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Charlie James Sex: boy Born: 20 January, 2008 Age: 4 years & 27 days Birthday in: 338 days Starsign: Capricorn Development: See the 32 months page. Biggest achievement so far: -

Charlies pregnancy story

I found out I was 6 weeks pregnant in early May 2007. I started getting cramps that were a little like period pains (that was my first symptom-and I thought I was going to have a period - but never did!) , and I went on this site and asked everyone if it was normal. Everyone was so great and they gave me some brilliant reassuring advice, as my midwife was not so great. She told me that the cramps could mean that I would lose the baby and her exact words were 'if you lose it, you lose it'! Charming! I was devastated and so worried!

Thankfully as of today, 3rd June, the cramps have stopped and that is such a big relief. I never had any bleeding which was also great. I took everyones advice and have changed my midwife who I will hopefully get to see just after my first scan.

7th June 2007.

I am really happy, just woke up to the NHS letter on my doormat with my first scan date on it being 3rd July 2007 at 11.05am.

26th June. Exactly one week to go till the ultrasound - it cant come any faster as I am worrying myself sick! Still not having any symptoms - no sickness or anything. Although I am still getting tummy cramping which is scary - as I would have thought i'd stopped cramping by now! Take care you guys and I will update you in a week. x

UPDATE 04.07.07

ALL WAS FINE!!!! It was amazing. Thanks to everyone for all your good luck wishes. The scan went well. The only slight hiccup was that they found I had an overian cyst on my left ovary. They told me it was a simple cyst and shouldnt cause any problems. Also, my due date has been changed slightly so will be in week 13 tomorrow!! Horray!! They told me the baby is a little larger so I am now 12 weeks 6 days today. Take care everyone thanks for your support xx

14 weeks today! Wahey second trimester here I come! Its such a relief to be here..... I still worry all the time (what's new huh?) !!! Now I just cant wait to have a HUGE big belly as I feel now I wanna show it off.

Week 15 - 18th July 2007 Yeah I am now in week 15. I am trying to decide whether to get a private ultrasound done because I am such a worrier, but not sure what to do as we really need to save the money. But the next appointment isnt until the 31st August - that's ages away!! Also, I have heard if I have it done at 16 weeks I may be able to find out the sex....and I am so ready to know what it is now! I have been cramping abit more lately.I also find a get sharp 'prod' type pains in my mid lower tummy. Its just wierd all the stuff that you get when you are preggers! I am still counting my blessings that I have not had any sickness yet and fingers crossed it will stay that way!

23rd July - nearly 16 weeks

I am going for a scan on Friday coming up. i will be 16 weeks 2 days by then so hope to find out the sex! I am paying for a provate scan as the NHS one isnt until 31st August which is ages away! Its going to cost £60 and I have had to save up for it but I hope it will be worth it in the end. Oh well I will post an update after my scan with hopefully some good news. Wish me luck!!!!!

16 weeks today - 25th July 2007 I bought a doppler from Ebay and it is the best - and I found it! I actually found the heartbeat at last. I found it about 2 inches below my bellybutton and really had to push quite firmly and at first I heard a 'swishing/swooshing' sound and I new I was close, then I began to hear tiny pumps of the heart which I calculated it to be 149 beats per minute. Well the little nipper was really hidden!!

I am still feeling fine, I am really at that 'just fat or pregnant stage'!!!

WISH ME LUCK!!!

27th July I just got back from the scan - it was amazing!!! and............drumroll please.......

IT'S A BOY!!!

We are so happy. We didnt mind what the sex was as long as it is healthy but we can safely say it is 100% certain to be a boy! (see the pics and you will get what I mean lol).

16 weeks 6 days - 31st July. Today i had an appointment to see my new midwife. I heard the heartbeat which was lovely and all ok, and all my tests came back OK. My downs syndrome test was very low and I have a 1 in 38000 chance of having a baby born with downs which I am really pleased to learn. I wanted these tests done only because my brother is severly dissabled and has Autism and I thought it right that I should check. I am getting alot of aches and pains today and I took the opportunity to ask my new midwife about them and she reassured me that all was fine. Better than what my old 'blunt' midwife said back in May eh?!!! Talk about worry me unnecessarily!

17 weeks 2 days on 3rd August. Hi everyone, been feeling really great since last scan apart from that one of my eyes is slightly blurry, not real bad but just abit annoying...Other than that I feel GREAT and am enjoying being preggers. And I havent had any cramping since Monday which is good!

I cant wait till I feel Charlie !!!!!

Wednesday 8th August - 18 weeks! Well I am so pleased to be 18 weeks but had abit of trauma yesterday which was sooooo scary. I had just a tiny bit of spotting - only lasted a very short while and was browny/red colour - not bright red. I panicked as I was at work and my husband came and picked me up and took me to the day care centre at the hospital. They used a doppler and located the heartbeat but I tell you my little bubba was frightening me as it took the doctor 5 minutes to find the heartbeat! It was the longest 5 minutes of my life as I can usually find the heartbeat straight away with my doppler at home. So the baby was fine thank god and the bleeding stopped and they told me if it comes back then I must go back in for further internal checks just to make sure alls well. This has made me feel so scared, especially as I was feeing so good and not worrying so much as well! I am not having any cramping which is great but this has now opened a new can of worms and I am counting down the days until my big ultrasound on the 31st August! Please keep your fringers crossed for me that I dont get anymore bleeding! I cant believe it just when I was starting to feel great this happens. I can only think forward and stay positive and just hope that it was just a little bit of 'old blood' and nothing nasty.

Monday 13th August. Still no more bleeding but getting pain quite low down in my tummy I guess near the pubic bone. The pain only lasts a few seconds at a time but comes and goes quite regularly. Still, I listened to Charlie on the doppler last night and boy oh boy was he active in there and his heartbeat was ace so I guess alls fine. The hardest thing about it is everytime I go to the loo I am checking in case I bleed. Its a nightmare! Hopefully after my next scan on the 31st August I will feel abit more reassured.

Wednesday 15th August - 19 weeks today! Well I am really happy to be in 19 weeks. I am not quite so stressed out at work now which is good but me and hubby have started to argue a little bit but we always seem to make up and blame it on tiredness and stresses and money woes! I am still cramping!! This time it really hurts and tends to come after lunchtime but when I wake up its fine in the mornings. The cramps are in my lower abdomen kind of central and they are sharp and quick pains that come and go. So still worrying whats new but no more bleeding thank god. I did listen to Charlie last night and wow he was very close to the doppler as it was really noisy and amazing, he seems to be sounding much stronger now which is great. I just cant wait to feel him move! I am not sure if I have been imagining something but I thought I had felt the odd 'vibrating' movement in there once or twice and when I was pushing on my doppler last night I wasnt sure whether I felt a 'shifting' movement, still I guess I have got all that excitement to come and it had better come soon!!

This deserves an earlier than anticipated update on my page!!!

I think I have finally felt baby Charlie !!!!!!

