Members

As a member you'll be able to receive and send messages, keep your own photobook, agenda, ask questions, participate in the chat, and make new friends. All is free and you don't need email.
Sign up (free & anonymous)

Name: Password:

---

Activity
• Now online | Member search | New members | Comment Spy
• New blogs & Questions | Recently updated profiles
• New photos: Pregnancy | Babies | Bellies | Ultrasound | Member pages
• Latest comments: Forums | Week by week | Baby development

Write a new blog

---

23-4-2009 - Things are going well

My mood while writing this blog: Ok

---

So DH & I are doing so much better. We have gotten back to where we were a long time ago, before I even got pregnant. We are becoming a happy little family. He is taking an active role in taking care of baby girl, and while he still can't seem to manage to help out with night feedings on the weekend when he doesn't have to work, he has been stepping up a lot more. It's so nice. He is also becoming a better husband. That connection between us that hadn't been there is back and we have started spending more time together. We had a sewer issue and ended up our pipes were clogged and we didn't have working sewer for 3 days, just got it back on today, the 2 toliets and shower overflowed and made a huge disgusting stinky mess and he has cleaned up every bit of it and I didn't have to do one thing! I was dreading having to clean up the filth and he came home from work and changed clothes and did it all.
Lorelai is growing so much and so fast. She is the most precious thing in the world. She smiles and grins and laughs and is so alert and likes to interact with everyone and everything now and has begun to vocalize and reach when she wants one of us to pick her up. We've been trying to get her to talk and I swear the other day she said hey. She tries so hard to pop out sounds and words when we're working with her and it's so funny to see the look of determination on her face when she's trying. I love to dress her up and I can't wait until she can sit up on her own and hold her head up for a long period so I can get some really good pics.
My first day back to work is scheduled for June 8th. I have begun to look at the date everyday and cry at the thought of having to put her in daycare. I don't want someone else raising her. I can't imagine being apart from her. Other than when my dad was in the hospital and DH kept her, the only time she has been away from me is the past two days I have let my sister (who lives next door) keep her for about an hour at a time so I could get some dishes and housework done. I think about her the whole time I am away from her. She sleeps in my arms and I am never apart from her. When she wakes up in the mornings I call her my little cuddlebug and she grins and laughs. When she is taking a bottle she wraps her tiny little hand around my pinkie. It's so amazing. When I first came home from the hospital with her I cried thinking that my life is over and how I will never end up going back to school like I wanted or doing anything with my life like I thought I would. I was a little depressed. Today I realized I want nothing more in my life than to take care of my child and raise a happy baby. That is what I was put on this earth to do, not sit in a cubicle all day long and stare at a computer. So I talked with DH when he came home. I told him how I didn't want to go back to work and I ended up crying - it was ridiculous. He is so old fashioned and doesn't want me to work anyway, but I feel horrible putting all the financial pressure on him. Sure we CAN make it on just his paycheck, but we will be just making it. I actually make just as much as he does so it's going to be a huge hit if I do quit working. I told him how when she gets a little older I can maybe find a job at a daycare part time so she will still be with me and I can make money too or that I would work nights or weekends or anything. He told me not to worry about it that we would make do somehow. I love him so much for that but I feel so guilty for putting all that pressure on him. I know he's going to be stressing out worrying about money. I keep telling myself what if something happened and she is the only child we have and I end up missing all the important times in her life because we weren't planning on me staying at home until after we have another baby or because I want to be able to go out and buy a new purse whenever I want or something. My baby is just more important to me than anything else. So I guess I will be telling my employer soon that I won't be coming back. I have yet to take the baby in for them to see so I guess whenever I do that I will let them know I am quitting. I still feel bad and kinda selfish and am seriously worrying about what will happen with us financially but I know so many other people do it and we can too.
Lorelai goes for her 2 month appt tomorrow. I am dreading it. We discovered a tick on her last night and when we pulled it off her she was crying and I knew she was hurting and it made me cry too so I know it's going to be bad to have to see her get shots and have her hurting. I am looking forward to seeing how much weight she has gained and how many inches she has grown. If it's anything like it seems it will be quite impressive.
I had my check up last Friday and doctor said I healed very well and that I had a second degree tear. I asked her about the issue of the shoulder trying to come thru with the head and if that was going to be an issue with subsequent pregnancies and she said since it had happened once it most likely would again. Not looking forward to that but I am already looking forward to having another baby, hopefully a little boy so DH can enjoy buying all the boy things for him and teaching him the manly things. I am so looking forward to the multitude of barbies and ponies and everything pink that I will be enjoying with little Lorelai.
Hope all you ladies are doing well and loving each and every moment with your little one like I am. I can't believe I lived without her for so long. :)

---

Comments on Things are going well