I never give names until after the baby is born, so all my unborns get the temporary name of Munchkie!

33 weeks

I had been feeling realy sick and having lots of preterm contractions, which even sent me to the hospital twice. I found out that I have Gestational Diebetes, and now that I'm completely off of all sugars and white flour, I feel 100 times better, and no contractions!!

Planning for another homebirth! I had my first in the hospital with a doctor in, second in a birthing center and third and fourth at home. I loved my experience so much that after my fourth I went to learn midwifery. I am getting excited about the birth although, of course I'm still a bit nervous as most women are.

I love this part of pregnancy, feeling the baby wiggling and hiccuping. Of course it's uncomfortable too, but it's just so precious, I know that I'll miss in later on so I'm trying to savor the moment.

Pregnant hugs to all!

34 Weeks

Things are getting more and more exciting, we're trying to work out things to be able to have a waterbirth - Yipee! I've always wanted to try waterbirth, the ones that I've attended have been so serene but it never worked out for me. My house is really tiny though so we're trying to see logisticly how this will work.

I've been doing a lot of reading, about women who say that their births were not painful - exilartating and intense, but realy wonderful. I'm always on a high after birth and have gotten really good at managing the pain, but it still was always painful! I'm reading that this may be something that we are conditioned to believe. That some women interpret the intense feelings of labor as even pleasurable as they surrender to the power and strength of nature and their womenly bodies. This is something that I want to spend some serious time thinking about. I would love to experience my labor "pains" as rushes of energy that I could welcome and surrender to while feeling happy about. I also want to have more children in the future and want birth to be something that I welcome, not just "manage" to get through.

I've dropped and am having a lot more pressure down below and tons of Braxton Hicks, so labor is really on my mind these days!!

Myspace Graphics- At Myspacejunks.com

36 Weeks

Well, the water birth is out for now, we could maybe squeeze everything in, but it would be so squishy and possibly messy that I decided it would make me more nervous than relaxed and not worth it.

I'm feeling good, finally got everything ready for the home birth yesterday - that was exciting!

My DH is sure that this litle guy is coming in just 6 more days, I don't know - I am mentally preparing to be overdue, that way, anything earlier will be nice, but I won't be too anxious about waiting. I'm actually enjoying being highly pregnant, it's a very special time. The baby is safe a protected and very private, I feel very pretty too - like a tree, ripe with fruit. I know that a lot of women just want to see their babies at this point. I guess that it comes from having 4 others that I am happy waiting and just savoring the quiet and calm.

38 Weeks

Still waiting (I knew I would be). I think that I've about had enough, I'm finally ready to have this baby already. It's so funny, you can spend the whole pregnancy worrying about labor - then along comes the ninth month and - who cares, I just want to get this over with!!!

Being the fifth baby, I have soooo many braxton hicks, literally all the time, and sometimes they are really painful - how will I ever know when it's real? At least I'm planning a home birth, so the midwife has to rush to get to me, not the other way around - I find that so much more relaxing. I just want to make sure that she has enough time to get here, my other labors were really fast (and really intense).

This baby is dure right in the middle of the Jewish High Holy days, I wonder when he will make his appearance? It feels like a very special time to be bringing new life into the world, yet very confusing with all the special holiday activities going on. I'm really out of it this year, usually I'm busy with guests, cooking, planning, and introspection. Now - baby and birth prep - that's it!!!

40 weeks

Still here!! 3 days overdue. Today is my Dh's birthday, he's sure that baby is coming today, I don't feel anything yet. I guess being surprised is all part of the ride. Everyone seems to be having babies but me :-( I met some neighbors last night and everyone was so surprised that I haven't had the baby yet - what are you waiting for??? As if this is up to me!!!

41 weeks

Still, still here and waiting. I keep having cramps, but then they just go away. Each day feels like a year.

He's here!!!

It was amazing!! I am so happy. All the positive thinking really, really paid off.

Sunday morning my midwife called to see how I was doing as she was at a birth pretty close by. I let her know that the same contractions that I was having for weeks were still coming, but they felt a bit stronger and had a bit more pressure. Sunday afternoon I was still having these contractions; they hadn’t faded away, but also were no stronger or closer and not regular in any way. I really, really was hoping that this would become labor as I was already 9 days overdue and it was soooo frustrating - thank to all those ladies who sent me encouragement!!

Sunday evening I stayed up late playing Rummikub with my 13 year old as she was on school vacation and I was sick and tired of waiting for labor to start and couldn't sleep. I finally went to bed at 3:30 am but didn’t sleep well because I was so disappointed that labor hadn’t started yet and in the morning would be 10 days overdue!! How would I make it through another day???

I went to the bathroom at about 4:30 am and had so much pressure that I wasn’t sure how I would walk around the next day if I wouldn’t go into labor. At this point I was so frustrated from all sorts of signs and labor never starting that I couldn’t imagine that this could possibly mean anything.

