Having had 2 missed miscarriages (both blighted ovum), I am just waiting for the time of a successful pregnancy with a healthy baby waiting for me!

Dont lose hope xx

3rd July -

I have found out that I am pregnant again. I have had two lots of blood taken to measure HCG, I get the second lots of results tomorrow. The doc said I might be able to get a scan at 7wks - seeing is believing!!

4th July -

My HCG levels have doubled so that's good but not conclusive. I have a scan booked for next Thurs (12th July) when I'll be 6wks. I am remaining very cautious at the moment, I am keeping the mindset that I MAY be pregnant and wont start thinking that I AM until I see that everything is ok. Heres hoping that all will be ok this time!!!

12th July -

Went for my scan today. We saw a yolk sac which is a good sign. They said it measured at 5 1/2 wks, I thought I was 6wks 1 day but my cycle has been a bit longer since my m/c so that doesn't worry me too much. I'm quite pleased actually as both other times there has clearly been NOTHING in the sac! The yolk sac doesn't mean that everything is ok but its a start!

Anyway, I have to go back on 24th July for another scan to see how it has developed and hopefully see more than a yolk sac. I will be approx 8 wks so they should see more if everything is ok.

So for now it's just more waiting! Fingers crossed and we'll see what happens.

I would like to thank all those who have offered best wishes and who have been very supportive - you really help me to get through difficult times and to stay positive - Thank You xxxx

24th July -

Went for 2nd scan today - saw the baby which is great - very comforting and now allows me to believe that I am pregnant! It had a definate heartbeat and measured at 7.7mm which is a little small for my dates but my cycle has been a bit longer since my m/c so I'm hoping that the size is nothing to worry about. For the moment I am just pleased that there is something there with the little flicker which shows that at the moment it is ok :)

My HCG last time were about 8000 which is great cause with the second pregnancy I had blood taken at the same time and it was approx 500 and doubled to 1000 so this time my hcg is well above that.

I have another scan booked for 2 wks time just to make sure that everything is going ok - last time I asked for 1 early scan and wasn't allowed - this time I'm getting 3!!! If things go well next time I will be visiting the midwife - I don't want to go through all those questions for nothing again so I'm waiting a bit.

I'm still remaining cautious and I'm not telling people unless they ask me outright (I couldn't lie but don't want to volunteer it!), I thought I'd be ok once I saw the scan but I doubt I'll actually believe it until I am holding a baby in my arms!!!!!

7th August -

Had 3rd scan today, everything is ok and today we got to see arms and legs and most importantly a stable heartbeat! Size was fine too so thats good. Well thats it for my early pregnancy care now I have been passed on to the midwife and will have another scan in about 4 wks which feels like ages away! Good news for now though - I think maybe now I can actually accept that I should come out of this with a baby!!!

24th August-

Scan went well. Size good, heartbeat regular and arms and legs developing well. The baby was asleep with its arm over its head. She zoomed in and we saw the face which was great. All is going well!! We have bought a doppler (a very expensive one) and so now we get to hear the heartbeat everyday which is lovely. So - 12wks now, scan seen and ok... now we are ready to tell people! Next scan is at 20wks (approx) which feels like ages away! Triple test in a few weeks.

Sickness has calmed down (though not stopped completely) and I am now returning to work (I teach so had summer hols off!) That's pretty good timing! Still quite emotional and moody though so my students better behave!!

Check out the updated pics :)

8th Sep

Just a note of remembrance for my first child lost - would have been 2 today if born on the due date. Gone but not forgotten xx

9th Oct

Lost my last update - don't know what happened there!! Anyway...

I felt some flutters a few weeks ago (I was about 16wks) and now think that I have felt the baby move which is great. I'm 19 wks now and looking forward to that all important scan which I now have a date for - 22nd Oct so I'll soon be finding out what is in there!

Have had some pains over the last couple of weeks but all seems ok now. I had an immense pressure all round my belly for a few days - constant - went to midwife and doc but nothing to worry about and it has clamed down now.