Ok I was using my doppler in bed with hubby and he sounded really active in there, quite a few kicks and punches! lol - and then it was really strange, I gave the headphones to hubby to listen to and I felt this kick and I shouted as it freaked me out and James said the same time I felt the kick he heard it toooooo!! It has happened loads of times since then, and I tried it again last night and the same thing happened, although I only seem to feel him when I am pressing my tummy with a doppler and it seems at the moment I need to be lying completely down. He seems to be so active at bedtimes I bet he is going to keep me up all the time! lol.

Wednesday 22nd August - 20 weeks today! Half way through!! Well I am still feeling Charlie move but only when I am in bed relaxed and normally when I am pushing on my tummy with the doppler. he seems very active at the moment and I hope I feel him move properly soon! I feel ok I guess, still getting the odd ache and cramping pain in my tummy but other than that thankfully all seems well. I am looking forward to my big scan a week on Friday and that will be lovely to see our baby again. I am counting down the days!

This was me at 12 weeks (ish) above.... a little bump :)

Well I had to put another diary entry on here after last night!!!! (27th August - 20 weeks and 5 days) Me and hubby were in bed and I could feel little Charlie moving around. James put his head on my tummy and Charlie was kicking daddy's head! lol it was amazing and James told me that he has never felt so happy.... For once I know I am not going mad and I am not imagining it! Charlie is definately kicking me... I still cant feel him during the day and its only when I am really relaxed but I think his movements will get stronger soon....I just know it! Today is Tuesday morning so back to work for me - but i am looking forward to my big scan on Friday @ 9.15am. Yipppppeeeee! x

Friday 31st August - Big U/S day!!! Went for my ultrasound today and thankfully, alls doing really well. They checked everything - the babys heart, the brain, the neck, the lips and everything which is really reassuring and all was normal. They also reconfirmed that baby was a BOY as he was playing with his winkie!!! lol how funny - he was tugging at it. He was also scratching his head which was really cute. I am again really over the moon. He is the correct size for his dates. Also, the fluid came out as normal so I can only assume that what I am getting is problem discharge! The only down side is that my cyst on my left ovary has dissappeared - but a new one has appeared on my right ovary!! They told me not to worry about it though its quite normal many women get it during pregnancy.

Monday 3rd September - 21 weeks 6 days. Well its Monday again and I am back to work. Anyways, its official, I am feeling baby move all the time now. HOWEVER its lovely it really is but last night he was very naughty and woke me up loads of times punching and kicking me. Its amazing but horrid in the middle of the night when you are trying to sleep and you got work the next day!

Wedesday 5th September - 22 weeks Waheeey 22 weeks today. Feeling ok. Tummy is getting bigger and baby is kicking quite alot. Not feeling him move when I stand up much but when I am sitting down or lying down he does. The alarm woke me up for work this morning and it must have woken him up too as he started to kick me! lol. I still get the odd pain under my ribs. I saw the midwife yesterday and listened to the heartbeat which she said was perfect. She also told me to look out for some signs of preclampsia as that can happen around now if it is going to. Other than this though I am ok. Not sleeping very well as struggling to find a comfortable position to lie in but I am hoping that will come!!

ABOVE - 22 weeks 3 days. Well this is me today - feeling huge and I have just got home from my brother in laws wedding which was nice! I have been feeling so self conscious about what to wear for the wedding as nothing fits and the only maternity trousers I could find were black so that is what I have had to buy. On a lighter note, in the UK at the moment 'smock tops' are all the rage so I can still wear my usual size top as it flairs towards the bottom part hence still manages to go over my bump! I actually had a nice time and everyone commented on my fatness and how I am 'blooming'!!!! lol

9th September 2007 - 22 weeks 4 days. Well its Sunday and I was chilling with hubby after yesterday as it was a long long day at the wedding and my back and ankles hurt. We were sitting in front of the TV and I felt kicks so I told James to look at my tummy closely. We watched, and we watched and nothing happened and then, typically when we gave up he started kicking again! Anyway we tried again and hopefully watched my tummy, when BAM, he kicked and you could see the kick through my skin - my skin moved out from the inside! lol. We were both amazed because even though he has been kicking I have never witnessed my skin moving like that before. I had to share! :-)

12th September - 23 weeks today. Yay I am 23 weeks today. I still only feel Charlie move when I am in bed or sitting down, not so much any other times but I am sure he will get stronger.

13th September - 23 weeks and 1 day I have been getting real bad back pain and its worse in the evening after a day at the grind. I feel like I am falling apart! Didnt sleep very well last night. The little girl who lives next door was wailing for ages last night and kept me awake. I am at work but just feel absolutely shattered and could really do with going home and resting to be honest! oh, and I just sneezed and it felt like my tummy was being pulled away from my body! I wish I could go home! On a lighter note, Charlie is so active, like a wiggly worm!

19th September. 24 weeks.Still feel like I am getting bigger by the day and feeling Charlie move all the time now apart from when I am standing up. I am at work real early this morning its horrible - we are so busy here just want to walk out but it pays the bills you see! Not really much to report this week to be honest except that I am really pleased to have made it this far and that Charlie is now 'viable' out of the womb this week! Also, I have never mentioned it before but I am a smoker, and I know its taken me ages but this week I have finally called it quits. I am taking each day at a time as its hard but I am getting there!

26th September - 25 weeks. All I can say is - wow, where is the time going?!!! Its now starting to fly by. I am getting bigger by the day and strangers are staring at me when I get on the bus obviously aware that I have a protruding bump! lol. Not really much to report, which I guess is a good thing. My back has been the only thing that has caused me problems recently, after I feel and also I overdid it last weekend and went on a shopping spree to Lakeside and did loads of walking and it did me in! We also went to IKEA and got a cot and loads of other baby furniture and stuff it was brilliant. The spare bedroom is finally going to be redecorated in part this Saturday, I cant wait till its done so I can get things sorted as my maternal instincts are coming on now and I just want to get the place sorted in case little un comes early! lol. Yeah so realy only getting back/butt pain at the moment. Thats cos of walking too much and my posture isnt great as I sit in an office all day. Charlie is moving lots and lots. Oh and I forgot to add - I had my first bowt of heartburn last Saturday night. It was absolutely awful and I dont want it again! I have never had it before until then and it was 3am and it made me feel so sick and horrid. But is was my fault really as me and hubby went out for a meal Saturday night and I ate a massive steakhouse dinner! lol

3rd October 2007 - 26 weeks today! I am generally OK but had one or two probs yesterday and I was scared. Had a pain just above my bellybutton and Charlie hadnt moved all day! It was so scary. i nearly rang the midwife last night when I finally felt a little kick so I didnt. Today I had to go to hospital for my eyes cos one of them is still blurry (I have had a blurry eye since 16 weeks approx). They done some tests and said the back of my eye is slightly swollen which could be pregnancy related - great! Nothing serious but due to the blood vessels or something... I have got to travel to Ashford hospital soon and have an eye x-ray done. On a better note, while I was in the hospital having my eyes tested Charlie started kicking like mad and I had to put my hands over my belly as it was moving all over the place! lol. We have had the ceiling replastered in the bedroom and have painted it just got to wallpaper the walls and get a new carpet and then horray - we are done. Getting there!!

