August 13, 2008: (4w0d) My husband and I lost our first baby in April of 2008 when we were 10 weeks pregnant. When I went to the doctor, they saw no heartbeat or fetal movement. So now, 4 months later, we are pregnant again. I think we conceived on my 29th birthday!! Just found out today, which would make me due in April 2009. Please wish us luck the second time around!

August 19, 2008: (4w6d) My rheumatoid arthritis has flared up so bad that I can barely walk, drive, open my mouth to eat, or even chew my food. My husband has been supportive, but I am absolutely miserable because of the pain. Being pregnant and having severe joint pain in every part of my body is just depressing. I have not taken my Remicade treatments because of the pregnancy. They say that being pregnant actually causes the symptoms of RA to go into a remission, which was true in my last pregnancy. NOT this one. I am confident that this baby will make it this time, but I am not so sure about myself!!!!

August 21, 2008: (5w1d) I just went to see my OB and all they did was give me my little bag of goodies, but I get my ultrasound next Friday! She said at least wait until after the first trimester if I decide to get back on Remicade. She looked it up in her big book of medicine and said it was category B which is the safest category it can be. I will wait as long as I can. The pain is random and has shifted around. I'm so used to pain that labor will be a breeze (let's hope)...

August 27, 2008: (6w) Well I still hurt like hell, and I cry every morning, but my husband keeps reminding me of why I am doing this. We think that this will be our only child because I don't think I can do this again. I was just thinking about how I used that ovulation calendar to plan on getting pregnant. The 2 times I used it I got pregnant both times. I guess if your cycles are regular it works great if you can just get your significant other to cooperate. There is a small window of opportunity there.

August 29, 2008: (6w2d) I had my ultrasound appointment today and I was very nervous. My husband and my mom went with me. My mom had never seen an ultrasound so she wanted to come. When she was pregnant with my sister and I (yes, twins) the doctor never let her see the screen. So anyway, the baby is measuring 6 weeks and the heartbeat was about 128 bmp. She said that was normal. I am still a little apprehensive and just want to get past the 12 week mark. In my last pregnancy, my 7 week ultrasound was normal except for the baby measuring a week smaller. We also asked her about what I can take for my RA. They prescribed me some Darvocet. I am scared to take it, but they said it would be ok. I hope that it works, I can barely walk. Yesterday I almost couldn't get out of my house because I couldn't turn the door knob and then I spent 10 min trying to get into my car. I had to have my 80 year old neighbor come open the door handle because I couldn't. As soon as my hubby scans the pics I will post them.

September 4, 2008: (7w1d) I couldn't take it anymore and saw my rheumatologist today. Darvocet was numbing me, but was not controlling the disease. I have been in tears all day from the pain and depression. Plus, the nausea has started to kick in....so my mom took me up there and I was hoping to get back on the Remicade. I needed something. He wound up putting me on a low dose of Prednisone twice a day. He also gave me an injection in my right elbow and my left wrist, since those were two of the most swollen joints. That was around 11:00 AM and by 6 or 7:00 PM I started feeling a little better. I am just praying that I can finally get some sleep tonight. I still just want to get past the 12 week mark in this pregnancy. I am so scared that I am stressing out my body so much that it will cause me to have another miscarriage. I just can't handle another one.

September 10, 2008: (8w) Well I am feeling better, but I am hungry all the time!!!!! I am also craving ice water and I normally don't like water. Boob soreness comes and goes, right now they don't hurt as bad as they originally did. I wake up at 2:00 am every morning to pee and about every 5 hours after that. I notice that on the days I'm laying around the house, I pee more. If I am busy at work, I don't pee as much.

September 17, 2008: (9w)The hunger is just unbearable, but I now think a lot of it is from the Prednisone. Increased appetite is a side effect. I have this awful taste in my mouth all the time, which is why I feel like I need water all of the time. I am not showing at all yet and I really want to start getting a belly. I haven't gained any weight either. I actually lost a pound when I was weighed at the rheumatologist yesterday. My doc is going to keep me on the same low dose of Prednisone and I will see him again in 6 weeks. I go for my next OB appointment on October 2. I will be 11 weeks then. I hope everything goes well.

October 2, 2008: (11w1d) I go to the OB again today. I couldn't sleep last night because I am so nervous. So far I have carried this baby farther than the last one and has had absolutely NO bleeding with this one. I don't know why I am still scared. I hope they are able to see a heartbeat and see the baby moving around. The nausea has gotten a little better, but I still get real hungry at times and I still can't get that bad taste out of my mouth. I am still not showing either. Some of the girls at work think I am, but I told them I always had a little pooch.....OK, at the doctor appointment they drew blood and all that stuff for tests. She did a pap smear and then got out the doppler to listen for the heartbeat. I was hoping to get an ultrasound, but she said she would only do one if we didn't hear the heartbeat. I laid there so nervous, and finally we heard it and she's like, "There it is!" It was the most amazing thing ever. My husband walked over to me and he was smiling. I started crying because I was so happy. She said it sounded perfect. I couldn't believe how clear it was! She's like, "you'll be fine."

October 10, 2008: (12w2d) At times I think I am feeling better, but then the hunger hits me. Lately though I haven't been craving anything specific to eat, even when I'm starving. I will start to eat and then I don't want to finish it. I have felt more like I want to vomit, but it is always when I'm on an empty stomach. I did have a dizzy spell the other day when I was standing in line at the bank. I started getting really hot and my ears were ringing and I was so scared that I would fall down. So far, that is the only time it has happened. My boobs are finally getting bigger. My husband looked at them the other day and had this disgusted look on his face. He said my nipples looked weird. Thanks!

October 23, 2008: (14w1d) I went to see my perinatologist today. It was a great appointment. They did a very thorough ultrasound and we got to see the baby move. The spine looked amazing when it moved. I asked if there was a way to determine the sex of the baby and she said it might be too early. They said the baby was measuring just like it was supposed to and that it had a nasal bone and everything. Heart beat was good. Then all of a sudden she's like, "OK, guys do you want to know the sex?" I said that it looked like a boy to me and she's like, "There's your son!" Then she was telling us not to tell anyone or buy anything yet because they aren't always 100% accurate, but I saw a PENIS there!!! There is no mistaking it :o) My morning sickness is gone and I am not as hungry which is a good thing. They are also continuing to keep me on my prednisone for my arthritis. I have been on cloud nine all day and I guess I have to start thinking of boy names now :o)

October 29, 2008: (15w) Went to regular OB today and all they did was listen to the heartbeat. She said it sounded perfect. I am going back next week for bloodwork.

November 5, 2008: (16w) Went to my rheumatologist today. He seemed to be pleased with the medicine that I am on, but decided to give me another injection in my left wrist and right elbow. It was everything I could do to not cuss at him. I hate getting those injections, but my joints always feel a little better afterwards. As far as the pregnancy goes, I still haven't been feeling sick and I have had a little more energy. My boobs are definitely fuller and I really just feel bloated all of the time. Depending on the time of day, my belly changes size.....but if I suck it in I don't look pregnant. I hope that I will start really growing soon. I also want to be able to feel the kicks. I feel little things that I think are movements but it is so hard to tell. I won't get another ultrasound for 2 more weeks.

November 12, 2008: (17w) Everything still seems to be going smoothly. I have been feeling great and my belly is poking out quite nicely. I got my lab results from my blood work and the nurse said that everything is normal. I go back to the perinatologist next week, hopefully for another ultrasound.

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