| stephanie1stbaby | |
 | Age: 21 Country: USA Province/region: City: Partner: Hubby Children: Yes, 1 Pregnant: Not anymore Occupation: carrying my baby :) hardest job ever!!! |
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| 28-4-2009 - I need your opinions... |  My mood while writing this blog:thinking...thinking...thinking... |
Okay ladies, I have a dilemma and I need your opinions, advice...EVERYTHING! I recently moved out of state with my DH and we were here for a few months. Well, lately I have been really thinking about whether or not I should have my baby here, or in my hometown. Well, as you probably figured, yes, I am a first time mom. My DH, he knows NOTHING WHATSOEVER about babies...only the things he read about their development. Okay, Ive helped raised my nephew when he was born, but, its nothing like your own baby. He is okay with us going out of town so someone can help me with the baby when she is born. But, everytime I mention it, he makes it seem like I am being selfish. Well, I know I would love to bond with my baby when she is first born...but, I am going to definitely need help when she gets here. I mean, I know I am going to be exhausted from the labor and the few days in the hospital. Hubby doesnt even know how to hold a baby. I try to tell him but he is very arrogant. He doesnt want to be taught anything. Im not trying to sound all helpless, but, I know I will need help. I know NO ONE up here where we stay. I mean, the neighbors and all are nice, but, I havent sat down and actually chat with any of them. Most of my family is in one state-one area at that. Everyone's home is no more than 15 minutes apart where I am from. If we go to his hometown, there is no one there but his mother and she works 6 days a week from 7am-7pm. His father stays an hour away from there and the rest of his family stays FOUR hours from his hometown, they are all spread out...wow!!! I need your advice!!! Am I being selfish by wanting to have my baby in my hometown where I can have help and I know that people are there who knows what they are really doing??? I mean, dont get me wrong, he is going to have two months off of work, so, he will be able to stay too. And, its definitely somewhere for the three of us to stay when we get there. My mom has a bedroom for me and him when we come to visit, and my sister does too. Help me please ladies...I need other opinions besides my own. If you were in my situation, how would you handle it???Please be honest...
6 Comments on I need your opinions...
BlackRussian - Tuesday, 28 Apr
Talk to him and tell him how important it is to be with your family when this baby is born. Maybe not stay for two months, if he doesnt want to, but ask him about 2 or 3 weeks, that is a fair compromise. Best thing you can do is make sure you're all the way comfortable but make sure he is too. He should understand :)
Jennifer85 - Tuesday, 28 Apr
Well i would say your not being selfish just having the mother instinct kicking in before the baby gets here and you are worried about how you are going to tend to her when you have her because your a first time mom But after you have her your motherly instinct will really kick in and you will know what to do then also on the dad not knowing about how to hold a baby i would go buy a baby doll (the baby can play with it later) and try and teach him how to hold a baby and maybe he will be a little better with it when the baby gets here also it could help with some bonding between you and him and maybe you could try talking to him a different way about going back home to have the baby Good Luck
gixxerbabe08 - Tuesday, 28 Apr
It's not selfish where u would want to have the baby. but it sounds like ur nervous to be alone with the baby? if i were u i wouldn't focus on so much of who will help u cause ur motherly instinct will kick in. i was 17 when i had my first and didn't need or have any help from anyone the mother thing kicks in lol and ur husband will only learn with along with u.
brendalee - Tuesday, 28 Apr
Im living 1200 miles away from all my friends and family. Being pregnant without any of my friends around definetly SUCKED. I also don't know anyone here, I basically sit in our apartment all day and do nothing. It wouldn't be selfish if you wanted to move back home, you're the one who's carrying the baby and has to take care of the baby.
agatamay13 - Tuesday, 28 Apr
I would do whatever you want.... maybe your husband doesn't realize how hard it can be postpartum and being around family will help you out a lot so he should be supportive of your decision.
kelly5150rn - Tuesday, 28 Apr
can your mom come stay with you for a little? If not I think it would be a good idea. Call it a mini vacation!
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Date: 16-1-2009 Votes: 86 Comments: 5