I have a NEW page on here as "Melissa and Sean" b/c I ran out of room on this one! Feel free to check it out here

Its nice to meet you! My name is Melissa, and I live in Boston. I have 4 kids from a previous marriage, ages 17, 16(in August), 15(also in August) , 12(October). My husband, whom I married last year, has one son , 17, who also lives with us. We have been together for 9 years and are due with our first baby in August -- on the 16th. With 5 kids, and one on the way ( a BOY!) life has certainly been, and continues to be(!), an adventure.. Especially since I found out I'm having a c-section on the 1st of August due to a broken hip and pelvis (fell down a flight of stairs 2 months after I had my last baby!) Oh, and did I mention I have a bulldog too?

Fun Birthday Facts

Your baby's birthstone will be Peridot or Jade (Married Happiness) Your baby's Astrological Sign will be Leo Your baby's Flower is Gladiola or Poppy (Orange, Red and Light Green) Your baby will be born in the Chinese Year of The Pig This time next year your baby will be 50 Weeks Old! Your baby will start kindergarten in 2012, be old enough to drive a car in 2023, finish high school in 2025, and will graduate from college with the class of 2029, give or take a year. Can you imagine?

Pregnancy

Your name?: Melissa

Fathers name?: Chris

Are you still with him?: yes, got married last year (together for 9 years)

Were you trying to get pregnant?: kinda, in a way. We both wanted a baby tho, just not sure when

When did you find out?: Feb 4, 2007

Were did you find out?: at work!!!!

How far along were you?: 8 weeks

What was your reaction?: Shock! Thought it wold have happened in year 2 or 3

Who was the first person you told?: my boss (lol)

How did you tell the father?: Called him up at work

What was his reaction?: as shocked as i was!

did you have any morning sickness?: Quite a bit

What are your fears?: the delivery. I have delivered 4 without drugs, vaginally. Because of a boken pelvis a few years back, have to have a c-section this time. Im scared to death!

What are you most happy about?: Im excited because I always knew i wanted one more before I turned 40.

Did you want a boy or girl?: I had no preference but I know its a boy

What did the father want boy or girl?: a girl, since he had a boy from a previous marriage

Do you know what your having?: yep, a boy.

Do you have a name picked out?: yes, its Sean

How much weight have you gained?: 15 lbs as of 6/7/07

Have you felt the baby move?: yes, but i wish it could be all the time!

When you have the baby Are you keeping the baby?: of course. I adore kids.

Do you plan on a natural or medicated birth?: I have to have a c-section, so ill have an epidural.

Are you scared about labor?: only the epidural since i have never had drugs.

What do you think will be the worst part of labor?: the not knowing...

Who will be in the delivery room?: My husband

Are you having the birth videotaped?: If I can..

Do you think you will cry when you see the baby for the first time?: I can't imagine NOT crying!

What do you think the fathers reaction to the baby will be?: Hes going to be jumping out of his skin!

How do you think family and friends will feel?: They're nervoud because of all of my pains, but they're excited too as they know this is what ive wanted for a long time.

The first picture is at 13 weeks; the second one is at 18 weeks and is him looking straight at you, and the third one is my favorite, the one of his left foot, also taken at 18 weeks. I can't wait for my next ultra sound in late May.

Saturday, April 7, 2007 Last night was awful! I was sitting on the couch and I had the whole shortness of breath thing happen. At first it was just a little uncomfortable, and then as the night when on it was horrible! I ended up going to bed but it was hard to lay down because that just made it worse. So I ended up getting up several times during the night before finally falling alseep around 3am. I had some pretty bad nightmares too. Does anyone else have this happen to them?

Wednesday, April 11, 2007 First off, I'd like to say Happy Birthday to my wonderful husband. He does so much for me.. Yesterday, I had something for lunch that gave me food poisoning.. I had a fever and I felt sick and vommited all afternoon and all night, literally. It stunk. I must have been up 10 times last night. And he always asked me if there was anything he could do for me, or get for me. He rubbed my back. He rubbed my belly. He gave me tons of hugs. He listened to me as I whined and complained. lol -- that poor guy. But hes ALWAYS there for me. And to think after being together for 9 years he still opens door for me, buys me coffee at D&D eventhough its WAY out of his way and brings it home for me just because he knows it always puts a smile on my face, and he never asks for anything in return. He cooks me dinner, and helps me clean the house.. he takes the kids out and lets me rest when im not feeling good and even tucks me in at night when i go to bed earlier than him. I am SO lucky. Happy birthday Chris... I love you.