I have had mixed feelings today... the second baby lost was due today. I am sad and can't help feeling that I have been cheated out of time as I should have 2 children now but on the other hand I love this baby so much and if I hadn't lost the second one then I wouldn't have this one! I just hope everyday that all will be ok - even though I am further along I can't help worrying! I have only just actually started buying a few bits. We already had big stuff but I have started with some unisex clothes.

Well - the next update will be to let you all know the sex of the baby so hang in there for that one - won't be long!

In the meantime - spend a moment to think of my angels in heaven please, I hate to think that they are no longer thought about - at the same time I think of them I think of those that I know some of you have lost - they are keeping each other company :)

22nd Oct

Well today is the day - in less than 3hrs we should know if we're expecting a girl or a boy! I'm really excited about that and don't really have a preference, I am just hoping that everything is ok with our baby! Thats the part I'm nervous about - can't help it but scans aren't good times for me - too much association with bad news!

I am showing completely now and have even had strangers ask me if I'm expecting - I'm so pleased that I can answer yes!

I am feeling the baby move lots now so I know it is alive and kicking which is some relief. It feels so wonderful to have him/her move inside me - unfortunately Karl has not had the pleasure of feeling it on the outside yet.

Well in a few hours I'll be letting you all know - watch this space!!!!

All is going well, a fine lively baby - lots of kicking, punching and flipping inside my belly with great long legs and a little something in between!!!

We are thrilled he is ok. Karl was kinda hoping for a girl but we are just so happy that he's alright! I was pleased to hear its a boy as I wanted it to be, would've been happy with a girl but I am over the moon. I can't believe this feeling - I am on cloud 9!!!

I have posted pics on my photo book but not changing my main pic yet. I want to see if I can get a clearer angle with my camera first :)

27th Dec

Well - hope everyone had a good Christmas. We did and our little man has been very very active letting me know that he was enjoying all the chocolates!! I think he is running out of room now but you'd never believe it looking at the size of me! I could lay for hours just watching him jiggle around in my belly - I love it! Karl is getting tired of being kicked in the back when we are sleeping though lol. I have to admit that sometimes I think I want him to be still but I would hate it really!

All is well and now we are counting down the days. We are getting final bits in the Jan sales and getting the room sorted. I can't believe we only have about 10 wks to go until meet him - I can't wait!!

Back to work next week but only for 5 weeks and then I'll be off. Time is passing so quickly - I hope it doesn't start to drag now. Karl is really excited too although it has taken a while for him to actually let himself get into the idea for fear that things would go wrong again. I am so pleased to be at a point that the baby could be born and have good chances. Roll on March though!!

20th March

HE'S ARRIVED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I will be on later with a full update but for now let it be known that Noah George arrived at 17:54 on Monday March 17th after spending 25hrs in labour (21 and a half in hospital) in a full pain relief but vag delivery weighing a very painful 10lb 1oz!!!!!!! Trust me I felt every bit of him but have to say that a fair bit of the labour has escaped my memory due to extreme pain or use of pethidine and gas and air!!

After a couple of days recovery I am home but will give further details (and pics) later.

18th April

Well, can't believe a month has gone by and Noah has changed so much in that time. We are enjoying our time at home together but I can't help but be sad it is passing so quickly. Both Karl and I have quickly got used to being parents and Noah is a dream baby. He is good and contented (though obviously has his 'off days') and sleeps really well at night going a good 6 -7 hrs straight :0)

I have finally gotten round to putting the birth story on his page - it was quite an event, its a shame I couldn't fit every detail (except those you wouldn't want to know) on! I have written up an account of the whole thing (up until the birth so far) for me to keep and I am at about 5000 words! I guess thats what you get for years of study - you learn how to write loads without even realising!

Anyway, I'd like to say a big thanks to those of you that have sent your congratulations and best wishes and an even bigger thank you to those of you that have offered me support throughout the past year, from losing the baby to having Noah, you have been a great comfort so THANKS!!!! I still find it hard to believe at times that I actually have a baby now!!

I'll keep adding pics so keep an eye out :)