December 12th, 2007

04:45 pm: 13 weeks, 3 days
I hoped I was past the worst of the morning sickness, but as it turned out, I wasn't. The past week, really since Saturday night has been hell. I've been sick 5 times in the past week. This morning I got sick and afterwards I still couldn't shake the nausea. I left work early and went to (of all places) Steak n' Shake for lunch. The fattiness helped to settle my stomach some. I slept all afternoon.

This has been my first week without the Prometrium. I haven't taken it since Saturday. I admit that I'm a bit paranoid that maybe something could go wrong, but I'm trying not to let my mind go there. I feel crampy pains in my uterus and surrounding area, so I think the baby is still growing which is obviously a good sign.

I am really tired of feeling sick at this point. I thought it would be over by now, but apparently not. I hope with all my heart that the sickness will be over soon.

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December 17th, 2007

01:11 pm: 14 weeks, 1 day
So far I've been having a fairly manageable day. The weekend was horrible. I am STILL waiting for the nausea to pass. When will it ever end? I hope I'm not going to be one of those that is sick the whole time. I don't know if I could deal with that...

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December 19th, 2007

10:36 am: 14 weeks, 3 days
Yesterday was the roughest day of my pregnancy thus far. I kept getting sick over and over again in the morning. I didn't get a Zofran down until almost 10am and after that I felt much better, but just the few hours in the morning that I spent in an almost constant heaving state was enough to make it an awful day.

Richard and I went out in the evening and finished our Christmas shopping. I ate at 4:30 before going shopping and didn't eat again until 6:30 this morning and I wasn't even hungry! I haven't taken a Zofran yet today and I'm still hoping I won't have to. I just keep eating in hopes that it will keep the nausea at bay.

There isn't really a whole lot to report other than the constant illness. I don't really feel much different although my belly is definitely pooching out. I have my next check up in a week and a day so hopefully I will find out how things are going then. I worry about the baby with all this illness. I hope it is growing as it should be. I know that they say as long as you are able to keep down some food, then the baby probably isn't impacted by the illness, but it is hard to imagine that while my world is flopped totally upside down that my baby is in there just contentedly floating along... Little brat!

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December 20th, 2007

12:56 pm: 14 weeks, 4 days
I got sick when I first got up this morning, but because I hadn't made an attempt to eat anything I was able to get a Zofran down and lay down for another twenty minutes and make it to work only 15 minutes late. Last night I was feeling so sick for the longest time. I kept fighting and fighting. I was determined that I wouldn't get sick. I didn't. It was a miracle.

My stomach is really stretching. It is a bit painful but mostly it just feels odd. I feel like there's weight in there. Last night it was really tender. It's better today. It just acts up when I first stand up and start walking.

I'm getting anxious for when we will finally know the gender of the baby. It is still a month or so away, but I feel like knowing something more about my baby will make me feel even more bonded with it. Just being able to say "he" or "she" instead of "it" will be nice. And then we will be able to name the baby and start calling it by its name.

Richard and I have made a bet with each other. If it is a girl, I have to give him four haircuts whenever he asks me to. If it is a boy, he has to do the dishes four times whenever I ask him to. I still don't really care either way. I kind of got a little psyched up about a boy just because everyone keeps saying they think it's a boy. But if I had a girl I could name her after my mother, which would be so wonderful. Either way, I'm just going to be so happy.

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December 27th, 2007

01:44 pm: 15 weeks, 4 days
I had my prenatal checkup this morning. My uterus is the right size and everything is going well. I like my new OB. She's very friendly and has a good sense of humor.

Today was fun because we listened to the baby's heartbeat with the doppler. This wasn't a new experience, but what was new was that the baby would not hold still! It was just flipping and flopping every which way while the doctor tried to get the heartbeat. She would get it for a split second and then it would be gone and she'd have to go searching again. Finally, the baby held still long enough for her to get a count. 140bpm, much slower than before, which I guess is a good thing. It made me smile knowing that my baby was jumping around and doing all kinds of gymnastics in there. The doctor commented in a way that made me feel that it is more active than normal. She said that with as much as it is moving, I will probably be feeling it really soon. I'm so excited!

I'm not feeling great right now. My lunch isn't settling on my stomach very well, but I'm so thrilled from my appointment that it is carrying me through the day. I can't wait to get my Zofran back!

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January 2nd, 2008

08:47 am: 16 weeks, 3 days
I felt the little booger move this weekend. Mostly on Saturday because I had two caffienated Pepsis. Then periodically throughout the rest of the holiday weekend I would feel a full sensation or a poke or nudge. I laid on my stomach for a couple of minutes yesterday and the baby was like, "Get off me, Woman!"

I took Zofran every day of the weekend. The new doctor only gave me 4mg instead of 8mg tablets so it only lasts for the day. The 8mg ones I could take almost every other day because they would last much longer than the prescribed 8 hours. I haven't taken one yet today and so far (knock on wood), I feel okay. Not great, but okay.

