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23-9-2008 - Depressed

My mood while writing this blog: depressed

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Today I have been very depressed. Today hasn't been any worse than any other day. Sometimes I just get overwhelmed with thoughts. This year really sucked for me. I have had a lot of bad shit happen this year and my situation always seems to get worse. Most of you know that I have a 10 month old and this pregnancy was totally unplanned and for a long time unwanted. Because of my current situation I still have a hard time accepting that in just a few short months that I will have another baby. My husband and I are having a lot of relationship issues due to his irresponsibility, and he wont keep a job, and because of that we are having terrible financial problems. I am a full- time college student and I am about to get a part time job on top of going to school b/c my husband looses a job as fast as he gets one. I dont get much sleep because of school, kids and housework. My husband is more interested in computer games than helping me out. I just move in this little shit hole town a few months ago, and I dont have the time or money to really go out... plus I dont really know anyone here. My grandmother has lung cancer and she probably wont live a whole lot longer.... and the list goes on and on. I just feel like I am trying to make my life better for nothing, that I am just wasting my time and energy. i try to think positive but it has gotten me no where. I just want to crawl into the bed and stay there sometimes. Do to the lack of time I have for my kids I feel like I am neglecting them. I dont even have much time for myself. I sometimes feel like i am the only person that has a shitty life.

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2 Comments on Depressed


marinewife8412 - Tuesday, 23 Sep
I tell you this all the time but you know you have me to talk too. You also know my situation and like always it sounds alot like mine. Just keep your head up, we will stay strong for eachother...ok???

amber0225 - Tuesday, 23 Sep
I'm so sorry you are going through so much. I know it has to be hard having a hubby that loses his job so quick but stay positive for you and your kiddos. No youre not the only person that has a rough life some just hide it very well. I have had pretty rough life at times its better since I married my hubby he finds a way of making everything better. I really hope things start to get better for you. I hope my life really plays out like i want.. also. I will keep your grandmother in my prayers and thoughts!