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08-1-2009 - 28 weeks!

My mood while writing this blog: just fine

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Well Hello everyone.....

I havent found much time for blogging since joining so I will take some time to write a little about everything.

I started my pregnancy with quite a bit of morning sickness and actually lost 10 pounds. Then I broke my foot and spent about 8 weeks recovering. But since then everything has been pretty smooth sailing. As of yesterday I am measuring about 29 weeks and have gained a total of 2 pounds (from prepregancy weight) 10 pounds since first trimester. Physically I have recently started to feel quite uncomfortable after I eat (usually too big a portion tee hee hee) and I have really noticed a reduced lung capacity. But boy o boy has stress been getting to me emotionally.

I am a child care provider I watch 3 boys in my home they are 1, 2, and 4 yrs old. the 2 and yr old also live in my home. I have recenty let my 13 yr old niece move in as she was having troubles at home. Two 13 yr old girls and two toddlers under one roof with a pregnant lady.. you can see the stress adding up I am sure! Truth be told the kids are delightful and easy to deal with for the most part. The other adults in my house however have been more challenging. My roommate (and the boys Mom) has been out alot lately and quite absentee in spirit, with a foul attitude in general. I have recently spoke to her about her effect on me and the rest of the household and she has made an effort to change (we shal see how that goes) My partner has been suffering from some depression and has recently been dealing with major family issues and had just not been present for me through this pregnancy. I have been patient and understanding until now but I realy can't any longer... I just long to be pampered and honoured and adored as the vessel with which his child will come into the world and not to mention to feel truly loved by this man. I am compassionate that he feels depressed (so do i ) but I need more... how do you tell someone this without offending, without getting a defensive response?? His depression has made getting and keeping a job difficult and I currently earn 90% of our household income.. our bills are of course all past due, and I am so nervous about what to do when this baby comes and I am unable to earn as much....

...anyhoo I gotta run have to make the bank so i can put money on the bills....yippee... i just wish i could justify a trip to the spa.... ahhhhhhhhh one can dream right?

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2 Comments on 28 weeks!


thamouse - Tuesday, 10 Feb
Wow, this sounds familiar.
I went through a very rough spot about a month or two ago where I was wondering if we should actually stay together.
I am working 40 hours a week, my husband works as security at a local bar/club. Our schedules are so different, our time together limited and we seem to live along side each other rather than with each other.
I often feel like I'm just a nice addition, but not the woman he fell in love with. I know he loves me, but he sure doesn't express it much.
Today I had a major frustration as I found out our internet is disconnected (I post this from work computer) while I had repeadetly asked him to pay the bill so we wouldn't get disconnected and having to pay a fee to get connected again. I found out we don't have enough money in our account to pay the bill...we go out for dinner almost every night because I am too tired to cook and he is too lazy, this adds up so quickly.

He is doing better though, about 2 months ago he barely seemed alive and having any spunk. All I did was turn to friends and family and I prayed, I am a fervent believer in prayer and after praying for a bit he seemed to be coming around and getting happier and more enjoyable.
I also am investigating what men need from women. If I lack in giving him something he desperately needs and he doesn't know he needs it, because as many men, he isn't in touch with his feelings, I might just need to humble myself and not be so selfish and give a little more than to just take.
I have a strong personality and tend to do things my way and tend to makes scenes and over exagerate thigns, so for me to actually look into what he needs is difficult for me, but I'm definately willing to try to see if this works.
Anyway...sorry, quite a long comment, but know I feel for you...


kanojoca - Friday, 9 Jan
Hey hun,

oh i 'm so sorry that you are going through this with your partner..i have had a lot of friends in the past who have suffered with depression and my previous job in canada was an addiction counselor so i saw a lot of clients with depression,from basic down in the dumps, to full on bi-polar.

So you guys do not live alone in your house together??? He is not working..is he talking to you about his issues?? Maybe its time to see a couples therapist or get him some help if he hasn't seen anybody already. He might need some medication to counter act his moods and keep him on a straight path.

I'm not too sure what else to suggest, but from a counselor's point of view he sounds like he needs some treatment of some sort. This is not the time to let things go, you are bringing a baby into this family and needs to buck up his act and get a job and support his family. Depression or no depression i wouldn't put up with it. Counselling, someone for him to speak to, meds something.. but he needs to want to do this. He can't mope around while you carry his child work as much as you can and get in debt.

Get on it girl, or things might get worse when the baby comes. He needs to be diagnosed!!

Good luck and feel free to mail me anytime
hope i helped a bit
laura
xx