Mark and Staci came to visit yesterday and brought Maci with them. I got to hold and snuggle her for hours and it was wonderful. She has the most adorable little facial expressions. She can focus on your face now, but sometimes you can tell she can't pull you in focus and her eyes will cross. It is so funny. I even fed her, which was wonderful. Richard held and fed her for a while and I could tell he was smitten. It was so sweet seeing this man I love so much looking at a baby with such fascination. I can't wait until it is our baby he is holding.

I have two tiny stretch marks on my belly already. I was bummed about that because I am using stretch mark lotion, but I guess I don't have good genes when it comes to stretch marks. My sister's stomach was destroyed by pregnancy and she had her babies when she was only 19 and 21. I'm 27, so I may not even fare as well as she did. Other than that, I'm content with the process and I'm feeling happy and hopeful. We find out the baby's gender two weeks from today. I can hardly wait!

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January 6th, 2008

06:27 pm: 17 weeks
Last night, Richard cupped his hands around his mouth on my belly and yelled to the baby. The baby responded with a swift kick. After that, the baby wouldn't hold still for the next half hour. I think the baby likes his/her daddy!

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January 7th, 2008

04:39 pm: 17 weeks, 1 day
About an hour ago, I was leaning forward in my chair at work talking to a coworker and the baby kicked me so hard it startled me! Go, little bugger, go!

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January 12th, 2008

06:08 pm: 17 weeks, 6 days
I will be 18 weeks tomorrow and it is less than 4 full days before I find out if my baby is a boy or girl! I am so anxious for Richard to feel the baby move from the outside. I read some info about it online and the general consensus is that you can feel it from the outside between 19 and 22 weeks. I hope it is soon! I just know Richard will be so excited to feel his baby squiggling around in there!

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January 13th, 2008

08:17 pm: 18 weeks
ONLY 2.5 MORE DAYS UNTIL ULTRASOUND TIME!

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January 14th, 2008

07:17 pm: 18 weeks, 1 day
I'm so close to the gender scan that I can hardly wait. I don't know if it's best to drink caffeine before or not. Some women say that it helps, but I've also heard women say the baby wouldn't hold still enough to tell. That seems crazy to me if you have a patient person doing the ultrasound because they can pause what is on the screen. I just really want to know. Richard and I finally settled on first and middle names for either gender. It took a while to get the middle name for a boy, but we finally agreed on something today. I'm so ready to know if my baby is a boy or girl. I feel so connected to it already and I just desperately want to be able to say "him" or "her" or call it by a name instead of saying "it" all the time. It isn't an it! It's a baby! MY baby!

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January 16th, 2008

11:47 am: 18 weeks, 3 days
IT'S A BOY!

We had our ultrasound this morning. Oh, it was SO wonderful! The tech zoomed in on his little heart and it is perfectly formed and beating at 136 bpm. She found his little kidneys and they look great. She measured his belly and his head. She zoomed in on his lips to make sure his mouth was formed well and it's perfect. She finally zoomed in on the privates and wouldn't you know, he had his hand down there! The tech said, "We'll get the baby to move its hand, but I can just about guarantee its a boy because little girls don't usually play with themselves like that." She poked at my belly until he moved his hand and sure enough, little boy parts!

So it looks like we are going to have a little Darwin Patrick. I can't wait! I really thought I didn't care one way or the other, but I am SO HAPPY that it is a boy. I feel like I won some kind of contest or something. I just know I'm going to love every moment with him.

At the end, she zoomed in on his little hands and counted his fingers and then his teeny tiny feet, which were SO PRECIOUS! He has ten fingers and ten toes. He is just 100% PERFECT! I love him so much already!

04:41 pm: More info...

I forgot to mention that Darwin weighs 9 oz, which according to the info I have found means that so far, he's a big baby! The tech commented that he has long legs right now. I wonder if he will be tall?

Right after my ultrasound, I had an appointment with a male doctor that is one of my doctor's partners. He wrote "Darwin Patrick" in the file and he went on a long conversation about how his bachelor's was in religion and how he feels that it applies to evolution. It was very interesting, but kind of obscure. I really liked him, though. He measured my belly, listened to the heart and prescribed a new med called Protonix to treat acid reflux. He feels that this may treat the cause of my nausea instead of treating the symptoms. If he cures my nausea, I will love him.

When I left the hospital, I tried to call my dad first but there was something wrong with his network because I couldn't get through to my sister either. So I called Staci and told her first. Then I texted her sister Dana. I called my coworker Chantal and told her. Then Richard called his mom. Richard and I went to McDonald's for lunch and when I got back to work I was finally able to get in touch with my dad to tell him he is going to have is first grandson. He got my sister on the phone and I told her she was having a nephew. Everyone I talked to was so excited. It was invigorating to be able to share this kind of happy news with the people I care about.