Thursday April 12, 2007 - I went back to work today, and I did ok. Usual stresses and stuff, but atleast I wasnt in the bathroom all day. The last 4 pregnancies I had I worked up until the day I delivered, but with this one it seems that as the months go on, I feel like I wont be able to work up until that day. I think its because im older. My others I was in my early 20s and now that im 37, i just dont know if i can make it till my due date working! Does anyone else feel like this?

Friday April 13, 2007 I checked my weight today and it turns out i've gained 9 pounds. Though it could have been 10 or so, I think I may have lost a bit when I got that bout of foodpoisoning a few days ago. And I was worried because I had read about Lysteria, and how it can hurt you and your baby, and of course, being the always so worried me, I called the doctor to see what they thought. I told them that I had some symptoms of Lysteria (god I HOPE thats how it spelled) the vomitting, chills, and diarrhea, and they said that if I hadnt had it in a day or two, and if it only lasted a day or so, then it most likely was foodpoisoning, and not Lysteria. So since Im doing better, and havent had any of the symptoms, then theres no reason to get bloodwork done. But im paranoid. I had to call just to make sure. I wish I could just relax sometimes, and not worry. I know it does more harm than good, but sometimes I cant help but worry. I just want everything to turn out good, and the unknown kills me. Hope everyone had a lucky Friday the 13th.

Monday, April 16, 2007 Well I think we finally decided on Sean. I love that name. oh, and I checked in with the doctor and they said that since I started to feel better, they were not going to consider bloodwork for lysteria. They said if i truly had that, then I probably would NOT be feeling better. I trust their judgement, since they've been very caring towards me so far. I had a bit of a panic attack last night. I worry over EVERYTHING! I worry whether the babys ok, whether Im ok, if Im going to be able to handle another baby, you name it. Thank god Chris is there for me. I don't think I could do it without him.

Saturday, April 21, 2007 I had my 23 week apointment on Thursday and they said all was well. I told them how concerned I was that I had only gained 9 pounds so far, and they told me that my measurements were right on target. they also said the heartrate was on target as well.. They told me I need to stop worrying! But I cant help it, im a natural worrier! Like this morning.. I woke up with a really awful stomache pain that made my belly feel really tight. It was such a cramp! I kept rubbing my belly and then I noticed that I hadnt felt the baby move in awhile.. So I kept rubbing A. trying to rid the cramp, and B. trying to see if I could feel the baby move.. I got a slight movement, but not too much more. My husband keeps telling me that hes sure everything is fine. "Babies sleep ya know." he says. I think he's right, and im sure the doctors right. I need to relax. I need a vacation!

Monday, April 23, 2007 Well, as usual Chris was right.. This baby has been non stop moving since Saturday night. Yesterday, he moved so much I thought I was going to find a foot hanging out between my legs. We bought a new Ocean Waves CD and I played it into my baby headphones (resting on my stomach) and he loved it. he made them move all over. it was kinda cute. I have my final ultrasound on the 23rd of May, so one more month to go! I am so excited! Chris and I went shopping this weekend, and I broke down again and bought more baby clothes. I saw the cutest outfit and it made me melt. Everytime I see these cute little clothes I cant help but to tear up knowing that soon I'm going to have a baby. I never thought I would have the joy of having another one, and sometimes it just overwhelms me..

Saturday, April 28, 2007 Wow, I can't believe I went a whole week without updating my page! I guess i've been to busy looking at everyone elses page and commenting them! Well it doesn't matter its all good! Right now im in my 24th week, going to be 25th on this Thursday, and i'm really looking forward to it. I should have about 15 weeks to go on that date, but since Im scheduled for my c-section a week ahead of time, looks like I'll have 14 weeks to go. Its getting down to the wire! I have a lot of movement, and a lot of stretching pains, but I realize that its all part of the quest, so im trying not to stress about it, as most of you know i stress about everything! Anyways, I told my doctor about the massive heartburn I get every night. it sucks. She told me to take Zantac 150 before dinner and maybe one before bed if I truely needed it, and so far it's helped. Of course that body pillow I have helps a lot too. Only problem is it leaves no room for Chris in the bed. Heh. I've been reading more and more about c-sections and how if its done before the woman has a chance to go into labor the babies lungs dont get a chance to expell any of the fluid in their lungs and it leads to breathing problems.... Have any of you who have had planned c-sections, and who havent gone into labor before the scheduled date, ever had your baby experience breathing problems because of this? I'd like to hear from you!