Tuesday 9th October 26 weeks 6 days Thought I'd post a little update today as I wont be near a computer tomorrow. I am having the day off tomorrow and my PC at home is out of action because its had to be stored elsewhere as we are doing up the bedroom which should be finished by Wednesday next week! Anyways I am really excited - tomorrow I am going for a 4D ultrasound scan in Canterbury - the same place where I had the 16 week scan. I cant wait to see my little bubba so clearly! He is really funny at the moment, when I lie on my left side he kicks me and punches at the mattress! lol Its as though he wants to escape! I keep saying to him that its way too early yet!!

Friday 12th October 27 weeks 2 days - Hi all! I thought I would just let you know the 4D scan was amazing on Wednesday although he was very naughty and kept hiding from us! If it wasnt the umbilical cord in the way of his face it was his hand or his foot as yes believe it or now the sweetie was sucking on his feet bless him! I have a DVD of the scan which I will treasure but I dont know how to load it up on here so give me time and I will see what i can do! I would recommend the 4D scans to everyone if you can do it as you can see so much. We have decided that he looks like James more than he does me - he has James' nose but we think he has my lips! lol He also has really cute chubby chops which run in my side of the family as I had chubby chops when I was a baby!

Thursday 18th October - 28 weeks and a day! Well I was off work yesterday which was nice and we had the front room carpet and bedroom carpets laid and everything is falling into place. Me and hubby have changed bedrooms and the back bedroom now has all of Charlies stuff in it! :-) Its so cute I cant wait to put the cot together at the weekend or if I can pusuade hubby to do it earlier maybe tonight! lol. As for the kicks, well Charlie has changed his ways. He is kicking me just under my ribs now and much higher up which I am not used to and it feels wierd! If I dare to press on my tummy he kicks my hand - he doesnt like it! lol. Oh well best go. Another day another dollar!

Wednesday 24th October - 29 weeks! Well here we are another week has come round. Going sooooo quickly now I must admit I am starting to get a bit scared! lol. Saw my midwife yesterday. She felt my tummy and said I am smack bang on target and am the right size for my dates which is good. Charlies heartbeat was heard which was lovely and I told her about the discharge thingy that I have been getting. To be honest, I tried so hard to describe it to her it was a nightmare she said if it gets any heavier then I should go and have it checked out at the hospital which is what i am going to do. Had to go to hospital after seeing midwife yesterday anyway to have routine blood tests done - yes MORE routine blood tests! lol I had to take a ticket like you do at the meat counter at the supermarket and had to wait 2 HOURS before I was seen - my local hospital are useless I was really annoyed that my midwife couldn't just do the tests. Never mind hay ho. Seeing the midwife in just 2 weeks time now - scary as it used to be every 7 weeks or so!

Wednesday 31st October - 30 weeks!! well I cant believe I am now 30 weeks pregnant. Time has gone so quickly I am so scared! All in all I am coping well. I am still working full time as a conveyancer its stressful so I am being abit careful but I hope to be able to hold out till xmas...we shall see! Sleeping is becoming abit more of a problem lately - nightmare. I have got one of those pregnancy pillows which has helped me alot but it makes me hot in the night where you kind of have to hug it! lol. My hubby is also a bad snorer and wakes me up all the time! One of these days he is gonna have to have the sofa! lol.

Wednesday 7th November. 31 weeks. Well another week has flown by. I am fine, just EXTRA tired today as a certain somebody was really trying to jump out of my belly at 11pm last night until about midnight!!! He was terrible, it felt like he really wanted out and then because he had wiggled so much he gave himself hiccupps and I had to feel those for a further 15 minutes! little sod! Oh well I am at work now (just) and face another day of hell. My life would be nearly perfect if it wasnt for this stressful job. It really gets me down sometimes. Oh by the way, saw the midwife yesterday and yes, you guessed it, he is BREECH. I know I know, there's still loads of time for him to turn but if he is anything like his dad it may take him a while to figure it out (sorry James!).... Fingers crossed! I also packed my maternity bag yesterday. I thought its best to be prepared. I hope to pack Charlies bag at the weekend. Scary huh!?!

Wednesday 14th November - 32 weeks Whoooa - 32 weeks now! It aint half going quick! lol. I am ok I spose, apart from again the stresses of work and back pains. I find that I get bad sciatica pains and they start from my butt and work all the way down my legs. Its horrid and I get them if I so much as walk round a supermarket or especially after lying down. I think I have officially got to the stage now where I am struggling abit. Trouble is, the clients at work just dont understand. Everyone wants to move house before Christmas and they will do anything they can to make sure they do - including speaking to their solicitor like shit! lol. Sorry I had to vent its just that its 7.48am - I am not due to start work till 9am and I am here already about to begin another day of hell! Other than that I am ok. Still suffering the watery discharge thingy, still worries me but it hasnt got any worse just stayed the same. Some days its worse than others... Charlie is still beating me up lots and kicks me all over. I cant ever work out what way he is lying really - I mean, one minute I am feeling kicks low then high then to the left and right - I just dont know! lol. Next midwifes appointment is 2 weeks Tuesday so am looking forward to that and hopefully, by then he will be head down! Oh well best go, back to the grind....

Friday 23rd November - 33 weeks 2 days Firstly., I would like to say I am SO sorry girlies for not being online thanks for your comments its nice to be missed. To to be quite frank I have had the week from hell!! Basically, Sunday night I came down with the worst tummy bug I have ever had. It was sickness and the whole other thing... I was sick for 12 hours every half hour and by Monday midday I thought I was just going to pass out - in fact I nearly did on my bathroom floor!! My husband also caught the bug and we were both so ill. This has lead to us having the whole week off work as it really hit us hard, me especially being pregnant and all. I am at work today but I am still not feeling well at all and my tummy still wont let me eat properly. I was sooo worried about Charlie. So there you go - here I am now half a stone lighter but Charlie is absolutely fine so no worries there! Trouble is, I have now come into work with over 100 emails in my inbox and i just dont know how I am gonna do it. Oh and to let you know I think Charlie turned a couple of days ago as I no longer feel his feet in my groin but round my ribs now!! I cant be sure but I am keeping my fingers crossed! Is anyone else feeling really uncomfortable with it though? I feel like I have constant indigestion (that may be something to do with the bug though) and my ribs are being squashed and I am breathless - its horrid!!....

Its abit blurry, but heres my GUT at 33 weeks + 3 :)

28th November - 34 weeks. Hiya, another week has flown by. It has been a horrid week cos I havent been well and only really started to feel better yesterday. Now I have my appetite back which is good and I am starting to feel like myself again. The pregnancy though is taking its toll a little bit. Sleeping is still a nightmare and when I wake up my hips hurt and back hurts real bad. Getting dressed is also a nightmare cos of the expanding bump I cant put my socks on properly but I know we are all in the same boat so it makes me feel better! Oh and I can officially say 3 more stretch marks have appeared right at the front of my gut. This is because his lordship has gotten alot bigger cos I saw the midwife yesterday and I am measuring a week ahead now - so he has got fat and given me massive pink stretchies in the process!!! Also, the GOOD NEWS is that he has turned head down - phew, I was right! I new he had as I felt hiccups low down the other day! She felt his head down low and said he is quite deep....not engaged yet but deep.

