and got her eating propper food. I arranged for her to start coming out of bed (she was bed bound due to parkinsons and falling over with several broken bones) I arrange for a hoist to be put in place so she could sit with her husband in the livingroom. I would put makeup on her and bought her clothes so she could be dressed in the day instead of wearing night clothes 24/7. she would often play with my hair and we would sing together. I got her making animal noises and id sing to hr and make her chuckle

2 weeks ago marian became very ill with a chest infection. She stopped drinking and eating and was sleeping contantly. She was in alot of pain and distressed. I spoke to the D/N about her "End of life" drugs which is basically a cocktail of morphine and other pain numbing meds. We decided to wait a while and just made her as comfy as possible.

As I arrived today after a cple of days off I was greeted with 4-5 cars which were family and the other nurse running in to the house. Obviously My heart went in my mouth..So i sheepishly walked in. Marian hadnt passed on but she was very ill. We decided to administer her End of life drugs. I sat with the family all day talking about marian when she was younger and celebrating and remembering what a lovely lady marian was and what a good life she had. She had a loving family and loving husband. She was very VERY popular lady and will be sadly missed by soo many friends family and other carers that have built up a loving relationship with her. Our seniors from the office were in and out to say their goodbyes. Once the end of life drugs were in place, the pain she had looked in before that was in her eyes had slipped away. She looked out of it granted but she looked so so peaceful and at rest As I left I kissed her and told her I loved her and to go find George (Who is her husband who has recently passed on)

I am supposed to be there tomorrow but I dont think she is going to last the night. So, as far as I am concerned I have said my last goodbyes now and hope she will be looking down on us all when we attend her funeral.

You were one special lady marian and have touched the hearts of many many people throughout your life. And I loved being a part of your life even if it was towards the end.