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08-9-2009 - I\'ve file for divorce!

My mood while writing this blog: tearful

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Hello to all of my mommies friends again,

Thank you so much for all of your encouraging words and advice. I have to be honest, I feel so vulnurable right now. I still cry every time I think about it. I have been crying and can't eat anything ever since the drama broke out. Every time I look at Victor, I cried because Victor looks so much like my fking, bastard, scumbag husband.

On Friday, he and I took Victor to the doctor and on the way, I asked him if he really wanted a divorce, and he said there's no turning back for us. The only good thing out of that doctor's visit was Victor weighted 16 lbs and 14 ounces! He also got his vaccinations too.

I filed for divorce on Saturday already, the attorney said he will send the file to court today. Honestly ladies, I'm so sad and depress right now. As much as I'm upset at my husband, but I can't believe that things are going so bad for us right now. I know that he's a jerk, a male gigalo, but I loved him so much and it's so hard for me to accept the fact that he doesn't love me any more. I have been crying pretty much for the last 3 weeks. I have been throwing up too, I don't feel like eating anything. My parents kicked him out yesterday from the trailer, and he asked if he can move out today.

This morning, before going to work, I went over to the trailer and asked him if he can arrange some time, maybe 1 or 2 minutes to come over and see Victor. He flat out said that he will be busy moving, he probably wouldn't have time to visit Victor. How busy can he get without seeing his child for the last time. I know for sure, as soon as he's out of the trailer and move somewhere else, he will never, ever come and visit Victor. I bursted into tears because I can't believe how cruel he is, it's his only son and he doesn't want to see Victor.

I thanks God for my family because they are supporting me all the way. I thanks God for giving a beautiful and happy baby boy Victor. I thanks God for me having many supportive friends online and offline. I have to be strong from now on because if I can't get over this and fall down, no one will take care of Victor. And if that happens, I will never forgive myself. Victor already don't have a dad, he can't afford to not have a mom that is not strong enough to take care of him...It will be hard on me ladies...

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10 Comments on I\'ve file for divorce!


Kathren - Sunday, 27 Sep
I am so sorry to hear this Tiff. Sadly, at least you found out now before Victor is older and real damage could be done to him by a father who obviously doesn't care about him.Good luck sweetie. I hope things get better for you very soon.

christinalynn - Friday, 11 Sep
wow,all i can say is sorry........

StaceyL - Thursday, 10 Sep
Tiff, I'm so sorry to hear about what has been going on in your life. Just remember that if he's that much of an a*hole, you're better off without him in your life. So while it hurts to be going through the pain right now, getting rid of him is the right thing to do. Also, he says all these hurtful things about Victor and spending time with him but realize he probably says some of this not because he truly means it but because he's trying to lash out because he's on the defensive after getting caught. It's okay to cry but know that with time you'll also get stronger so that you can fight for what's best for you and Victor. Good luck! P.S. Just think of what a great example you are being for your son so that you can tell him years from now how you stood up for yourself and him. You're a great mom!

Baby Bliss - Wednesday, 9 Sep
Tiff- I am at work and holding back my tears. All I have to say is you are strong and I am proud of you. Really you are a great mom and never forget that. We are here for you.

Phoenix39 - Tuesday, 8 Sep
Once again, document everything and let the courts know like mommylove said that he just married you for his visa, maybe they will blacklist him somehow to ever be able to bring anyone into this country. Don't make life easy for him and I am glad your parents gave him the boot, someone had to. But make sure you have all the documentation that you need to be able to find him for child support, sometimes they like to take off into hiding and if anything like the Canadian government it is up to the mother to find them.

mommylove01 - Tuesday, 8 Sep
I'm sorry im in tears myself! But I say get child support screw his ass over now! And when you have court say that he just married you for papers and say he couldnt wait much longer to divorce you and you being naive fell in true love with him. Anyways the least he sees Victor the more money you get. Dont think about that bastard! Remember god does things for a reason and he has your destiny! xoxoxoxoxoxxoxo

mcmommy1 - Tuesday, 8 Sep
Im sorry that this is all happening to you but you are right you need to stay strong for your son if you need to talk we are all here

kthydiver3 - Tuesday, 8 Sep
I am so sorry for what you are going through...I know it doesnt seem like it right now...but things happen for a reason. At least you have Victor, someone who will give you unconditional love. Stay strong and remember that you WILL be better off with out him.

hmm923 - Tuesday, 8 Sep
Not to use an old cliche, but take life one day at a time. Just force yourself to eat a bit - - some comfort food or even ice cream. Just get in some calories - - it takes a lot of energy keeping up with little babies. Know that you and your family are enough for Victor. If your husband doesn't want to be a part of his life, it is his loss. I am so sorry you're going through this, but I'm so proud of you for how well you're handling it. Really try to take care of yourself - - Victor needs you.Hang in there, you're in my prayers!

DiandClover - Tuesday, 8 Sep
Stay strong - you will both be better off in the long run. Sounds like your parents are there to help, and that is great news. Raise Victor to love and respect strong women like you. Without bio dad as a bad influence, he will grow to become a fine man.