ITS SO TRUE! lol

5th December - 35 weeks Well its now 35 weeks. Wow. I am knackered this morning. Had the worst nights sleep ever last night. I couldnt lay on my sides because my hips and back was killing me, the wind was howling, Charlie was sooooo active it felt like he was going to fly out of my belly (it was the most active he has EVER been at 4am!!), James was snoring and I was too hot. So to be honest I didnt really stand much of a chance sleeping did I?! Its 8am and I am at work, cream crackered but I only have today and tomorrow to go and I have got a long weekend coming up as I did really well and saved a couple of days annual leave until now as I new I would be struggling by this point! That was the best idea I have ever had!!! Other than the usual moans and groans I am feeling ok but am tired of being preggers now and I want Charlie to come out.

12th December - 36 weeks. I am at work now, struggling abit I must admit, and feeling the strain but I am carrying on cos I know that a week on Friday is the end. Horray! My job is still bloody awful cos all my clients still want me to click my fingers and magic them into their new homes in time for Christmas. They just dont take no for an answer you see. My back still hurts real bad and I have been feeling quite sick. Baby really kicks me very hard yesterday he did the hardest kick ever and it really made me jump out of my skin! Those hard ones hurt I am sure he has brused me the little brute! I now have a new name for him - PIGLET! lol. Oh well on a lighter note little piglet will be delivered in 4 weeks time which is a nice thought I am looking forward to him being around. Take care guys.

19th December, 37 weeks. Another week has come and gone. I am getting scared, so many of you guys are ready to pop or have popped now its a sign that the end is near!! I am ok, still struggling with my back and I have just woken up this morning with a full blown cold but I would rather that than what I had a couple of weeks ago I spose..I caught it from the MIL!!!...I am gonna dose up on the vitamin C and any other natural remedies I can get hold of! I am annoyed with my midwife care though. It says on my NHS booklet that from 28 weeks onwards you should see the midwife every 2 weeks. I havent seen mine since the 27th November!!!! Then from 36 weeks you should see the midwife every week. YEAH RIGHT!!! I was sposed to see the midwife today for a home visit but she cancelled and I am not seeing her now till next week - 27th December so thats a whole month between appointments! i feel so let down, I mean, I know it sounds silly but I could have all sorts of problems and she wouldnt even know! Apparently my midwife is off sick but thats no good! If I am off sick from work someone covers me shouldnt that be the same case with the midwife? Anyways sorry enough of my rambling on a lighter note I finish work on Friday thank god!! horray. I am so looking forward to it but I am scared as well as its gonna be wierd not being at work......

24th December - Christmas Eve!

No real reason for updating but why not eh?! Well I am finally finished work now and dont plan on going back till May so horray the excitement begins - and the scariness is taking over now. I am soooo scared! Its cos I know that works out and Charlie is gonna be bustin out of there very soon! lol. I am looking forward to tomorrow, having my mum and her other half over and I have bought a huge turkey but mum is gonna help me as I can barely bend over to the oven! lol. Seeing the midwife on Thursday 27th (first time in a month!!!!!!!) and I am looking forward to that as I would really like to know how big or small I am measuring etc and just get generally checked over for reassurance as my last appointment was way back in November! Well anyways I had better go, and soon get some sleep as santa will be here shortly! lol. MERRY CHRISTMAS to you all xx

27th December - 38 weeks +1

I saw the midwife today. All was fine, baby is right way down and growing perfect for dates but he is not engaged..... Midwife reckons he will weigh around 7.5lbs which is great news! phew. So I am really happy but am sooo glad I am not working. i feel like an elephant. I had to lie on the floor today while midwife done her examination at home, and I couldnt get up off the floor, and when I got onto my knees my left knee gave way and it really hurts now it felt like it popped out of place under my weight! gross huh?? The only thing is I am unhappy as that'l be the first time in a month I have seen the midwife and the last time maybe! yes you read right the last time... she wont be seeing me now unless I go overdue and need a 'sweep'! Thats it - I am on my own now! she told me to ring the hospital if I get an signs of labour etc and thats it! On a lighter note, you're gonna be proud of me, cos I am proud of me, I went to the Next sale today and yes I got there for 5am and got loads of bargains but let me tell you its hell! I started eat 4.30am and I tell you what ladies are soooo ruthless when it comes to getting a bargain, I mean, I could have gotten into labour on the shop floor and nobody would have noticed! lol. I feel so tired though cos its now 7pm and I havent slept so I cant wait for bed tonight. The sad thing about it is that I got loads of lovely Next clothes, but of course I cant ge into them at the moment!!!!!!! It was very hard buying clothes in anticipation of me losing the weight again but I guess it is a good goal to aim for eh?

Oh one last thing, I was amazed when the midwife actually told me today that if I dont want to be induced and dont want to go until 42 weeks then I should have 'as much sex as possible'! Yep it was her own words I couldnt believe it. James was present at this appointment so of course he is well chuffed! lol he says that at least he can feel useful for something now! ha ha xxx

Hi guys. Its New Years Eve, nothing has started for me yet, no BH or

anything... boooo hoooooo I am starting to get desperate now, especially as they wont even consider inducing me till I go 2 weeks overdue. That sucks!!! Happy New Year to you and labour dust to you all! xx

2nd January - 39 weeks. I am feeling a little low today. Its hubby's first day back at work after the Christmas break and I am abit lonely, I dont know what to do with myself I am so used to working! I am hoping to potter around today, and I am gonna put babies things all in the right places, as at the moment all his stuff is in his room but I think now is the time to move the moses basket into the bedroom - I gotta get used to it being there, right?! I know I should use these times to relax so thats what I am gonna try and do, I am just used to earning money thats all. Still absolutely no signs of labour and I reckon he is gonna be a late baby....everyone, please, wish me some labour dust - I need it right now! x

9th January - DUE DATE 40 weeks. Well girls, I asked for some labour dust. If you did wish it on me its not flippin working so do it again please! lol. As I was saying, nothing happening here, piglet is well and truly snuggly in there and beats me up as and when he feels like it. I hope he comes soon! I am feeling so uncomfortable, but I am not the only one, there are many of us who are due now and are suffering. One new-ish problem to report is that I have the poops. Yep, I well and truly AM NOT constipated, I am the complete opposite. Its doing my head in. At least I am not at work now, I cant imagine my poor colleagues having to put up with me - my husband James is a saint bless him! I am now starting to try other methods of eviction. Sex hasnt worked, I am trying some pineapple later, and I walked for miles at the weekend up really steep hills but that didnt work either! urgh...come on Charlie!!!!!!

15th January - well ladies I am officially the last woman standing. Its really lonely on this website now everyone has had their babies and I am pleased for you all but am definately jealous! I can only say that I do have some news myself. I saw the midwife this morning and she said he is now fully engaged. I have been getting bad period cramps the past few days on and off and this morning i felt a really sharp pain just before I saw midwife and i think thats where it all happened. I am officially walking like I have a coconut between my legs! lol. Midwife guesses he still weighs around 7.5lbs and is quite happy. The bad news is - they wont do a sweep until the 25th January!!!! I am gutted so I really want him to come now. My mum told me that both me and my brother both engaged the day before mum went into labous so I am hoping I will take after her and I will go into labour in the next 24 hours. Congrats to all of you new mummies I cant wait to see pictures of your little babies and I still need you to wish me more labour dust! God its lonely on here now.......