At exactly 6am I awoke feeling like a little urine was leaking but I couldn’t stop it and a little more started leaking out. As I got out of bed, my water started to flow all over the floor in a huge puddle. I still thought that maybe I just lost control of my bladder, but when I checked it, sure enough, it was all clear and creamy and earthy clean smelling.

My poor husband, Shlomo had worked the overnight shift and had just gotten into bed 15 minutes earlier! He was incredulous though that my water broke and we were actually going to have this baby today!! (He had started calling me his “eternally pregnant wife” and had almost given up that there was really a baby coming out LOL) He jumped up and started organizing things for the birth and reminded me that I had wanted to take a shower in early labor.

As I headed for the shower, I debated whether to wake up Judy, the midwife at 6am or to call her after my shower as contractions hadn’t started yet – I didn’t even have the little ones from the day before at this point. I decided to call her just before I went in since she lives about 45 minutes away and my labors have all been really fast.

As soon as I hung up with her my contractions started to pick up, I was trying to use all the encouraging words, thoughts and phrases that I had been researching all this pregnancy, such as trusting my body, welcoming the baby, and thinking of the contractions as pressure and power that comes to help bring my baby into the world, but leaves no lasting mark or sensation. I was also telling my body not to go too fast, but to wait until Judy could get here and set everything up for the birth. The shower was wonderful so I stayed in a little extra and just relaxed there for a while.

Shlomo woke up the kids, Gitty, age 14 and Chaim, age 9 and told them that I was having the baby today. They made me a hot drink, and told me how excited they were and watched me breath through a contraction or two. Shlomo then got them settled in the other room to watch a movie so I could have the privacy and quiet that I crave during labor.

When Judy got here I was so relieved as the contractions were starting to pick up a bit and I was beginning to get uncomfortable and worried. She was great, we had discussed what I wanted beforehand, and she remembered everything. She whispered encouragement quietly while rubbing my back and made sure that Shlomo knew what was going on as this was his first birth.

I told her that I was really worried because I felt so terrified of labor and it was still quite manageable, but I knew that it would get much harder. I was really scared about how hard it might get and how traumatic it might be. She told me that everyone is scared and I was just being honest about it, but that I was doing so well and that she had full confidence in me. She asked me if I would like to focus on anything or if I liked keeping my eyes closed during the contractions. I decided to try to look at my wedding pictures and think about why I was bringing our baby into the world. This was something different as I had always closed my eyes and focused on relaxing and opening. It worked out really well and was really special; to see our happiness and remember how much we had wanted to get pregnant made me feel stronger and more positive.

Soon though, I had a really strong contraction that I just felt was almost too much for me, I told Judy that I really wanted to run away because now it was starting to get to the part that scared me. The next contraction came though, and suddenly, at the peak, I started pushing!! I couldn’t believe it. How could I be pushing already? This was great!! Judy quickly set up the birth supplies and called Shlomo back into the room, he had gone out to arrange some things. I got into a comfortable semi-reclining position and breathed through the next two contractions.

I had watched a video on u-tube that Judy had sent me that showed a women smiling with joy as her baby is crowning. I announced that although I didn’t feel like smiling, I was going to try. I also kept repeating, “It’s only my babies head, my baby is almost here.”

Judy told me to give a little push and see how it felt, so I did that, and stopped when it started to burn a little. Suddenly she said – “I see the head!” I was so excited that it was almost over. I asked her if I should breath or push and she said to push a little but to be ready to blow for crowning. As soon as the head was out, I reached down to touch my baby and was so happy to know that he was really here. I had to push a little to birth his shoulders and – our little boy was born into the world!

We were both covered immediately with warm towels which had been heating on the portable radiator just outside the room (as it was a warm day). This was something that I was looking forward to, and am so happy that I prepared, it made me feel so caressed.

The pushing was so much easier while smiling, as soon as I started to smile, the pain completely changed, it almost made me laugh, and reminded me that this was a happy occasion.

Shlomo cut the cord, the placenta came out, and within about 15 minutes everything was cleaned up and the baby and I were tucked into be and he was nursing like a champ. Gitty and Chaim were called in and we introduced them to their new baby brother. They couldn’t believe that he was here already and were in such awe, they were almost crying. It was so serene and beautiful.

I only had a very tiny tear where I had scar tissue and didn’t need any stitches. I lost very little blood and now 2 days after birth, I am already walking around normally and feel better than I have ever felt postpartum. He nurses so beautifully that my milk is already starting to come in!

Our new baby doesn’t have a name yet, he will G-d willing receive his name at his Brit Milah, circumcision, which will take place on his 8^th day of life.

He was born at our home in Israel at 7:59am weighing 7lbs, 12oz and 19 inches long.

We all love him so much and are so grateful!!

Tzivi

tzviya.rivka@gmail.com