18-5-2008 - old stuff from main page

My mood while writing this blog: sleepy

3-27-2008

So I am breastfeeding and got my first post partum period March 18th. My most fertile days will be this weekend so we'll be "trying" to conceive and hopefully within a few weeks we get a BFP! If we get pregnant this cycle I will be due Christmas Day. So hopefully it happens on the first try but I'm trying to not get too excited/disappointed if it doesnt happen. I'm not sure how this whole waiting thing works since my first one came as a suprise. Baby dust to you all!

4-7-2008

I want to say I'm 60% sure I'm pregnant...having very heavy discharge (and i'm supposed to be "dry" now), and my cervix has gone so high that it's practically disappeared, but is still very soft and very closed. It hasnt been that closed since my son was born so keeping my fingers crossed. Also got so dizzy all of a sudden yesterday i almost blacked out. no other symptoms though. I'm going to try and test on saturday or sunday if i cant wait for AF on monday haha. If I get negative and still no AF then I will probably be waiting a week after AF was due to test again...If it turns out that i am pregnant this time i will be waiting as long as i can to tell people about it. (hopefully i can hold off until 10-12 weeks depending on how early i show this time!

4-9-2008

So now i'm 75% sure that i'm pregnant. Having crazy bad gas (haha gross i know sorry-but I remember it from the first time-so unnormal for me). Also blue veins becoming very noticeable on my chest. Breasts not sore but they werent last time until i was further along and even then they didnt really bother me. Cervix completely disappeared. Only a few more days until I can test.

4-10-2008

Now 80% sure.....Bad cramping in one leg last nite, feeling very lightheaded even though i've been taking a prenatal vitamin and iron supplement. Feeling slightly queasy this morning but not sure if from vitamin or not. Super sensitive to smells. Sudden insomnia - which i'm not sure is a sign or not but i have it...which is strange since my 5 month old usually wears me out during the day i just cant seem to get tired. More to come!

Adding to what I wrote earlier today...nipples tingling/burning sensation...i cant tell if they are any bigger because i'm breastfeeding and they are already big haha but they feel constantly full and the veins are still very prominent. Dizziness is getting so bad and i'm taking a prenatal vitamin and iron supplement as well. Hope to get my BFP soon so I can make a Dr. appt, i think i'm already anemic...I did not have symptoms this early on with my last pregnancy this is crazy....if i'm not pregnant than i'm not sure what is going on!!!

4-11-2008 (CD 24)

Started having doubts last nite...i guess because I'm letting myself get too excited and there is always that what if? Last nite Dh and I BD and had to stop...got really bad pain in uterus(?) not sure what that is about? Also it was only like 68 degrees yesterday but I felt like my body was on fire! I wanted to sleep with the window open and it goes down to like 45 at nite haha. BBs have begun feeling tender but not real bad. Still no m/s just lots of cramping. Sciatic nerve pain is returning...not sure if from pregnancy hormones or from lifting son? Ugh I need the next 4 days to go by quickly...

4-12-2008 (CD25)

Not sure what's going on today...AF due in 3 days...having pain on my right side and some cramping. Still have the crazy veins popping out of my chest. Feeling lightheaded...havent taken supplements in two days though...Still have heavy discharge and lots of gas (not normally a gassy gal!) BBs feel slightly sore but only if i actually feel them, feel very full though. I'm suddenly having this great fear that i'm not prego even though I have quite a few symptoms....just afraid of the disappointment i suppose. Come on Tuesday already!!!!!

4-13-2008 (CD26)

So now i'm really getting frustrated with my body. I have no clue what is going on....Symptoms seem to be not as prevelant as they were....still there but to a much lesser degree-except the veins they are definately still there. Pain in my lower right side all last nite but not today. Back and hip joints hurt really bad....had this with last pregnancy early on...hopefully its from hormones and not from lifting my son? Debating whether i want to bother buying a test or not...I think if AF is later than a few days and symptoms continue might just go for the blood test since they require it anyway...not sure i'll probably break down and test anyhow haha. feeling tired and rather unmotivated past few days. Also have been dreaming a lot...not about babies but other strange things. Also increased...um how do i say this nicely friskiness? haha i feel like a man its terrible...i keep thinkin about sex LOL even though we havent had any since the painful experience a few days ago! Trying to stay busy ther next few days..i really hope this is my month!

4-14-2008 (CD27)

Not really sure if I sould be expecting AF today or tomorrow, we'll say tomorrow just to be sure. (Last AF came really late at nite so not sure what day to go with). Anywho feeling pretty good...all symptoms pretty much still there...dont feel like AF is coming but it's hard to say since I only had one cycle since my son was born and they say AF is not the same after you have a baby - less cramps apparently! Cervix is still super high and soft which is good :) Starting to look like the incredible hulk - veins bulging out everywhere...and getting spider veins already too :( I think I'm going to break down today and test, but trying my hardest to hold off until tomorrow. A little worried now since I lost all but about 5lbs from first pregnancy...my body has definately changed and my belly looks stretched...now i'm going to torture it all over again and make it worse! Very scared about gaining too much weight with this pregnancy since I gained 46lbs with the first. I certainly don't think hubby looks at me the same way as he used to- I had a pretty smokin body before...which i didnt realize until the post baby body! will keep you posted!!!