16th January - 41 weeks - Well I reached the 41 week mark. I had really hoped I wouldn't be sitting here typing this but hey. The cramps I had yesterday have diminished and i feel absolutely fine. I am gutted. I want my pains back!!!!!!!!! I cant even feel him low down anymore but he couldnt have un-engaged so perhaps I am just getting used to it. You can probably tell I am feeling depressed today. I think alot of it is down to the fact that I am only taking maternity leave till May so the later my little fella arrives the less time I will be spending with him :( Oh well come on Sam think positive, one way or another, he will be here by the end of the month....groan

18th January Well I thought i'd update today. Reason? Nah no reason really but every day feels like a new week so I thought I would do it. lol. And I am bored ot of my mind. Last night me and hubby went to KFC and I had a Chicken Zinger Meal with extra spicy hotwings (5 of them). My mouth felt as if it was on fire afterwards. Then I ate pineapple and we even tried (sorry TMI) sex as well which wasnt easy but it was for a purpose!!! Now ladies....what more can I do? Today is Friday which means its housework day so this afternoon I am gonna be hoovering, scrubbing and changing beds etc. If that dont work then I have just gotta accept that my little one is quite happy and snug in there and aint going nowhere!

Charlie's Birth Story

Well yes Charlie has now arrived into the world at 7lb 15oz. I got what I asked for last Friday and all the housework, walking, driving over bumps and (sorry TMI!) sex finally paid off as after a day of doing all those things I went into labour!!

On the 19th January (overdue) in the early hours of 2am in the morning I started contracting. It woke me up.(I went to bed at midnight that night so was soooo tired! and thats before labour started!) I had a show and realised that this was it! I put up with the contractions until midday on the 18th January (I couldn't go back to sleep it hurt too much), as they started getting alot more painful and closer together. Me and hubby arrived at the hospital, where I was just put in a room and left until about 5 or 6 in the evening! That was when they checked me and i was only 3cm dialated. I was quite upset as this had meant that I had been contracting for more than 24 hours and I was only 3cm!

They then proceeded to break my waters (In my view, this was a mistake because once they do that then baby has to come out quite quickly) in the hope that it would speed things up, and sadly it didnt do that and also he had meconium in the waters so I had to be continuously monitored and so did Charlie and I wasnt allowed to get out of bed. After another hour of bad contractions they checked me and i was not even 4 cm - I was gutted! I felt so degrading every doc and nurse had their hand up there (excuse the pun!) It was then I asked for pain relief, so I got a little injection in my thigh which didnt work. It got to 9pm in the evening and I still hadnt gotten anywhere. Then all of a sudden my contractions stopped. Just like that. They then gave me the awful awful drip to bring on my contractions. Within 5 minutes I was contracting so bad - I hardly had time to breath in between. Oh and I should add that I had BACK LABOUR! URGH! I started crying and my poor husband James was also crying cos he didnt know what to do to help me. Eventually after an hour of this agony, I was given an epidural (which I never wanted to have to have) but it was wonderful. I was then told I could have a sleep until I was dialated enough to push! I was so happy, and I went to sleep at about 2am and slept till 5am. It then came to 6am on the 20th January and I was told I could push, it was great cos I could see the contraction monitor go really high but I felt none of it! lol

Ok so I started to push...an hour went by....then another hour, and he wasnt coming out. I felt him move down, and so did the midwife, but he was not coming down anymore. When I pushed he sort of got stuck. They dont know why, cos my pelvis isnt small and Charlie wasnt a big baby. I was so upset. The told me I would have to have a cesarean. I was devastated, i never thought it would happen to me. I begged them to reconsider, as Charlie wasnt distressed, but they said he would get distressed if I kept trying to push. I asked whether they could use ventous or forceps, they said no as his head was still to high. They then proceeded to shave me (how degrading) and make me sign a consent form and whisked me into theatre. I was crying so bad. I didnt want a cesarean i was so scared of what might happen to me.

I got into theatre and hubby was given his outfit to wear. They then started the op. This is the bit which makes me heave. I hated it, I hated every moment of it. It felt like someone was 'washing up in my belly' and then I started to feel sick and was gagging over a bowl while they were operating. Then I started to feel light headed and I could hear lots of noise and people shouting out that I was losing blood. It was awful. I was crying asking what was happening to me. I really thought I was gonna die. Anyhow, Charlie was born, I was able to look at him whilst nearly throwing up and losing blood, then hubby was told to leave with baby while i was sorted out. Luckilly they stopped the bleeding and I was stitched up. I met hubby and Charlie in the recovery room whilst I stillw anted to be sick and I barely new who he was. I couldnt even bring myself to hold my baby I felt like I was on another planet. I felt so degraded, exhausted as all in all it was a 32 hour labour ending in this. I felt useless as lets face it, there was no real medical reason why I had to have the section. I will never know.

I spent 3 days in hospital. I was told I was extremely lucky I did not have to have a blood transfusion, (it was close) as I lost 1200 mls of blood.

I feel resentful as I feel there was more they could have done to prevent me from having to have the section. Baby wasnt distressed and the trouble was I wasnt getting that much help and encouragement when I was pushing, as the nice midwife I had left to change shifts. I was then left with a midwife who I didnt know and didnt help me. Because of the epidural, I blame myself because I couldnt feel what was going on so I didnt know how well I was pushing or not. Perhaps I didnt push hard enough. I will never know.

I always wanted 2 children and I simply do not think I can go through it again. They decided my fate for me. The op was the scariest horrid moment of my life and I am scared if I have another baby it will happen again. Or it might not, I will never know.

I am sorry to waffle, I needed to vent this out, and if there is anyone out there who has suffered a similar experience as me then please get in touch!!!!!

I would like to say though that I absolutely love and adore my baby Charlie, he is ABSOLUTELY gorgeous, and was worth every bit of the trauma. I hope I get over it cos one day I am sure he will like a baby brother or sister!!!

---

Ella Louise Manning Sex: girl Born: 19 February, 2010 Age: 1 years & 361 days Birthday in: 4 days Starsign: Aquarius Development: See the 24 months page. Biggest achievement so far: -

Ella's Pregnancy Story :-)

11 w 4 days!

14 weeks

20 weeks

24 weeks

28 weeks

31.5 weeks!!OMG

34 weeks + 6 - am sooo HUGE!

38 weeks OMG my maternity clothes dont even fit me anymore :-(

40 weeks!!!! dont even go there! lol

Well OMG here we are again, cant believe I am back here now. I spent many hours on this site when I was pregnant with my son, Charlie, and I am sure I am going to do the same this time around!

Found out I was pregnant on the 29th May 2009, I was 2 days late and did a test and got a faint BFP!!