Friday, May 4th, 2007 - Thank god that week is over! working right now stinks. I have a job where I have to walk quite a bit during the day. And it seems the more i walk, the more cramps it gives me so I have to constantly sit down! It's challenging to get things done, that's for sure. But this week just seemed to drag on. Thank god I can finally have a day off tomorrow! But I have to be up early for my kids to take their SATS. So I gain a baby and lose two to college. What a scary time!

Sean must be excited that its friday too.. hes been kicking me all day almost as if he was doing a count down to the time we went home, because now that i'm here he's calmed down. lol. He must sense my emotions! oh wow! I just realized I have less than 95 days till my c-section! Gosh I hope I make it! All that walking at work might put me into an early labor!

Monday, May 7th, 2007 - Well yesterday was my birthday and it turned out nice. I reached the big 3-7. My kids helped me clean the house and do yard work. My husband made me a nice dinner.. I had a long hot shower and a good night. Who could ask for anything more? I have my next doctors apt scheduled for the 24th and my next ultrasound scheduled for the 23rd. I cannot wait! Hopefully they won't tell me that the made a mistake on the sex! Last time (when i was 18 weeks) they said "hey its a boy! oh wait a minute im not sure... yeah its a boy.. ill have the doctor come in and give you a 100% answer in just a few" doctor comes in and scans around for about 5 minutes just to double-check the measurements and says "so what are you going to name your little girl?" my husband and i did a double take and then i said 'well the technician said it was going to be a boy' and so he looks again, and says 'Yeah shes right.. it is a boy!" So hopefully Sean will stay a Sean and not a shawna!!!!!!!

Friday, May 11th, 2007 - YAY! Im so glad its Friday! Now I have three days off to look forward to! Im really starting to hate my work. Eventhough my bosses know im pregnant they still expect me to do the same workload. I try to explain to them that its hard for me to keep up with things, they only add more onto my plate. I think they should go easy on me considering I never call out and im never late to work. I fill in for others when they need time off... But I feel like I never get any slack in return. Wonder what it'll be like for them when I leave to have this baby. Yesterday, my dad sent me a birthday present.. it was a gift card in a large box full of baby clothes. Heh I wondered whose birthday it was... mine or the babies. Thanks dad!

Sunday, May 13th, 2007 - All my kids helped me out in the yard and cleaning the house today. I got cards from all of them too! I was so happy! I hope everyone of you had a HAPPY MOTHERS DAY! - You all deserve it!!!

Friday, May 18, 2007 - Well I have today off, tho I usually don't because someone at work needed to take tomorrow off so we traded days. Unusual for me, but i've never had any problems with her, so I figured I'd do something nice for her. I haven't been on here in a few days and heres why: I had a massive panick attack on Monday because I had not felt the baby move all day. I was lucky if I felt him move 5 times. I tried everything from orange juice and sugary snacks, to laying down on my left side and playing with my belly, along with other assorted stuff to get this guy to move. Needless to say, he moved 5 times and that was it, from 6am till 5pm. Finally I decided to call the doctor and they sent me to the hospital so I could have an NST test (THANK GOD I asked a woman on here what an NST test was, so i wasn't worried when they called me in for one! Im GLAD I joined this site!!) So I go in, and they strap me to monitors and i lay there silently and still nothing. Then my nurse comes in and starts talking in this heavy english accent. The baby started kicking right away, and she says "He's moving!" and i said "yeah must be the english accent! I hope youre here when I deliver!" He moved everytime she came in the room and started talking. we all thought it was funny. I joked with her that I wanted to take her accent home with me. But the baby is ok and im happy. Turns out he was moving I just wasnt feeling him. The nurse said sometimes you dont always feel all the babys movements until in your 28th week and after because it isnt until then that hes filled up your womb and you can feel more of what hes doing. Basically she said the fetal movent count doesnt start until later. I remembered my last baby and doing the fetal kick count, but i didnt remember what week it started. turned out its next week. thats why I panicked. typical me. And I did get an ultrasound as well, just to make sure everything was ok and they confirmed Sean was indeed a Sean and NOT a shawna. LOL - Have a good day everyone!

