Members

As a member you'll be able to receive and send messages, keep your own photobook, agenda, ask questions, participate in the chat, and make new friends. All is free and you don't need email.
Sign up (free & anonymous)

Name: Password:

---

Activity
• Now online | Member search | New members | Comment Spy
• New blogs & Questions | Recently updated profiles
• New photos: Pregnancy | Babies | Bellies | Ultrasound | Member pages
• Latest comments: Forums | Week by week | Baby development

Write a new blog

---

09-11-2009 - My Heart hurts so much!!!

My mood while writing this blog: mad

---

I AM MAD!!! So, I got a call today from the genetics counseler. I had this talk with a doctor already and they said that nothing was wrong with my baby. Well today I answered the phone and this lady says you tested positive. I said positive for what and she said downs!!!!! WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I started screaming at this woman and telling her to basically f' off. I threw the phone at my dh and just cried. He talked to her and she told him, quote "I didnt say that the baby has downs I said it has markers for it". That is NOT WHAT SHE SAID TO ME... she said I tested positive for it. All my tests came back great except for my hcg test and that is only one marker. My age is what did it! I can't believe these people. I requested a CVS when I was very early so I would not get to the point where my child had a name and I KNEW IT like I know my baby! These people are cruel and I am SO MAD... So, she tells dh that we can wait till the echo on the baby for more clarification. That is not for another 5wks. WTF???? I know there are alot of people out here that would take whatever they got no matter what, but I am not that person and I said it tons before. I would NEVER bring a child into this world at my age with a genetic disorder just so they could either die a horrible death or they could live alone not knowing where their mommy and daddy went. I would never make my child suffer like that, not when I can prevent it. But that choice has come and gone. At 12 weeks when they could have told me there was something wrong they denied me the chance to use the CVS and now my baby has a freakin name and an identity. So now I am left with the choice to have an amnio to see if it in fact has anything wrong with it and take the chance there is nothing wrong with it at all and then lose it to the procedure or do nothing and take the chance that my poor baby will suffer horribly and unjustly.... THIS IS NOT FAIR! I dont know what to do anymore and my heart hurts so much. This baby should have never been, EVER... I should not have gotten pg, I had doctors swear I could not get PG and now after all this crap I get this? They told me a month ago NOTHING was wrong with the baby and now there is a chance? WTH is wrong with people? My heart hurts so much and there is no one to talk to about this. There is no forum on here to talk about this. Everyone is talking about how their amnio was great and things worked out so well but no one is talking about what if it isnt and I am lost.

---

8 Comments on My Heart hurts so much!!!


maha55 - Wednesday, 11 Nov
..please try to relax in this challenging time..the head can create stress and as u said its just a marker..our ages push things way up high (and my midwife told me Downs is actually more common in younger women - they make such a BIG deal about older mums)..relax, trust, tune in and talk to baby......and I tell you something else they also make such a big drama about Downs babies and people..they are some of the most loving, happy and gorgeous human beings I have ever met.....its a hard time..you dont have to make a decision straight away...this baby is also a blessing...sending love xxxx

ragtopgirl - Tuesday, 10 Nov
o man, i'm so sorry to hear you so upset. take a deep breath, it' s only a marker, not a sentence....just try and relax, but I know it's hard. ;(

erikatx - Tuesday, 10 Nov
Hello... I will respond to you later! ... but yes there are many forums out there for woman in your shoes. babycenter has several, here is one: http://community.babycenter.com/groups/a14145/prenatal_testingYOu are not the only one going through this nor will you be the last. Just pray for stregth at the moment.

mylilfabulous - Tuesday, 10 Nov
I hope everything turns out well pls don't stress out. My doctor told me my baby might have a heart problem when she reecived the results of the ultrasound were the measure that baby at 20 weeks. I been trying not to think about it and not to stress about it because I just figure that god does things for a reason and am not going to kill my baby because I believe in my heart my baby is fine :)

titangoddess - Tuesday, 10 Nov
I need to add something. I tried not to do it but it seems that I have made it seem that indeed the baby does have Downs, but infact she does not at this point. We are markers for downs, not the actual test saying we have it. The problem is the test and the results and what to do after that happens. Thanks ladies I am still a mess.....

jcombs - Tuesday, 10 Nov
I have a cousin that tested positive, but he doesnt have full blown down. He is still able to function and understands. He is just a little slower. So I pray that you calm down and know that even though there is a chance the baby has downs, there are different degrees of it and it doesnt always mean the baby will not be able to live a normal life. Keep your head up,

modelimited - Tuesday, 10 Nov
There are SO MANY people that go through these screenings and have positive results but deliver PERFECT babies! The tests aren't accuarate! My doctor won't even do them because they aren't accurate! Don't worry. I'm sure you and your baby will be fine.

MommaGiGi - Tuesday, 10 Nov
Please, oh please try to calm down. This is why I didn't bother with screening tests. They are just that....screening and are often wrong! I can't have the amnio because of my fibroid tumors....although I wouldn't anyway. The only conclusive test is the amnio. All others are screenings and like I said have a high percentage of being wrong. I want to write more but can't because I'm about to leave for work. Take a deep breath! Man I want to slap that nurse for calling you like that. Sending much love and prayers your way.