Feel free to message me, I love making new friends. I made a really good friend the last time I used this site and she is the best - here that Zoe you are the best!!! So I hope to make more friends this time around too. ☆

I am going for a private scan this Saturday the 11th July as I am desperate to know alls ok and whether theres more than one baby in there! will update soon :-)

Update: All was fine, one baby in there, all healthy and measuring correct for my dates, good heartbeat of 163 beats per minute, am very happy :-)

22nd July 2009 - I went for my hospital scan today and all was good, but they changed my due date so am now due on 6th February 2010. Baby was amazing x

5th August 2009 - Got my screening test results back for downs sydrome and its low 1:27,890 yippee

20th August 2009 - am nearly 16 weeks and its my 4th wedding anniversary today. Had a VBAC appointment at the hospital which went well yesterday, was told I have a 70% chance of having a normal birth this time and I think I am going to give it a go. It transpired the reason why Charlie wouldnt come out last time is that he was lying back to back and that explains my horrendous back labour as well. Feel great that I now know what happened to me. Oh and I find out the sex on Saturday!!!!! :-)

22nd August 2009 - Had my scan and IT'S A GIRL how exciting! I am soooo lucky I really do feel like the luckiest girl ever. We are deciding on a name but we love and have always loved Ellie Louise Manning so think that one will probably stick :-)

2nd September - Last night baby started moving quite abit more, I have been feeling flutters since I was 15 weeks but now I can feel quite abit and I let hubby hold my belly and he could feel her moving too :-) how exciting

20th September - Ok so today I had my 20 week ultrasound and I am still in shock! It was confirmed that she was definately a girl which is a relief as we have bought lots of pink stuff, everything looked normal which was even better BUT she is a big girl. The ultrasound tech came out after the scan and asked me how big Charlie was last time as this girls very chubby and she is very very tall, in fact she is right at the very top of her height chart already. I mean, James is 6 ft 5 and I am not short, but I have wondered why I am so huge this time around, I was showing so early and have more stretch marks already and I am just 20 weeks! Now I know why! lol Charlie was measuring average in my last pregnancy so something tells me she is gonna be a big tall baby so I am not going to buy anymore newborn clothes as I can be sure she wont ever fit into them!

29th September. Ok so today I am not so happy as I was last time I blogged. Saw midwife today and she told me that my BMI is 33 this time and the cut off is 30 which means I will have to have a blood glucose test on the 10th November :-( She said that because baby is measuring big as well I would need that anyway :-( Then I got to work and checked out my blood test results which she put in my notes and I am concerned as they say that 'Possible Alpha + thelassaemia carrier and/or iron deficiency. One major peak with HBA.' To ME that doesnt sound normal and now I am worrying. I just hope that she would have told me if there was anything wrong with my blood thats all. I need to have faith in the NHS! she did tell me though that I would be carefully monitored at the end part of my pregnancy if baby is big and I would need regular scans...

8th October 2009, 22 wks +5. I finally saw bubs kick from the outside today :-) how exciting. She is starting to move alot now and its a comforting feeling. Cant believe how fast this pregnancy is going!

7th November 2009 - 27 weeks! aaaah 3rd trimester here we come. Feeling ok, apart from aches and pains and usual discomforts. Not looking forward to my glucose test on Tuesday I hope I pass :-(

15th November 2009 - 28 weeks :-) Well firstly I wanna say CONGRATULATIONS to Zoe who is preggers and due in July. I am so pleased for you girl well done :-) so thats the first bit of good news, the second lot of news is that I passed my horrible glucose test so thats fab. It was horrid and I fainted when I had the bloods done cos I was so weak and hungry! LOL Got a midwifes appointment in 2 days so I am looking forward to knowing how big bubs is measuring. will update soon :-)

17th November 2009 - Saw midwife. Urgh she was useless. Was kept waiting over half an hour and it was a midwife I had never seen before as mine was off sick. I had to prompt her to do all the usual checks she really didnt seem to know what she was doing! Anyway alls well, baby is measuring a week ahead so its not too drastic, midwife says thats ok for now, they will keep an eye on me but they only get concerned when you measure more than 2 weeks ahead. So thats fab. Bubs is head down and lying on her side :-) I was supposed to get my maternity grant form today but again she was so rubbish she didnt have a form for me so I have got to go and collect one in a week so I can get my health grant. At the rate I am going I wont get one before I pop! lol She told me not to worry about my blood tests, I was slightly anaemic last time but I am fine this time, alls well. Wont see a midwife now properly until the 15th December....

Saturday 21st November, 29 weeks :-) Had abit of a scare yesterday and the night before. Bubs was hardly moving and I was worried - my midwife told me to monitor baby movements carefully as any change could mean she is distressed. Anyway so I phoned the hospital daycare yesterday morning and they told me to drink loads of water, give it 2 hours and if she doesnt move much then to go in. Thank god I drunk the water and half hour later she came to life. She has been a little mover ever since. Maybe she was just having a lazy day but boy she got me worried!

Monday 30th November. Well I have had a less than perfect couple of days! Its like history repeating as Charlie was ill on Friday, it was horrid, he couldnt stop being sick and then Saturday night me and James came down with it, a really horrid tummy bug! we were both trying to sort Charlie out whilst dashing to the loo every 5 mins it was bloody awful. Anyway, I still feel rough today so havent gone to work, I havent tried solds yet and feel really weak! But when was 32 weeks preggers with Charlie the same thing happened to me I am beginning to think I am very unlucky! URGH

Sunday 13th December, 32 weeks +1!! Cant believe where this time is flying, its nearly Christmas! I am officially huge, I had to shop for a pretty top to wear at my Christmas party at work at the weekend and I cant believe I am a size XL in H&M Mama!!! :-( thats just awful, I have a midwifes appointment on Tuesday, cant wait to know how big I am measuring as I am really massive, I am like I was full term with Charlie and I am panicking she is gonna be a ten pounder!!! only time will tell I suppose....

Tuesday 15th December, 32 weeks +3. OK so I saw the midwife today and I am measuring 34.5cm, so just over two weeks bigger than I should be. She didnt seem too concerned and just said I was borderline and they would keep an eye on me and if I am even bigger next time then I will have to go for a late ultrasound. Feeling peed off though as the last woman I saw told me that they allow you up to two weeks either way and once you go over that they check you out. This woman didnt seem to care, but whats new with the goddam NHS!! I have a funny feeling they are gonna let me get huuge before they do anything about it this time around, but I am just trying to think positive and you never know it could mean bubs comes 2 weeks early :-)

26th December 2009 - Merry Christmas everyone! :-) 34 weeks preggers today and feel like I am 41 weeks without a doubt! lol everyone commented on my bump over Christmas and I cant remember a single person who hasnt actually said 'you aint gonna last all the way!' lol well I hope they are right, as the rate I am going I wont be able to get off the sofa if I get much bigger. We had a fab Christmas, had my family round and visited family too, Charlie was spoilt rotten and got loads of presents. I have just started to bounce on my pilates ball now as my midwife recommended I do it to help baby get into a good position - I hope she is right ;-)

9th January 2010 - well cant believe I am 36 weeks, shit I am pooping myself! Next week I will be considered full term. Had period like pains in my back last night and hoped it was all about to start but no such luck. Todays been abit bad though as had tummy cramps when I stand up I think she is in a funny position and is lying on a nerve or something I dont know. We havent got a car at the moment which is freaking me out as in case I go into labour! My dad said he will let us have his car but I am nervous as his car is not even 6 months old and I dont want my waters breaking in it! lol hopefully we will find one soon and this snow will stop its so icy out there I am too scared to walk in it! got my appointment at the hospital Tuesday which is the big appointment with the consultant where we will make the ultimate decision, VBAC or C-Section, and she will tell me how big bubs is etc... will update then. Oh and Zoe - will be thinkin of you Monday hon let me know xx

