**10/23/2007**

I am around 7 weeks pregnant ..I think. I havent been to the dr yet. I will be on the 30th. Physically the pregnancy has been fine. I barely have gotten morning sickness or anything. But I'm starting to think I am suffering from alot of emotional distress. I feel kinda depressed and have become a jerk to everyone. I have always been a pretty happy laid back person so this is a drastic change. I hope it gets better soon. Any advice?

I hate to admit it but Im not very excited yet. I am worried about that too. Everyone else is excited though and that helps. I just wasnt expecting this and I am feeling alot of things right now. Me and my husband celebrated our 1st wedding anniversary yesterday (oct21) in my perfect world I wanted to have more time just me and him before a child came along. I feel like a horrible person and I am scared I am going to be a bad mother......and if you dont have anything nice to say please just dont say anything to me at all...I cant handle ugly comments right now.

...I hope its a girl

**10/30/2007**

I am using this as kind of a diary I guess you could say since no one I really knows me on here I can say how I really feel and not worry about someone getting mad. I had my first appointment today and I got to see the baby's heart beat...it doesnt look like anything yet. My due date is June 12th. I feel so much better. I think it was just hormones. Thanks for the comments everyone! :o)

11/7/07

Nothing really exciting. I am having dull cramps every once in a while but Im not worried b/c there is no blood and I have a pretty good feeling its my uterus stretching. I am not really showing yet. I still am pretty hormonal and act weird. The other night I had a come apart and scared my husband b/c I was just soo upset. Nausea is not as bad as it was. Anyways I told you nothing real exciting.ha ha

11/19/07

My belly is getting big! I am almost 11 weeks now

11/26/07

The nausea is gone but now I have really weird sleeping patterns. I wake up at 4 am watch tv or something for 4 or 5 hours fall asleep and wake up around 6pm and stay up till like midnight and do it all over again. Its very annoying. My next dr appointment is soon...thats exciting.

11/30/07

Drs appointment was today. We heard the heartbeat which was in the 160s which he said was really good. Every once in a while there would be a really loud noise and he said that was the baby moving around....kinda neat to hear. I have gained 2 lbs since the last appointment nurse said that was perfect. So basically it could not have been any better. My belly seems to have grown so much in a very short period of time. Thats all for now.

12/17/2007

I had a scare the other night I was cramping really bad and it just didnt feel like the normal cramps I'd had before. I work at a hospital so I went down stairs and took a visit to the ER. I just had to KNOW everything was ok because I felt awful. They did a u/s the placenta was laying a little low which is uncomfortable and also I have a UTI so Im on anitbiotics for that. Since then though I cant stop thinking about my little baby and how devestated I would be if I lost it. I didnt really talk to the baby like some girls do or anything but I find myself with my hand on my tummy and talking to him/her without even thinking about it now. I have officially bonded. Yes I am scared about being a mother and my husband being a father lol... and in the beginning I was not very thrilled about the unexpected suprise. Now i cant stop thinking about my baby and how much i love it and cant wait to hold it in my arms......and that seems SOO far away. So now I am truely trying to enjoy every moment of this experience. I just pray everything goes well....I can be so pessimistic.

12/25/07

I definitley for sure felt the baby move while laying in bed this morning! Merry Christmas to me!!!!

1/28/08

I feel the baby move AT LEAST once an hour. Its nice. My husband is so cute he always wants to feel every kick and movement I feel. We found out it was a girl Thursday and of course thats what i wanted the whole time...so I'm elated. The husband wanted a boy but I think he is over it now and he is happy to. I will put the pics up sometime later when I am not at work. I cant wait for June now.