Sunday May 20, 2007 - Well today I had a good day; I was finaly able to go and pick up the ottoman that my husband bought with my glider rocker this past week. God I love that thing. It helps me when I cant lay down because of all the acid reflux I get. Its also good when i need to keep my mind off these darn braxton hicks I keep getting. Sometimes I get them for hours and other times i only get them when i have walked for a long period of time (like when im at work) -- speaking of, work had been sucking lately. They never let up on me; they still expect me to do more and more as more and more people quit or dont show up. I wish I didnt work there. I thought I could change things, but the management doesnt give me the time of day. All I can do is write people up when they dont do things their supposed to do, but they know I cant fire them. it sucks being a lead. Anyways, all my managers do when i ask to talk to them is pat my belly and say 'awww isnt it cute?' and walk away. They never take me seriously. Maybe they'll take me seriously when I tell them to take their job and shove it when I leave in a few months. On a better note, Sean is doing good. My mothers planning on having a shower for me in July sometime, and im looking forward to it. more on this later....

Wednesday May 23, 2007 - Well I just got home from my 28 week ultrasound apt. and all looks good. Sean is definitely a Sean! YAY! well *I* knew he was from the start.. Hes measuring a little big for his age. They think that when hes born hes going to be in the 8lb range which Im happy about.. I have another ultrasound apt in late June, so ill keep updating. Tomorrow I have my 28 week drs apt where they give me the yucky sugar solution. I can't wait! NOT! In the mean time here's some new ultrasound pictures that we got yesterday..

This is a picture of Sean at 28 weeks, just hanging out with his arm over his head..

And this is a picture of Sean hugging his umbilical cord..

Friday, May 25th, 2007 - Well I just got back from my 28 week doctors apt (it was supposed to be yesterday, but had to be postponed till today because my doctor had a family emergency) and everything went great! I had my sugar test (boy that stuff tasted nasty!) and had more blood drawn because of my bloodpressure problems. Sean is measuring fine, and weighs in at 2.12lbs. They tell me that based on my ultrasound pictures it looks as though im going to make it to full term. Hard to believe that you can measure your cervix through an ultrasound (yes it hurt like hell when they pressed down on that wand with the ultrasound but they have to do what they have to do i guess.) So Im pretty happy with that! I also mentioned to the doctor about that really sharp pain ive been having that runs from the bottom of my bellybutton to the bottom of my pelvic bone. They said that its my muscles stretching and opening up and it hurts like hell. But atleast I know its ok to have that pain. its always good to have your fears put to rest. So all in all im quite happy that things are progressing like they should and that im going to carry this baby to term. WHEW!

Monday, May 28, 2007 - Happy Memorial Day everyone! Well last night was one of the worst nights i've had thusfar. As many of you may have read, I broke my pelvis about 2 months after I had my daughter back in '95. I had gone over to a friends house to drop something off, and they lived on the second floor so i had to climb about 20 steps. They wern't home, so I decided to drop off what I had brought, and leave. On my way back down the stairs, i didnt see the black ice on the top step because it was covered by fresh snow. I slipped on it, went up in the air, landed on the 5th or 6th step down on my back, and slid down to the bottom step where my knee buckled and my leg was stuck straight as my foot got caught on the bottom railing, and forced my leg up breaking my hip and fracturing my pelvic bone. Since there was no one home, I had no one to yell to, so I got up (took me about 20 minutes) and got into my car which was a 5-speed. I ended up driving myself to the hospital (about 10 minutes away) in shock where i honked my horn next to the entrance until an attendant came out. it sucked. Needless to say, they cant put a cast on you, so they ended up giving me some tylenol with codine and sent me home. I walked to my car (this was like 5 hours after I got there) My now EX husband drove me home and he went in the house telling me he wasnt going to help me in (long story) so I eventually got in the house and it took me two months before I was healed enough to be able to walk down a hallway in less than 1/2 hour. At any rate, I dont know if my pelvis ever healed correctly because they cant do surgery on it, but now that im pregnant, in my 28th week, Ive got this baby whose growing inside me and pushing against my pelvic bone and it feels like its breaking all over again. oh my god the pain was a 12 out of 10 last night as it took me awhile to get from a shower (thought the warm water would help and get the baby to move -- no such luck) to my bed. I cried for over an hour as I tried to get the baby to move from whereever it was. it took awhile, but eventually he moved and i was finally able to breathe again. i'll tell you, im not looking forward to my last month knowing this baby is going to be settling into my pelvis. i'll keep you posted.

Wednesday May 30th, 2007 - well I got the results back today for the 28 week bloodwork I did last friday.. The bloodpressure bloodwork came back normal (the creatine test for high BP- my bloodpressures been steadily going up) so theres no need to worry about preeclampsia just yet.. The Glucose test came back at 128. Not bad, but not great either. The nurse who called me to give me the results told me that the cut off for normal was 129. Not too sure how I feel about this one yet. I'm going to have to talk more about this with my doctor when I see her on the 6th of next month...

