Thank you for all the messages and kind congratulations. I did not expect that type of welcoming to this page! I am touched.

Reading through your experiences has made me want to share my existence with my husband and how I became pregnant. To start off I am very fortunate. I read about your experiences with the difficulties, I hear your stories on the many many months it took you to be come pregnant and I see your pain and want pouring from your soul. Now I repeat I am very fortunate. I have none of theses things to feel or share.

At the age of 41 I became pregnant too quickly. Imagine. My boyfriend had negotiated with me to end the pill once he asked me to marry him. I wanted on our wedding day. He won, or I let him win, with the assistance of my friends. Let me explain. They all said the same stories. "...it will not happen over night,...It took me 2 years and loads of money to be come pregnant,...” So, I quit the pill and never had another thought, until...

My fiancée (at the time) wanted a quick engagement, I agreed. We settled for a 3 month and on January 5, 2008 we married. BUT STOP, I am jumping.

On November 21, I was not in my plate (as we say in French), He noticed, I felt it and the nagging detail of not getting my period was - an annoyance. My Pilate instructor had enough of me worrying, and really doubted I as Pregnant. But my inner voice said likewise. She explained the pink and symbols. Yelling from her bathroom, I asked her once again to explain the symbols and the color, yelling from within the bathroom. (O my goodness, this can't be) She rushed in and I was on the floor crying, she was so surprised and happy and laughing. I would say the normal reaction of people. All I saw was an unwed mother and walking in the church with a big bump. Now what about all the partying, the jumping of dancing, the late nights of fun, the ... and..

From that point on I was upset, the crying, and we all know about that, the unwanted child growing within. My soon to be husband feeling terrible that I was not happy. However, we never once discussed the possibility of ending this. We love each other and our plan to marry was to bring in children into the safe enviroment of a family with committments to eachother.

But STILL, I was pregnant and I did not want it. Can you imagine, getting a gift and not wanting it. Imagine recieving the love and your god and rejecting it so? The selfproclaimed selfishness for this one last time in my life was so important to me. Being the controlled, beautiful aka skinny, active

This state lasted up until the honeymoon.