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January 24th, 2008

05:42 pm: 19 weeks, 4 days
I've been off Zofran since Saturday the 19th. I'm not great, but hanging in there and each day seems to get a little better. I'm hoping that this is the beginning of the end of the illness...

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January 27th, 2008

10:09 am: 20 weeks - HALFWAY!
Well, baby Darwin, we're halfway there! You're nudging and rolling around in there and I'm feeling you more and more often. I can tell already that you must be super-strong and very smart. I don't know how I know that you are so smart, I just do.

Your daddy is driving me crazy. Any time I take a sip of caffiene, he's giving me a hard time. He just loves you so much that he doesn't want anything bad to happen to you! He is finally letting my buy things for you, so I think he's more comfortable that you are a beautiful, healthy baby and that he will be holding you in his arms when the time is right.

Mommy's skin is so broken out right now, but her belly has been feeling much better. I am still hungry all the time and I've been getting more and more indigestion, but the nausea seems to be improving by leaps and bounds over the past week.

I bought you some cute clothes yesterday. I got you a onesie that is blue and white striped and says, "I love my mommy" on it. I also got you a white onesie that says, "Party in my crib - 2am". I got many other things too. Mostly blue stuff since most of the things your aunt Staci gave us is yellow or green. I just want to buy everything for you because I want you to have everything I can afford to give you! I love you so much, little Darwin!

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February 1st, 2008

10:26 am: 20 weeks, 5 days
Other than the occasional nausea, I've been feeling really good this week. It is amazing how much more I am able to enjoy my sweet baby when I don't feel sick! Today my department at work is going to The Original Pancake House for lunch. I have spent at least an hour online looking at the menu trying to decide what I want. It is seriously the top priority of my day! I LOVE FOOD! I've always loved food, but I love it now more than ever. I think Darwin has an appreciation for pure deliciousness just like his mama!

Darwin woke me up in the middle of the night last night with three kicks firmly planted on what I think was my liver. I woke up unsure if it had actually happened and he socked me one more time as if to say, "Yep, it was me!" I was sore for a good 20 minutes afterwards and it took me quite a while to fall back asleep. I can just tell that Darwin is going to get along great with his daddy. He's already picking on me!

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February 3rd, 2008

02:04 pm: 21 weeks
Darwin was extra squiggly when I first woke up this morning. I was hungry and figured maybe he was too so hubby and I had a big breakfast. I've had a headache today and so I went back to bed only a couple hours after getting up. I just woke up again at 1:30 and I'm feeling much better, but now I'm hungry again. This little guy just can't get enough to eat! At least I hope it's him because I so don't want to be really fat once he's born!

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February 5th, 2008

06:13 pm: 21 weeks, 2 days
I've been very happy today. I don't sit and analyze my life too often, but I did this morning and realized that at this point in time, I have everything to be happy about. I have a job I love that pays the bills, a devoted and loving husband, a supportive family and friends, and most of all, a beautiful baby boy on the way. What isn't there to smile about? I feel so grateful that my life is what it is right now.

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February 7th, 2008

11:23 am: 21 weeks, 4 days
On Sunday, at the start of 22 weeks, I will officially be 5 months pregnant! How exciting!

I got some decaf Starbucks today and I wasn't hungry so I only had a banana for breakfast. Now I'm STARVING! Come on, lunch time!

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February 8th, 2008

07:37 am: 21 weeks, 5 days
Darwin is awake this morning and nudging around. I am so hungry! I read that next week, he will weigh around a pound and be around 11 inches long from head to heel. He's such a big boy! I hate saying I can't wait to see him because I obviously want to wait until he's big and healthy, but I'm so excited! It is going to be the most wonderful thing holding him in my arms and examining every teeny little piece and part of him. Now I see why all moms think their baby is the most wonderful baby. How could you not feel that way toward a life that has grown inside you? He makes every day a happy one.

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February 13th, 2008

07:41 am: 22 weeks, 3 days
I woke up at 3:30 in the morning and couldn't fall back asleep until 5. I folded receiving blankets and wash cloths and put them on the shelves in Darwin's room. I'm not sure why, as I still want to go through and wash them later, but I just thought it would look nice and make me feel more prepared. Darwin didn't seem to want me to go back to sleep because once I laid back down, he proceeded to poke, prod, kick, and squiggle for over a half hour straight. I tried to feel him from the outside, but still no luck.

My 5 month checkup was yesterday. I had only gained 1 lb since 4 months! I couldn't believe it with the way I've been eating, but Darwin measures the right size, so I'm happy! I asked when we will be able to feel him move on the outside and the doctor said it's impossible to guess. It depends on the positioning of the fetal sack, the position of the placenta, which direction the baby is facing, how big he is, how vigorous his movements are and a bunch of other things. So I got the message. I need to just be patient!