Monday, June 4th. 2007 - Oh boy, another night from hell! Yesterday I went to my father-in-law's house to visit and have lunch. On the way there my pelvis was bothering me because the baby had decided he was too comfortable to move. The pain was about a 6 out of 10. When we got there I didn't do too much, just sat around because I didnt want to walk too much knowing that ALWAYS makes the pain worse. By the time we left there I was really hurting. It took me awhile to get back into the car but I did it. And half way through the tip I couldnt take the pelvic pain anymore. I started crying. When we got home it took me forever to make it into the house and up the stairs to my bedroom. I figured that if I tried to empty my bladder I might feel a little of the pressure go, but no, it didnt work. My husband helped me get undressed, and into bed. God bless him, for the amount of crap I put him through. So its about 5pm and im in bed and the pain is NOT getting any better. It actually getting worse. Im about a 12 out of 10 now, and I cannot move without screaming. I call my husband into the room and he sits on the bed to see whats wrong. The pain is unbearable now. I tell him I cant move and ask him to pass me the phone, which he does and I call the doctor who tells me to make it to the hospital however I can. So my husband again, helps me up while I am crying nonstop. "I HATE MY PELVIS" I scream to myself. I wished I never fell down in the first place. This sucks. I get only short and a shirt on, and head downstairs to the car. its now 6pm and the kids are getting ready for school in the morning. We tell them to make their own dinner (they're all teens mind you) and out the door we go. I couldnt stop crying the whole way to the hospital. We get to the front enterance and my husband runs in to find a wheelchair and brings it out and helps me into it. I waited at the door until he parked the car. He wheeled me up to OB and the wanted an urine sample so I practically crawled to the bathroom. I came out and my hubby helped me onto the bed where they monitored me for about 40 minutes. I had a few contractions here and there but nothing major on that front, but boy i hated that monitor being strapped around my abdomin. The doctor comes in and i describe the pain to her. she asks me where it is, exactly, and i showed her on her pelvis. She smiled. After telling here everything I could think of, she says 'ok, youre not going to like this. I don't think that anything has happened to your pelvic bone, but it sounds like the muscles that are in front of your pelvis bone have completely split apart... and thats ok because thats whats supposed to happen, but with your previous pelvic fracture its going to hurt worse, because now you have nothing supporting that area. Unfortunately, you're going to have this pain for the next 10 weeks until you deliver. Its not going to go away.' I remember saying to her 'gee, I really like you as a person, but im not liking you as a doctor right now!!! - can't I take anything for the pain?' She says, 'Well I can give you some pain killers, but with any drug you have to use it cautiously.' and she perscribed me percocet. I don't like taking ANY meds. As a matter of fact, I went natural with my 4 previous deliveries and had NO meds. Not even afterwards. But in this case the pain has been so astronomical it feels like my pelvis really is splitting apart. I took one when I got home and within a 1/2 hour the pain was down to about a 4 out of 10. I went right to bed and slept all night. a deep sleep too. and I needed it. All the energy i expended yesterday really made me feel awful. This morning, as time is going by the pain is slowly returning so im planning on staying on the couch. Im only going to take the drug when i absolutely need it. The doctor seems to think that as long as I take it only when i have to have it then the benefit should outweigh the risk. Ive got my fingers crossed that shes right.

Thursday, June 7th, 2007 - Well I went to my 30th week appointment today! I can't believe that I only have 9 weeks to go! Well ok, maybe I can believe it. It feels like 9 years sometimes! My blood pressure was better than it has been. It was 114/66. We talked about my pelvic pain, and how its all muscular not the actual pubic bone itself. Made me feel better emotionally, but not physically. I still have to wear my pregnancy belt for support, but I've been disabled from work because of the intense pain I get when I walk for more than a 1/2 hour. So it looks like im on bed rest for the remainder of my pregnancy. In a way im relieved, because I wont have to fear walking for hours and being taken to my car by co-workers because I can't move by the end of my shift.... but on the other hand, im depressed because Im an active person and for me to stay on the couch for 9 weeks just makes me feel like crap. I feel like a baby. I feel like im not doing my part to help out. Sigh.

Any ideas?

Friday, June 8th, 2007 - OH WOW!!! ONLY 2 MONTHS TO THE DAY TO GO!

