Hello! I am a 26 year old American living in the UK for the past three years (husband is English) This is our first child and we are super excited if not a bit nervous (ok, Im nervous, hes not really) We will be moving back State side (Annapolis MD) after the birth , will not have been home in two years! Im just trying to take in this whole experience in and try to enjoy it.

14 weeks-

New EDD- American Independence day! Although it probably wont be born on the day , this makes me very happy. It will be born in the UK so if we could just make it to the 4th that would be a nice compromise :) And then I could always tell hubby how "American" our baby is!

In other news, completely lost appetite , dont quite understand why, especially when eating was one of my most favourite activities pre-pregnancy. A shame really.

Also got a doppler! Couldnt find heart beat or anything for 20 mins , then changed position and -viola! It was the first time Id ever heard it, doctor has never tried. I was so excited I had to tell some one. As Im still on Christmas holiday from school and my husband was at work (Although I eventually called him as well.. too much time on my hands), I called my Dad in America! He was thrilled. What a day..

15 weeks

Whhoa! What an emotional week, and not for anything in particular other than hormones. There was a man on the high street dressed up as a clown asking for donations for a children’s charity yesterday. I stopped to give him 50p, and started tearing up over come with the feeling that my donation and his time were going to save the world. I’m not letting my husband see me with tears in my eyes, I know he would understand its hormones, but he d still laugh. This is exactly what he did when i cried at the end of “Return of the Jedi” a few weeks ago, and I haven’t let him see me weepy since.

Ive been on medication for PMDD(Premenstrual Disphoric Disorder) for many years now , and was quite concerned that I wouldn’t be able to handle my emotions when I was pregnant, now that I have stopped taking it. I was worried Id become depressed, to be quite honest. Oddly and surprisingly the opposite has happened, Ive been experiencing waves of euphoria every day or so , and no, this is not "oh I’m happy I’m having a baby and all is good" kind of euphoria , this is sucking on nitrous oxide high as a kite type of thing. I figured if hormones can make you feel as shitty as they ve made me feel the last 8 years they are bound to have the ability to make you feel equally the opposite, right?

In other news, I’m finally starting to show! Work pants don’t fit any more and I feel if you are going to wear maternity pants you have to wear your new maternity top too. Then I look in the mirror and start to feel kind of silly that I’m all decked out like I’m 9months when all that there is a little "pooch" in my belly. I just want to hurry up and get my belly so a) it’s obvious I’m pregnant and not just fat b) clothes fit properly c) I can show it off and friends can coo over it.

16 weeks

Well not as great a week as last week, actually been feeling pretty down. I've been doing research today into how much its going to cost two relocate our two cats when we moved and at this moment in time we are looking at thousands of dollars to get them to the States with us. Now, we LOVE our cats. I mean our house revolves around them and Ive been crying all day because I dont know whats going to happen. Im starting to stress big time about the move , shipping our furniture , our cats , my husband getting a job out there in the States , having NO money once we get there and then of course dealing with all this being heavly pregnant/with a newborn . I cant even set up a nursery here because its going to cost so much to ship what we have already, WITHOUT baby! So that means I cant really go shopping for any baby stuff or anything . Then after giving birth I have to pack up an entire flat for a trans atlantic move. Because I wont be working and making any money, we have to leave the UK as soon as possible or we wont be able to pay our rent here. Some times I get over whelmed whenI think of organising the birth the move and the money in a six week time span. And now the thought of leaving our cats come into the equation and its just too much. Ive once again gone off food and have been really depressed the last three days.

