BABY MICHAEL DEMETRIO born April 30th at 9:44pm

8 pounds 2 ounces

20 1/2 inches long

Hey!!! I moved my past entries over to : http:/www.i-am-pregnant/vip/my-lil-miracle-2 I just ran out of space on this one and I was kind of sad because I still have over 7 weeks of pregnancy left!!!

Here is a little overveiw so you don't have to go and read that other page...... I am 18 years old, i met my baby's dad on July 5, 2007 (my 18th birthday) and conceived this little miracle boy around July 28, 2007 (Don't judge me). I know this was quick.

I was living crazily for the first 13 weeks, i was living out on the streets, smoking, drinking, drugs and sadly prostitution. I was not capable of getting an abortion but I prayed I would miscarry. I had so many people around me telling me to "use my head, this baby will ruin everything for you", I couldn't get an abortion though. I became suicidal on October 31, 2007. I called my mom that day and we went to the hospital, I told them "last time i checked in August I was pregnant", they did a pregnancy test and it came up posotive, then they did an emergency ultrasound and I saw my little perfect innocent baby just floating around and waving at me.... It was the happiest day of my life. People say you become a mother as soon as u find out your pregnant. For me it took that first look at him to become a mother.

I am extremely proud to say that I have not smoked another cigarette, sipped another drink, or been involved in ANY drugs or prostitution since that day. I am getting my life together although sometimes it seems it is "too little too late". I rent a room in 2br house with a woman I seriously clash with. I have also applied for WIC, Foodstamps and Welfare and I receive all of them now. I am off and on with my son's dad, he is in the NAVY and I can't deny that he has done a lot for me in these past 5 months but I am unsure about him.

My family (at least my Dad and Mom -who are divorced for 17 years) have been supportive towards me. At first they were distant but in seeing my progress and dedication to this baby boy to be are gaining confidence in my sincerity. They are actually getting excited for him to get here... My grandpa (mom's dad) is not speaking to me, he doesn't like the fact that I am pregnant with a mixed baby. My sister (only sibling) also doesn't talk to me, she is 22 and in college doing very well... she's mad because of the choices i made and things i did in the beginning of my pregnancy. She says that "maybe once the baby's born" we will talk again... I have a lot of mixed feelings about that.

As for my perfect son, I can't beleive I have it in me to love someone this much... I have a lot of regrets about how i treated my body knowing that there was a person in there, but not caring. He is fine now though, the Dr's said that the past behavior of mine didn't affect him. He is so active all the time and I love talking to him. I'm thinking about names now and it's between Michael and Thomas for the first name and the middle name is for sure Demetrio.

Well, that was the quickest overveiw I could possibly give... I'll update soon!!!

March 15, 2008......................... 33 weeks and 1 day

So today was a pretty good day.. I went with my Dad to go visit some Family in Los Angeles (about 1 hour and 45 minutes driving distance from San Diego). I hung out with my Aunt and went shopping for baby boy things... It was really unexpected but each of my two aunts gave 100 dollars for this little baby "shopping spree"... I feel so blessed because I currently am relying mainly on gifts from people and gifts from the baby shower to really get my baby started (excpet for the bassinette and car seat/stroller which Sam and I will get). It was so generous of them and I am really grateful. He got some cute clothes most of which are 6 months size... he got some basic amenities too like lotions and babywashes, bibs and burp cloths... I was so excited I e-mailed Sam as soon as I got home with a very detailed list of what the baby got (1. I e-mailed him because he is out at sea until the 28th... 2. I am TOTALLY OBSESSED with making lists).

The Baby Shower is on the 29th of this month, and regardless of my ill feelings toward one of the hosts, I am trying so hard to make this about welcoming the baby into the world and about what We will gain help-wise from his gifts rather then about my annoyance with the host... I want the baby shower day to be special and happy and fun... I will have some loved ones there and there will be LOTS of pictues that will go in the scrapbook, so I'll try to be sunny about it.

My little handsome pooklynne jr. is doing so good today also, He was loving the attention and different voices and rubs that he was getting from my aunts... I wonder if he'll be a ladies man from birth :)

March 17, 2008 ..........................................33 weeks 3 days

I had my 33 week appointment today. I am measuring at 34 weeks, so only a few days ahead. My Midwife said this could either be attributed to the 12 POUNDS that I've gained in the past month, the sugar in my urine (could be getting a "fat baby" due to GD), or my baby is just growing a little big (it's only 4 days off). As for the GD, I go for ANOTHER 1hour test on Thursday... I feel cheated because I've already done the 1 hour at 24 weeks, failed it, then did a 3 hour and passed! I just hope I don't have GD, but it's looking like I do because of the reoccuring sugar in my urine and ridiculous weight gain this month... I have gained a total of 33 pounds through my pregnancy. Boo.