Sunday June 10th, 2007 - only a little more than 2 weeks until I get my next ultrasound.. I cant wait! Especially now that i'm going to be home for the rest of my pregnancy. Sometimes I feel like its lasting forever! I never imagined what women on bed rest had to go through because I was always so active during my last pregnancies.. now I know. Im going to go stircrazy. Needlepoint, anyone?

Wednesday, June 14th, 2007 - Well tomorrow I start my 31st week. The cramping in my lower pelvic region comes and goes but i'm dealing with it. Im getting a bit depressed tho. Its hard being on bed rest and not being able to get out of your own way. I've been trying to get a little exercise here and there but im exhausted. Why can't I be 20 again?

Thursday, June 21, 2007 - I have my next doctors appointment tomorrow at 3 and im sorta excited... im at 32 weeks today, and with my next ultrasound next friday, I feel like the end is finally in sight. At my last ultrasound they said that their may be problems with the baby's cord and that they'd be able to check on it more throughly at my next appointment, so maybe I can finally put that fear to rest. My pelvic pain has slowly decreased the past few days, which kind of worries me. Im so used to feeling pain that when i don't its scary. But the baby is moving all the time, so its not soooo bad. wow, I can't believe that its less than 48 days till my c-section. I'm finally starting to feel at ease with the whole epidural aspect of it.. sigh

Saturday, June 23, 2006 - Well, I had my doctors appointment yesterday at 3pm. When I got there I was having my usual pelvic pain and thought "good, if theres anywhere i want to be having this pain its at the doctors, that way i can show them exactly whats happening" -- little did I know what was going to happen. My doctor takes the usual measurements, does my b/p, takes my urine sample for testing... all looks good. Then she says "well since you're feeling so much pressure in your pelvis, im going to give you an exam." So she does an internal (they've become routine now it seems) and she gets this look on her face. Makes me kinda nervous, but I dont say anything. She looks at my husband and then at me and says "you're 2-3 centimeters dilated, this is a big change from last time, so Im sending you to the hospital, and im going to have them give you a steriod shot because I think you may be going into preterm labor" of course this petrifies me to no end. Im thinking im 32 weeks and im no where near where i want to be when i go into labor. I need to make it to atleast 36-37 weeks before im comfortable! I had told her that i was up all night thursday night - i couldnt sleep with all the pelvic pain i was having. she said that i was contracting and didnt know it because the pelvic pain was overbearing the actual contraction pain.. why me? So i go to the hospital, and when i get there i really am having contractions from my doctor giving me all these internals. they get me on the monitor, give me yet another internal to check that im not further dilated, and keep an eye on me for a few hours. I had three more internals during that time and nothing changed cervix wise, but the contractions stopped. So they told me that women who have a lot of kids can have elongated cervixes that can be dilated on one end but not on the other end. The part where the babies head was was not dilated. So now im back at home and back on bed rest. They decided to hold off on the steriod shot until the next time they check me in a few days. If im further dilated, then i'll get the shots. im a nervous wreck. This isnt how i imagined things would be. I have an ultrasound sccheduled for Wednesday. Hopefully, seeing him will make me feel better. I am so thankful I have my husband Chris to hold my hand, because if it wern't for him keeping me grounded I don't know what i'd do.

Monday, June 25th, 2007 - Well, I was turned down on my disability claim -- it seems that needing to be on complete bed rest and not being able to walk should not keep me from being able to perform the duties of my job. Go figure. So now im 3 cms dilated. maybe that'll do it. I said to the person, "what? do I have to be decapitated to qualify?" Anyways, so I have my next ultrasound on Wednesday and hopefully things will turn out good. Im hoping anyways. Then as of Friday, i have weekly apointments so thats even better. Gives me a more optimistic look at things. Hope you all are doing well..

Wednesday, June 27, 2007 - I woke up this morning with wicked pelvic pain around 5am and soon after more contractions came. They lasted until 12pm when I decided to call the doctor. I went into the hospital and after an hour of monitoring they stopped and i was sent home. I returned for a level 2 ultrasound around 3:30pm (I was scheduled for 4) and met my husband there. Turns out the baby weighs in at 4 pounds 10 ounces, and he's got plenty of fluid so all looks good. I was happy with that. Only 6 more weeks until my c-section!

