BIG 20-week Anomoly U/S on July 30, 2009!!

Little Girl? or Little BOY??

Baby #6 ... A surprise 40th B-Day Gift from GOD!

I thought I was just entering peri-menopause or something ... had no idea that I could actually get and STAY pregnant anymore without medical intervention. Boy, was I mistaken!! At first discovery, I just assumed that this would end in another m/c, but after good blood-work results, I realized this lil one planned on sticking around for at least a while - I still wasn't convinced that I'd successfully carry this baby... Even now, at nearly 18-weeks, I fear for the worst, but pray for the best! I have been on a roller-coaster of emotions - from one end of the spectrum, to the other... In the end, I am calmed by the thought that God chose to bless me with this little one and that ultimately, he will see it through in the way HE sees fit.

I conceived during a REALLY bad time in my life - following a year of domestic violence, which followed my discovery about the TRUTH of who my husband REALLY is! He's NOT a "good" person, or husband - I loved a complete LIE and am heart-broken. I'm still trying to escape that nightmare, and move-on to a better place. I'm learning to stop asking "WHY??" it all happened, because I know that I'll never have the answers - Truth isn't something that my spouse can come to terms with, and I need truth and HONESTY in my life - NO EXCEPTIONS!! I did my best - I was a good wife, in EVERY way, and he just truly doesn't deserve me, or any GOOD woman, like me - surely I will find a good guy in the end, but until then (and, that will be a LONG while!) I have my children and myself to look out for ... We ARE important!!

I pray for each & every one of you to have a VERY healthy & HAPPY pregnancy!! Remember:: Each and EVERY child is a true MIRACLE and GIFT ... as are each & every one of you!! ... no matter the circumstance!!