23-4-2009 - Rambling and 18 Month Well Baby Check-Up

My mood while writing this blog: Content

I apologize in advance, this blog became longer then I had intended. I’m feeling lonely and like a single mom, my husband has been working long hours installing a new server for his company and preparing for the launch of his long awaited intronet site. I know I shouldn’t complain he’s working for a company that is expanding and probably one of the few that gave out bonuses this year, the down side about his long hours is he’s salary.

I’m not 100% positive, I think I felt the baby move for the first time yesterday, having “experience” I though I’d know for sure when I felt the first little quake to recognize it as movement, but movement is always kind of iffy in the beginning until it becomes stronger and more regular. Being pregnant is finally sinking in and I no longer have to remind myself that I’m expecting, for some reason it didn’t hit me as quickly this time around, I think a lot of that has to do with the fact that my son keeps me pretty well occupied and plus the fear of how I could possible have as much love for another child as I do for my son. This might sound weird but it’s really helped that a friend from high school gave birth to a son earlier this week; it made me realize how excited I am for my little one, I know that with my husbands help that we’ll over come the challenges that a second child will bring and I know that my love for my son won’t lessen but my heart will grow and I’ll have just as much love for the new baby.

I have to admit, I’m not one of those women that loves being pregnant, it has its obvious perks like movement, hiccups, ultrasounds, etc. but I don’t enjoy the mood swings, watching what I eat/drink, not having any desire what so ever to be intimate with my husband (seriously, if you’re one of those mythical women that is sex crazed while pregnant, PLEASE leave me a message, I have yet to meet one of you), pregnant brain, asking for help and limitations. Don’t get me wrong I’m incredible blessed and I desperately wanted this child growing within, but for me the pure joy and excitement starts the moment my child enters the world. I think this time around in some respects it’ll be easier since I know what to expect (obviously there will be differences between this baby and my son), I'll better understanding how to handle the baby blues, what to do and how to handle myself in stressful situations (walking away is okay, I now understand that and don’t feel guilty) and not to take anything for granted or try and rush my child to grow up.

I talk a lot about my pregnancy but I don’t want to forget my number one, I tell my DS that he’ll always be my number one (meaning first born) and nothing can ever change that. My Son had his 18 month check up last Saturday, everything is fine and dandy with Benjamin, we’re suppose to cut back on the miracle grow we’re feeding him (this is a joke of course), he’s a towering 35” (I’m fearing his size 2 year old summer clothes won’t fit him and we’ll be moving into 3 year clothes sooner then expected) and a whopping 29lbs, four pounds over my weight limit and I joke with Ben that I’m going to have to put him on the Slim Fast diet. He received only one shot this time and he handled it like a champ, no tears! We estimate he’s saying 10-15 words, the doctor said that’s average, he’s starting to put words together “no mama”, “stop dog”, “go dog”. He’ knows certain animals (mostly everything is a dog) and body parts (LOVES showing off his belly), he’s become the little communicator either bringing us what he wants or pointing to it and if all else fails he’s more then willing to cry/scream for it. Thankfully we just finished a round of teething and I ‘m keeping my fingers crossed that the mean, nasty teething monster stays away for a month or two. I can’t believe how much my baby boy has changed in the last few weeks, it’s truly amazing, he’s discovered the wonderful world of books, he brings us books and is now more then willing to sit and listen to us read…I can’t tell you how long I’ve been waiting for that to happen!!!! The thing I love the most that he started doing is hugging, after he wakes up from his nap he’ll run up to me and give me a GIANT hug and when I lie him down for a nap or bed time he reaches up with both hands to be hugged…it melts my heart every time.

I’m trying to prepare him as best as I can for the arrival of his sibling in 6 months but exactly how can you explain there is a baby in mommy’s belly to an 18 month old…seriously, suggestions are welcome! I took him to a play area yesterday, there was a surprising large amount of babies, Benjamin was fascinated by them and there was one mother in particular that was very friendly, I explained I was pregnant and asked if she’d mind if my son could approach her three month old. She was fine with it, sat down on the ground with the baby and Benjamin crawled right into her lap, started gently touching the baby and leaned in as if he was going to kiss the little guy. There was another baby that Benjamin ran up to and gave a hug too, I’m really hoping today is a good sign and he’s going to be just as carrying, gentle and loving with his own sibling.

We enrolled Benjamin in Aqua Tots (an infant pool class), he begins on June 6^th and it runs for eight weeks. We were also given free passes to a nearby amusement park, I’m looking forward to that since it’s designed for kids and hopefully majority of the rides I’ll be able to go on being pregnant.