12th January. Well I am currently finding it hard to type as I am so upset and gutted!!! went to the hospital to see who I can onyl describe as 'Hitler'! lol she was the consultant and she discussed whether I would like a VBAC or c-section. Basically I layed down and she checked my tummy only to find she is now breach, not completely breach but 'oblique' so lying across my tummy, her head is under my rib. Its wierd cause I was in bed this morn and I told James it felt funny on one side of my tummy and I wondered whether she was in an awkward postion. Call it mothers instinct! Not only that it falls into place as you will see from my blog above I was getting pains in my tummy a few days ago and I thought she had gotten into an awkward position then!!! so I was right! Theres a chance she could still turn but its unlikely. So I have a c-section booked which I didnt want. I am keeping the date for the section a secret and I am only telling close friends and my mum and dad. I just dont want to tell the whole family and then be bombarded with phone calls etc the day before I go in. I am petrified and have been sick twice today already!! Things happen for a reason I suppose, but I am just gutted I wont even get another shot at a natural birth. To be honest the consultant told me even if I did try and go natural my chances are slim anyway and if I couldnt push my last baby out I would have a hard time with this one as she is bigger... watch this space and keep all crossed for me

18th January - 37 weeks plus 2. Well things havent been so great since the hospital last week. I have had a virus thing which has made me feel like poop, it all started after I went to the hospital and since then I have had sore throat and chills etc and now James has it too :-( I hope Charlie doesnt get it as bless him its his birthday in 2 days I really want him to have a fab birthday and we are taking him to Jungle Jims and going out for dinner etc so I cant wait to see his little face bless him..hopefully he will be ok

21st January - well Charlie is now 2, he had a fab day and luckilly he has been fine and not caught any of James germs. James is on antibiotics as he has a throat infection but he is feeling a little better. Jungle Jims was brill Charlie loves it there and I tell you that boy has some energy! lol. Not sure why I am updating today, I guess cause I have 12 days to go till my section and I am getting a little nervous now! Got my pre-op appointment next Wednesday and I dunno what they are gonna do there but I am scared of that as well. I think they will just make me sign loads of consent forms and talk me through the op :-( YUK cant believe my little girl will be here in 12 days, its crazy stuff. I cant wait to meet her but sadly my excitement to meet her is overshadowed by the horrible cesarean that I will have to have first, I am so scared something will go wrong during the op, I know its unlikely but it could happen, I am freaking out!

26th January. Saw midwife today, baby still breech, no change there, heartbeat fine and she wished me luck in my upcoming c section and told me she would see me when baby is here! Cant believe how fast this is all happening, this time next week I will have my baby in my arms, that is providing she doesnt turn in time. Midwife said it is very unlikely she will turn now, she is well and truly wedged! she also reminded me that should I go into labour from now until the date of the section that the hospital will want me in 'pretty sharpish'! er...thanks for that...

27th Jan - ok so went to my pre-op appointment today. Am truly freaked out. Had to go through all my medical history, have more blood taken and was told what I have got to do the night before the op (not allowed to eat or drink) and given instructions when I need to take my pre-med tablets etc. I have got to get to the hospital for 7am which is a nightmare as it means that we have somehow got to ask someone to have Charlie really early in the morning! I asked when my op would take place and was told hopefully it should be first thing as I am the only planned section to take place that day, Thats good news. This means it will all be over by 9.30am hopefully!! She ran through the risks with me, I feel sick at the thought of it and can you believe I was given the option whether I wanted to be put to sleep or not! I was very brave and said no I would be awake - only because the risks to me and bubs are even higher if I opt to be put out. It was a hard thing to say but I would never forgive myself if something went wrong all because of my sellfishness. Oh well this will be my last update now before I go in, I will be too scared to write anything else over the next few days. Now I just want to concentrate on being mentally able to cope with the c section and I want to enjoy these last few days as a family of 3. Wish me luck, I am soooo scared!

Monday 1st February-ok so I said I wouldnt update before the c section, but I feel like I have to as I need to vent! I am so scared, I feel sick constantly and am crying all the time. I cant wait to meet my little girl but the thoughts of the op etc are really scaring me, I am scared that I will haemorrage like last time and I am scared that bubs will forget to breath. Please pray for me that all will be ok, and bubs will be fine and I will be fine. I couldnt stop crying tonight when I was saying goodnight to Charlie and he must have wondered what I was on! lol I am just scared something could go wrong during the op and I might not see him again (I know I am so morbid!!!). Perhaps I am just totally overreacting here and the hormones are getting the better of me I just really wanted a VBAC this time and I am gutted I wont ever have a natural birth. I guess though that in the end all that matters is that me and bubs make it through safe. I dont intend on having a 3rd child so I have just got to think I wont have to do it again! lol oh well best go, its gonna be an early start for me, got to get up at 5am, have a bath, take a pre-med at 6am and be at the hospital for 7am! urgh I wish she wasnt breech!

2nd February - ok so what an emotional rollercoaster I have had over the past 24 hours! Got up at half 5am, got to hospital for 7am. Had a long chat with the consultant and anaestetist, got prepped for theatre (yeah had to wear a hospital gown and get prodded and shaved 'down there'!!) went through loads of humiliation, James got changed into his 'scrubs' was just about to go (I was in tears) and they did a quick scan on me to check that baby was in fact head up, and guess what, she was cephalic and is head down ready to go!!! Me and James just stared at each other as we were told this news. The guy who scanned me said 'heres her head' and there it was at the bottom of my tummy. They asked me how I was told she was breech in the first place. i told them the consultant told me she was definately breech and I was told it was her head under my ribs, when actually it turns out it was her bottom! They had made a mistake, as I know baby hasnt changed position in weeks so she hasnt turned she has been head down all along. i was then faced with the decision - proceed with the c section or abort it and try for a VBAC when the time comes. We couldnt make the decision, it wasnt fair. Then a really nice guy came in, he was one of the top dogs and the one that was about to do the op on me in the first place. He told me discipliniary action would be taken against the consultant who told me baby was breech, as she should have ordered a scan (her room is even opposite the scan room so it shouldnt have been difficult!) and he apologised for the mistake. he then told me what he thought. He felt that as I got to 10cm dialiation last time, I stand a good chance (80%) in achieving a VBAC.He told me that c sections should only be performed with good reason, they are major operations and in my case there was now not a good reason for it to be performed, other than I had had one before. Bubs is head down ready to go and I am fit and healthy. He said if I dont try I would never know. Obviously he cant guarantee my VBAC would be successful but he told me my body has done it before and should 'remember' what to do. He said 1 in 5 VBACs are not successful however he has a good feeling I might be fine, with good labour support should be OK. Me and James then decided to abort the operation and walk away. It was te hardest decision ever and I hope it is the right one! As you can imagine I am feeling pretty emotionally drained now and still cant believe they got it so wrong. Blood crap hospital and doctors! I hate them for doing this to me! Now I just want to concentrate on my labour and I hope it all goes ok and I can have my natural birth that I so desperately want. Ok I need to stop waffling now seriously! LOL