4-15-2008 (CD28)

So far no AF! Doesn't feel like she's comin either...tried to test yesterday and got a negative but i should have taken it first thing in the a.m. and didn't. Now i'm probably going to have to wait a few more days and try again. I'll keep you updated if anything exciting happens today :)

4:00p.m. - nothinh yet :) just a little heartburn!

4-16-2008

So I am feeling extremely depressed I still have no idea what is going on with me. AF was supposed to show up yesterday and I ended up taking another dollar store test this morning and got a BFN. Then about an hour ago went to the bathroom and when I wiped there was a small amount of brown blood. I have no idea what is going on...is this AF or implantation bleeding or m/c? No clue...I really don't think it's AF I think it's one of the latter...What I dont get is that the symptoms that I do have aren't like things that my mind could be making up like fatigue or morning sickness...I actually have very noticeable veins on my chest that weren't there before and spider veins and my cervix is very high and soft still. Also i had heartburn all day yesterday and the only other time i've had heartburn was during pregnancy. i'm not religious but i'm seriously hoping that it's only implantation bleeding because i remember how i felt last time when i was pregnant and i can't imagine that i could manifest my veins into becoming more noticeable? i mean we are talking dark blue lines that look like a road map, not i have to struggle to see them, they are popping out at ya! I don't know if i should just keep waiting to see what happens or just go for the blood test!

.....So calledf dr. to see what they suggest and they wanted me to do a blood test. So I went and had that done but couldn't resist and ended up testing AGAIN with a first response and still BFN...ugh i'm so bummed....i just don't get what's going on with my body? Waiting for results from blood test but could be either tomorrow or friday. Not optimistic at all at this point but i guess being depressed about it isn't going to change the end result...i'm not going to bother checking my fertile days or any of that jazz if it happens it happens.

4-17-2008

Well, Dr. office called this morning and said that test came back negative. I asked her about the whole veins on my chest thing since now i'm a little concerned as to what's wrong with me? She said well it's possible that I am pregnant but it hasn't yet produced enough hormones to show up. I'm going to stick with the i'm not pregnant notion though. Actually I feel a bit relieved, right now I'm going to focus on losing those last few lbs since I really thought I was pregnant I was so worried that since I wasn't where I wanted to be weight wise that I was going to gain too much again...so eating healthier and exercising (and my son of course) are my top priorities at the moment. Bleeding is still there a little...got a little more red today but stops and starts, so i'm not sure if AF is trying to come or not? maybe it was implantation bleeding from the BDing in the hot tub last week haha - yeah right...anyhow baby dust to you all, i will still be on here rooting for my other ladies to get preggers and i'm sure in a few weeks i'll be going nuts again thinkin i'm pregnant! haha

4-21-2008

OMG (haha i feel so girly saying that) anywho- so i'm not crazy!!! who new? lol! Went to dr. for pain during sex and some abnormal bleeding...turns out I have a cyst on my ovary. They are sending me for an ultrasound which isn't until may 8th...which is forever from now! I'm not excited that I have a cyst but at least i'm not totally crazy....apparently ovarian cysts can cause nausea, fatigue, frequent urination, painful sex, etc, which look like pregnancy symptoms...even abnormal hair growth! So the good news is having a cyst at least means my body was trying to ovulate i suppose. I'm still a little concerned about it, hoping that it goes away on it's own soon....not sure if i can tolerate sex...hoping that if i do conceive this cycle they can maybe see that on ultrasound may 8th????? not sure will have to look it up! (i am a biology student so i love researching and overanalyzing everything!) anyways i feel totally relieved and hoping that nothing bad comes of this...i think i may have had this before since i've had problems like this before but never went to dr and went away on its own....will keep you updated!

4-23-2008

Ugh I would swear I'm pregnant, but I guess it's just the cyst causing symptoms? I am insanely tired all of a sudden, and i get nauseated now and again. I hope this passes soon!!!!!!

4-30-2008

Haven't updated in a while. We haven't been BDing as much lately...maybe every 3-4 days and no idea what days are my fertile ones this month...just focusing on trying to eat healthier and get my body toned up. I think my body might run on a 30 day cycle not a 28day one. Pain during sex has gone away -still waiting for results of my ultrasound for my cyst. This is only my second cycle since my son was born so it's possible my body is still trying to get things up and running again, the cyst suggests that my body was trying to ovulate last month and perhaps wasn't able to? not sure. Still feeling tired and veins are still present...hormonal imbalance is what the Dr. suggested. my son will be 6 months in two weeks and i'm trying to get him to learn to drink from a cup or bottle or something but all he wants to do is chew on them! I still want to continue giving him breastmilk but would like to taper off some...he still wants to nurse every 3-4 hours which is fine but it'd be nice to let dad feed him once in a while! I'm also super excited since my oldest sister who currently lives in las vegas is moving home with her three kids in july and i couldn't be happier!