Saturday, June 30, 2007 - Wow I can't believe June is over already! Its funny how time goes by so slowly in some aspects, and really quick in others. I went to my doctors appointment yesterday for my 33 week check up. I'm still only 2 cms dilated so that's good, and measurements, b/p, etc, are all on target. Im finally starting to see that light at the end of the tunnel. From now on, I get my regular dr's apt. and an NST and an ultrasound at every weeks checkup so they told me to plan on having two hour apts. every Friday. My doctor also said that she wants to re-schedule my c-section for the 6th instead of the 8th of August, reason being, somethings come up for her, and she needs to be on the other side of the country on the 8th. So im kinda happy about that! Im really looking forward to my baby shower too which is taking place next Saturday. yay!

Tuesday, July 3rd, 2007 - Only 32days and change left! I was up a lot the past three nights, but ive been dealing with the pain better. It sure does make it easier when that pain comes to hang in there, knowing that the time is coming sooner rather than later! Sigh... Im looking forward to this weekend, seeing as a lot of my relatives will be coming up to my house for my babyshower. My mom originally tried to put it together but then half way through dumped it on my husband. With him being the only one who works in the house now, its hard for him to put in the time and energy for it, but what im really not too happy about is the way my mothers handled the whole thing. First she told me she was thinking of having one for me, but that she didnt think anyone will come because I have no friends that she knows of. That hurt. My mother and I have never really had a good relationship and I wish that wasnt the case, but shes always been crass and thinks of no ones feelings but her own. My husband is going to drive up to get his mother tonight, and I know shes looking forward to it. This will be the first time she'll see my belly. Funny how she treats me more like a daughter than my own mother does. My dad and his wife will be coming up too and im looking forward to that also. I miss my dad and don't get to see him all that often. Im sure all will turn out wonderful, if someone remembers to bring the duct tape for my mother.

Friday, July 6th, 2007 - YAY! one month from today! I had my 34 week check up today and ultrasound.. .it was so neat, on the ultrasound I was able to see the baby breathe! I saw him take in fluid and breathe it out! I also had an NST and that turned out good too. Then they gave me the strep b swab test, and that wasnt too fun.. but its over with so im happy about that. The doctor and i agreed that neither one of us thinks im going to make it to my scheduled c-section date. She offered me an amnio in a week or two so that we can see how developed his lungs are but I told her id think about it. I only have a few weeks so as long as I make it atleast two more weeks ill be happy. Tomorrow is my baby shower and im looking forward to it.

Sunday, July 8th, 2007- I had my shower yesterday and it went fairly smoothly.. my dad and step mom came as well as my mother, and i was happy that they managed tp keep it together. I was expecting at any minute my mother and father to get into an arguement and i was dreading having to break them up but they did well at policing themselves! I got a lot of really nice clothes, a crib, a stroller, two car seats (one for each car!), a bassinette, a winnie the pooh crib set, a little chair that attaches to the table, and a bunch of other things. I had a great day, but in the end i think i over did it. Normally im in bed all day, and yesterday i must have gone up and down the stairs a dozen times, and by the time everyone left last night i was in tears because of all the pain. I ended up having contractions for hours, and when i called the dr. she told me i needed to lay down, relax and take my pain pills and see if that helped. around midnight things calmed down and i fell asleep. Ive been laying down a lot today... too many cramps. I feel kinda scared now. The doctor told me she doesnt think ill make it to my due date, and now all i can do is sit here and wonder when and where its going to happen.. i have the biggest fear of going into labor before my scheduled c-section date, and having to be rushed to the hospital before i deliver vaginally. In my other 4 pregnancies, as soon as my water broke, it wasnt more than 40 minutes before I was holding a baby. I fear my water breaking and not being able to get to the hospital in time, and then not having my doctor there and having the doctor try to deliver me vaginally with my pelvis the way it is. Needless to say i feel like im on pins and needles. Its like knowing youre going to get hit by a car in the next few weeks, but not knowing when or where. not that im trying to compair labor with getting hit by a car.. its just an example. sigh. i hate having panic disorder.

Thursday, July 12th, 2007 - Well its finally thursday! Im a little nervous though as I have an over the phone court appearance with my ex husband today. Im not looking forward to it (Who would?) but im dealing with it. Its in about an hour so I figured that id sign on here and see what was going on to kind of curb my jitters.