17 weeks

Well feeling better, Been teaching Buddhism to my year 8s so Im all zenned out and relaxed . Its funny trying to teach them to meditate. The kids dont know Im preggers. If you were walking down the street and saw me you wouldnt know Im pregnant. Even the doctor said "wow you dont have much of a bump at all" hehhe. It was at that point I decided to stop obsessively looking at my belly in the mirror every morning and night. I got me a little pooch at 15 weeks and since then , nada. Ill grow when it decideds to.Still cant tell if Im feeling the baby move or if its just growing,moving muscle twinges. Theres so much going on down there how can anyone tell whats baby and whats your intestines relocating? I guess its more fun to say Its baby so Ill just do that. One more month till big ultrasound. I sometimes get the urge to go into London by myself and get a £100 ultrasound so I can find out the sex. OMG would Matt kill me. he ehe he

19 weeks

Think Ive been feeling the baby kick, not quite sure though. That being said as a first time moms are we really sure about anything? Although Im almost alf way itstill feels like its taking forever. Im just mad because I have to wait until the 29th of Feb to get our scan. Ill be 22 weeks. Im trying to tell myself its better to wait because then they can see everything better because the baby will be a little bit older.

My husbands Birthday is Monday, we are going out to dinner tonight at my favourite Spanish restaraunt and seeing the movie " Juno" .. Really looking forward to thatIts not often he agrees with going out and spending lots of money. I find this time of the year in the UK quite difficult. Its quite cold and gray. At home February is tolerable because you know that next month ,March, you will have a few warmish days. Here, you dont get those until May...if your lucky.

And so my belly monitoring continues.. think growth and movement.

19 week update

yes yes yes!! Def been feeling the baby move all day! Its amazing. Ive started a whole new chapter in this pregnancy!

20 weeks

Been a pretty eventful week, off on school holidays again (gotta love the Europeans for all this vacation time) Ive been hacking up a lung for the past week and a half. I have officially become that person who asks " is too much coughing going to hurt my baby?" I feel stupid even writing it. Husband has taken off from work this week too, so we can enjoy a thrifty holiday of "relaxing" =doing nothing exciting therefore saving money. I have been able to meet up with a lot of friends so that’s been good.

Been feeling the baby lots each day. Its just too cool to think that for so long I felt NOTHING then boom! Every day virtually all day long its wiggling around in there. To be honest at first the movements un nerved me a bit. It all felt quite low and I thought it felt like it was bouncing off my other organs, it freaked me out a bit. Ive got used to it now but still change positions when its giving my bladder a good pounding.

Ah ha! and this morning! Matt FINALLY felt the little one! God, that was great. I think he was getting a little jealous of my constant movement updates. In his English understated way I could tell he was really pleased.

And to top it all off, our team won the pub quiz last night.

22 weeks (just)

Im 22 weeks today and we just had our scan. ITS A BOY ITS A BOY ITS A BOY! Oh, Im so excited . I was honestly more concerned that the little guy was healthy than finding out what the sex was. I could barely eat or sleep all this week. Can people help being natural pessimists? Well everything looks good, except he wouldnt get out of his position so they couldnt see his heart in the detail they wanted, so I get to go back next week. Not only do I get to take off work (I know its horrible) but I get to see him again as well. The whole thing felt a bit rushed and I even felt bad asking to know the sex because there was a big waiting room of people waiting behind me , but hey thats the NHS. I ve only ever seen my proper midwife once this whole pregnancy and I didnt see a doctor today. Is this normal? I dont know. I d love to form some kind of relationship with a midwife or doctor. Ive got my blue folder that I take to all my appointments with all my info , and whoever is working that day looks through it, does their thing for me and thats how it works here. Ok, Im not complaining anymore . Its free healthcare,right? Im just spoiled by American private healthcare (to which Im verymuch looking forward to going back to ;)

23 weeks

Well well 23 weeks . We have officially decided to call the baby Hunter Kai . Im not too keen on the fact that last names used as first names is trendy now, and that Hunter is like number 54 on the most popular names of the last few years, but hubby and I cant agree on anything else and I have loved this name for a few years now. Matt wants his name sake to be Hunter S. Thompson. Yeah, that ll be fun one day explaining to him he was named after a crazed, drug fuelled writer. We also agreed we wouldnt tell anyone the name till he was born , well that went out the window about three minues after we found out it was a boy. I think Im actually starting to feel comfortable with the pregnancy. I know Im more than half way through but now that the baby is almost viable I feel like Im actually going to have this baby . Im finally accepting that after all this there WILL be a baby. Im letting myself get excited without unbridled neurosis hanging over me, this is healthy. This is the way it should be.