06-2-2009 - HELP!!!!!

My mood while writing this blog: DEPRESSED

So I guess I need HELP!!!

Here is the story...

I got back together with my EX ( the baby's father) like 5 weeks ago then 2 weeks ago he broke up with me AGAIN!!!! .. he only "tried" to make it work for 3 weeks. Well anyways 2 weeks ago we broke up again per his request AGAIN!!!... well i found out that the past 2 and a hlaf weeks he has been seeing someone else and we were together!!! well yea the chick is now his girlfriend... since then he hasnt called me to check on the baby... he tottally has written me off.. he is out getting drunk all the time smoking pot and taking pills.. Just found out. Its not that i want "that" stuff in my life but my god i have no support from the one preson it should mater the most. i dont get how he could just move on that quickly and i dont understand how it doesnt bother him that we are not together especially having this baby!!! im so hurt and i feel betrayed. Im scared and im all ALONE! Sorry if i miss spelled ect. ot really paying taht much attention through the tears. I just wish things didnt hurt so bad... it seems so easy for him to just shut stuff off... and the for me i keep seeing things and hearing things about him and his new GF ... i cant seem to get away from all the hurt.

ANYTHING WOULD HELP!!!

Thank you

*J*