According to my countdown up there I have 23 days left until my c-section, but no one seems to think ill make it to that date (August 6th) so my doctor, my husband and I were toying with the idea of doing an Amniocentesis to see if the babies lungs were mature enough for me to deliver a week earlier, so as to prevent the pelvic pain from getting any worse. Besides, all the pain meds im on cant be doing the baby any good. So I have my next appointment tomorrow, and ill talk more about it with the doctor then. If anyone reading this has had an Amniocentesis, id appreciate any advice you can give me.. thanks

Friday, July 13, 2007 - I just got back from my doctors appointment. the doctor told me there was bad news and that I have group B strep. I never thought that test would come back possitive! I never had it with any of my other kids, but I guess it is what it is. Im going for an elective c-section, so she says that as long as my water doesn't break before that time, I should be ok. In the mean time, my urine sample came back with mixed results so she put me on antibiotics. Oh the fun of it! Also, we discussed the whole amnio thing, and decided against it, since It was only going to save me a week or so of pain before I delivered. So we compromised and she scheduled me for a week earlier than originally planned. So now my new c-section date is the 1st of August. Sigh...

My New Countdown Clock!

Tuesday, July 17th, 2007 - I just got back from my doctors apointment and i gained 2 pounds! Im so excited! I have not gained so much as an ounce for my last 3 appointments and my doctor was getting concerned. She told me last Friday she wanted me to gain 2 pounds by my next appointment (today) and i did! Im now up to 163.8lbs. I was 146.2 when I became pregnant. My B/P was good, urine good, etc. only thing was, is that when i went in for my NST, I had contractions that the machine measured at 112 (with 2 being a baseline) and my babys heartrate dropped down to 108 and had a hard time recovering so now I have to go to the hospital to have one of those 4 hour NSTs there to double check that my placentas working correctly. So im off to pick up my husband from work, and then off to the hospital. And I thought Id have nothing to do tonight. ;)

Well I got back from the hospital, and they couldn't replicate the contractions so they sent me home after about an hour. So thats good I guess... They also gave me the direct line to the hospital if I should need it. Wow. I feel like the president and his red phone. :) Im glad I have only 14 days left to go. I used to be scared about the epidural, but at this point I just want to go and get it over with and be able to hold my little one instead of begging him to get out of my pelvis. I also found out today that because im having a c-section I wont need the antibiotics before the surgery for the group B strep. They would only do that if my water breaks before then. So im keeping my legs crossed.

Sunday, July 22nd, 2007 -- Well I only have 10 days left until my c-section. I feel like the days have become longer... like 24 hours is turning into 48 hours for each day! I don't know how to make the time go by faster! I wish I could get out of the house and do something.. But im still pretty much on bed rest. I would die to be able to go to the stores and walk around.. that surely would make the time go by quicker... or even if maybe I had a swimming pool that I could go and sit down and relax in. But I have neither. I wish there was a way to make time go by quicker!!

Thursday, July 26, 2007 - I had my last doctors appointment today! whoohoo! I gained another 2 pounds, so im happy with that. I have very little water weight gain, and according to the ultrasound, everything looks good. There is enough fluid (im always worried about there not being enough fluid for him), and he was breathing well. I also had a NST and he moved around a lot during that too. Last time he slept through the whole NST and the nurse kept poking and proding me to get him to move. But he was cooperative today and that made it better. The doctor came in, and checked me, and im still 2 1/2 to 3 cms (no change) and im measuring at 38 weeks, so its a little bit ahead. The doctor went over the final paperwork with me on the c-section which is going to happen on Wednesday at 11:30am. Im excited about it! I know that all of the blood sweat and tears will be worth it. Even if it sucks that im still in pain all the time. Speaking of, Yesterday was awful. I had such pain and pressure in my lower pelvis that i thought it was going to crack open. The only thing I could equate it to is feeling as though my body and legs felt like a turkey wishbone. I felt like someone was pulling my legs in opposite directions, and tearing my body down the middle. The pain at times was so unbearable that i had my kids close my bedroom door so they wouldnt hear me screaming into my pillows. Thank god im going in soon.. and thank god for my supportive family. I know how hard its been for them to deal with me.

Wednesday, August 1, 2007 - Ok so its 6:30 in the morning outside beautiful boston right now, and im nervous as all hell. I think im going to go jump in another shower before I head off to the hospital. I have to be there by 9:30 so they can prep me for my 11:30 c-section today. (I would have been 38 weeks tomorrow) -- Ive been a good girl (no eating or drinking after midnight) and as a result I have one of those awful headaches you get when you get dehydrated. Usually I have 1-2 bottles of water every night on and off because I wake up and feel parched. It was hard not to drink all night! So im really quite nervous, knowing that in a few hours im going to be getting my spinal. Needles always bothered me. Then i was told i'd have to be in recovery for about two hours. Hopefully, if all goes well I should be holding Sean around 2pm.. I can't wait until this pain is finally over!

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