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phonics
	Age: 29 Country: US Province/region: City: Atlanta Partner: Husband - Rod Children: Yes, 2 Pregnant: Not anymore Occupation: I.T. Technician
	Online: More than 3 months ago Last updated: 690 days ago. Member since: 1389 days
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08-11-2009 - Advice and opinions needed

My mood while writing this blog:
Upset

OK. So tell me how do you approach thi situation. We have my step daughter who is about to turn 5 years old in in two months. We have a 16 month old daughter. Taylor (the 5 year old) pushed Raegan (the 16 month old) because Raegan was trying to play with her and would not leave her alone. Rod thinks that is OK. I think there is NO reason that it is OK for a 5 year old to pus ha 1 year old. I told him I felt like if Raegan is messing with her nad will not listen then she needs to come and tell us. Not take it upon herself to push her. She has already shown that she does not understand the difference in when it is ok to do something and when it is not.

Earlier this morning Rod told her that if she is playing with something and Raegan is trying to take it to tell her no and to stop. Also if she does not want Raegan to play with somethingshe is playing with to not let her take it from her. So Taylor took this to mean she could hide her toy from Raegan even if she was not playing with them at the time. She tiok this to mean that she could tell Raegan what to do whhenever and that she could yell at her like she was her child. So I brought this to Rod's attention and told him we needed to be mindful of how we explained things to her ecause she does not understand the difference.

Yet he thinks that since Raegan does things to Taylor that it is OK for Taylor to do it back. Well Raegan is 1 and does not know better. Taylor is 5 and knows better. ZTaylor can hurt Raegan worse than Raegan can hurt Taylor. So right now we are at an impass. I told him whenever i catch it Taylor is getting into trouble because that is NOT OK. I will nder no circumstances allow Taylor to think it is OK to push her sister for any reason. Now mind you Raegan needs to learn than if Taylor does not want to play then she needs to leave her alone, but that is still nto a reason for Taylor to be able to push her.

Your thoughts?

4 Comments on Advice and opinions needed

sugarcubesandcottoncandy - Thursday, 19 Nov
Ok, I think i posted a response earlier, but i am not sure. i have been thinking about this and how to handle it. Though this is really late, i think the situation will present itself yet again sometime and this could work out for you. so here goes. I understand that Rod is trying to teach Taylor the importance of standing up for herself and judging. Obviously, given her age, her judgement is not the best. Perhaps you can take her aside and tell her that her behaviour is wrong because its abuse of power in a way, and power in any form will be taken away from those who abuse it. tell her that the right way to handle Reagan when she disturbs her, would be with patience. Because thats how Rod and her mom and you handle her when she makes mistakes.

hillaryb - Sunday, 15 Nov
(sorry I know I'm late) but I agree. I have 3 stepchildren too. NONE of them can touch Reighan! period!!

kaylabranscum - Monday, 9 Nov
i would have spanked her if it was my case, which i have a 7 year old step daughter and i totally understand how difficult it can be.

krissiehoran - Monday, 9 Nov
i agree with you. kids need to learn the importance of sharing and respect for others. so i think stick to your guns. my nephew (2) tries the same thing with my dd (1) and my sister and i say the same thing, respect and share!!

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