6th February 2010 - due date!! Well I am still here, I thought bubs was gonna come last night as I bounced on my birthing ball and when I got off my tummy felt all hard and I had alot of downward pressure down there, it was really bad! But then it went off and I was gutted. I went out with my mum yesterday as well over lots of speed humps and country lanes, I am eating pineapple, drinking rasberry leaf tea (yuk!) and having sex occassionally (yuk! lol) but so far no luck.,,, just gotta keep trying I suppose. I am cleaning constantly, and I mean constantly, really I NEVER cleaned this much with Charlie it was crazy, my floor is gleaming and my house smells lovely :-) Now just need a baby to put in it :-) I am gettin wound up though as my mum is constantly texting me and other family members texting me every day, and I am like, I will tell you when I have had her! aaargh I am very nervous about the birth and want it to be over, I hope and pray that this time it doesnt end up in cesarean, but at the end of the day I guess whatevers best for the baby is what matters ..

9th Feb - Term +3. Ok so I am so stressed out right now, things are just not going right in this pregnancy and its really getting me down. Saw the consultant today, but a different one as they wouldnt let me see the one that *&^%* up before! lol and she tried to do a sweep, which was uncomfortable!! Anyway, she couldnt do it, my cervix is still too high and baby hasnt dropped yet, although she is def still head down. She told me that I have to come back in a weeks time to be induced. However, if my cervix is still too high and 'unfavourable' then it would be a definate c section, as I have had a c section before they cant induce me when baby hasnt dropped properly yet. I am gutted. I need to go into labour naturally within the next week or else I could be induced or have an automatic c section....why is this happening to me! My mum said to me today that I should have just had the c section last week but I am not listening to her, at the end of the day I wanted to avoid major surgery and if I can give my body half the chance to do that then I should do so. To make matters worse and to add to my troubles, they have now found protein in my urine, and I have got to call them on Thursday to get my results as its a sign of pre-eclampsia. GREAT someone shoot me now!!! lol (no seriously...)

Oh and just to add, I asked her to guestimate her size, and she said she couldnt, and that she feels 'average' for my height (5'7) I am sorry but I aint bloody stupid, she is obviously big and the woman didnt wanna tell me that!

15th Feb - 9 days overdue, ok so its the night before they try and induce me :-( I am so scared, not looking forward to it at all. They might not be able to induce me anyway if my cervix is still unfavourable but if it is then they will give me the hormone drip and get things started. It could all end in an emergency c section though I am trying to look positive. If they cant induce me then it will be a c section shortly afterwards - but I am gonna try and delay it as long as poss as I desperately want to try for a natural birth this time - otherwise I would have had my baby 2 weeks ago! lol.... wish me luck plllleeeeease ladies, I am desperate for all to be ok, I hate the fact that I have got to get up tomorrow and not know whats happening until they give me the verdict in the hospital. I just want this baby out as safe as poss and for me that would be by VBAC. Hopefully the next time I update she will be here x

16th Feb, term plus 10. Well things had a happy turn today, went to the hospital and the consultant checked me to find I was easily 2cm dialated and my cervix is nice and soft and he even felt the top of the babys head :-) I am so happy, so he did a 'really good sweep' which let me tell you felt AWFUL! It hurt like hell and he virtually had his whole hand up there, god it hurt. BUT hopefully its done something good and he said that he hopes I will go into labour within 24/48 hours. I have been crampy ever since but thats it. If not, I have got to go back on Friday when they will definately break my waters and get things going, but he said he would rather wait at this stage as my body seems to be doing it on its own and he only wants to intervene as necessary, and I am totally happy with that. OK so hopefully the NEXT time I update I will def have baby here :-)

18th Feb, term plus 12, well still no baby :-( tomorrow morning at 8am I will be in the hospital where they will break my waters and if I need it give me the dreaded hormone drip to get things going. :-( I have never had such an emotional rollercoaster than what I have had these past few weeks. Its been hell. I now cant wait to hold bubs in my arms. She has one more night to come naturally if not it will be induction tomorrow. Did have some strong contractions last night which lasted for an hour but then they stopped. Please let it be tonight. Wish me luck and if I have to be induced please let it all be ok x

Well Ella Louise Manning arrived at 11.37pm on the 19th February after a successful induction and horrendous back labour but she arrived naturally and was a whopping 9lb 14!!!!! She is gorgeous and I am so proud. Full birth story will be added soon.

First Trimester
1-4 weeks-(1st month)- Completed!
5-8 weeks-(2nd month)- Completed
9-13 weeks-(3rd month)- Completed!

Second Trimester
14-17 weeks-(4th month)-Completed!
18-21 weeks-(5th month)-Completed!
22-26 weeks-(6th month)- Completed!

Third Trimester
27-30 weeks-(7th month)-Completed!
31-35 weeks-(8th month)-Completed!
36-40 weeks-(9th month) - Completed!

Ella's Birth Story

OK so Ella was 2 weeks overdue and I was induced at 2pm on the 19th February as she wasnt showing any signs of coming. They broke my waters which hurt like hell and I had to use the gas and air to get me through that bit! lol Then they left me 2 hours and I was walking round the hospital trying to get contractions started. I was having mild contractions and tightenings but nothing major. So at 5pm they started the hormone drip to get things going which I was dreading. Within half an hour I was getting moderate contractions and I was gutted as I felt all the pain in my back again so new that I was gonna have back labour which scared the shite outta me!!

Anyway things got more intense and my contractions really hurt in my back. I got through a whole canister of gas and air as well so they told me after! lol I tried everything to help myself and used the birthing ball alot and moved around alot. James was great and the midwife showed him how to massage my lower back mid contraction. I have never experienced pain in my back so bad, I was screaming that I couldnt do it as I seriously didnt want an epidural as I know that that contributed towards me having to have a c section last time. It got to 9pm and I couldnt take much more and they checked me and I was 5cm and in active labour. I made it till 10pm crying and screaming and finally told them I needed an epidural as the pain felt like my back was being broken in half. They checked me and I was 8-9cm and told me there was no way I could have an epidural now as it was too late! At around 10.45 I all of a sudden got the urge to push and I pushed for 45 minutes till she was born. It was a difficult delivery and two midwifes had to manipulate her body out as she came out shoulder first! They couldnt believe how big she was and when she was pulled out they said wow she is a biggun!! She was placed on my chest and I couldnt believe I actually gave birth, with no pain relief, to a nearly 10lb baby (she was 9lb 14!!) it was crazy. I had a second degree tear and I had to have a spinal and go into theatre to be stitched up. I also lost 900 mls of blood and was badly anaemic so spent 2 nights in hospital and had to have a blood transfusion :-( I am home now and she was totally worth all the pain, she is gorgeous. She seems to sleep during the day and be more awake at night but hopefully that will change soon! Its really hard work having 2 kids to run around after especially as Charlie is going through the terrible twos but I am sure it will get easier. I am over the moon x

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