Last night it was so hard to sleep, I have a pretty good matress so I was surprised when it felt way too firm last night so I ended up lining up the pillows and sleeping on them... I still didn't sleep well though, and no money for at Maternity Pillow which I feel would be a lifesaver last night. I had to take the bus to the Dr. Appointment ( I got my driving permit 3 weeks ago and haven't even driven yet! That feels like a waste of money). I ended getting off the bus too early and having to walk/waddle a mile to the hospital. Needless to say my body hurt and I was EXHAUSTED when I got home. I think it was good for me to get some excersize though.

My baby is still doing very well, and strong heartbeat. Sam is really pushing to figure out the name once and for all... Little does he know that I had figured the name out about 2 to 3 months ago but now he doesn't like that name... It was supposed to be Thomas Demetrio, but now it's looking like Michael Demetrio... Isn't it so funny how a man will tell you to make a decision, but then he will "veto" it if he doesn't like it??? Then why are you telling me to make it then???

March 21, 2008................................34 weeks

Well today was kind of sad for me. I took the Gestational Diabetes yesterday, and got my results back today and of course it came back as a posotive... I'm aware it's not "that bad" as other challenges pregnant women face and also the fact that I am being diagnosed so late in pregnancy should be a plus, but I am just very upset about it. I'm sure NOBODY likes to prick their fingers 4 times a day to test their sugar, and I know that NOBODY wants to eat 6 perfect anorexically sized portions a day... I think I'm most upset that the woman who called me this morning made it sound like I will be living off : 1 egg and a slice of whole grain toast dry a day, and maybe if I'm good I can indulge in 4 trisuits with cheese... It's a big change from the two meals that I normally eat a day which are usually big... I just feel so guilty also, I know GD isn't "neccesarily" my fualt, but I feel sorry for my little man in there... I will only follow this dumb tasteless diet for him, so he won't have any breathing problems or any sugar problems. As for pricking myself so many times each day, NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO THAT, but I see my dad do it pretty much every day for many, many years. I am very aware that I will get annoyed constantly with that, because that's just how I am.

I know after all the BullShit I put this little man through the first tri-mester and after how healthy he is I just can't deny him the best chance possible. Speaking of the wee one, he had the most noticable hiccups today, they were so cute, I was starting to worry that something was wrong because I barely ever felt hiccups from him, and when I did I wasn't sure they were hiccups. Today however I am very sure and I loved watching my belly jump and touching it while he was hiccuping... the simple joys of a baby. If it was anyone else hiccuping I highly doubt I would think it so cute.

So Sam will be back in 1 week and my baby shower will be in 8 days. I can't wait to get My baby's basinette and carseat/stroller and set up and arrange and wash everything of his. It's pretty crazy that I can expect him in 6 weeks or less...! My Doctor was talking about inducing me (depending on my cervix and progessment in pregnancy) a week or so early, this was before we knew about the GD. She is willing to induce because Sam will be deploying May 3. I am not sure that I would want her to induce if Sam is the only reason because she told me that with induction comes a higher risk for Emergency C'section and other complications... Now that the GD is in the picture however we will see.

April 2, 2008................................35 weeks and 5 days

So, there has been so much going on lately!... I had my baby Shower on March 29, and received so many useful things like bottles, toys, clothes, wipes, socks and lots of other things... I am so thankful that I had that baby shower because now my little guy is set with clothes for a LONG TIME! I only received 2 packs of diapers, but that's okay because I can go to Costco and almost a months worth of diapers for 30$, so that's not a big problem.

Sam and I got the baby's bassinette and other essential things like an organizer, a lamp, and other little things like nightlight, batteries and such... So I put together the babys Bassinette the first day I got it and it's sitting there in my room with a quilted fitted sheet on it and little stuffed animals hanging from the the top of it... it looks so lonely over there without a baby in it yet, but I know it will be filled soon enough.

I also have washed all the clothes and blankets and towels and washcloths, also the hats and socks and booties as well... I beleive that's called "nesting" and I am sure that's what i did because I have had SO little sleep the past week or so, partially due to me trying to perfect things and get things ready for him and partially due to DISCOMFORT!

I have had 4 contractions now... two on Saturday March 29 and two on Sunday March 30 but none after that... I think I was just working myself too hard and doing too much walking.

I have been doing very well with my GD, I wake up and it's anywhere from 70 - 85 and after I eat it's usually around 120, so I am really trying to change my diet and get the walking in where I can.

I also had a Dr. Appointment today, now since becoming Gestational Diabetic I am considered a "high-risk" pregnancy therefore I can no longer see my beloved Midwife anymore.... booo..... I saw a Dr. today and she scared me a lot... She told me all of the things that could happen to my Baby due to my GD, I knew all this but she just said it in a way where it scared the shit out of me... Then she measured the top of the uterus to the pelvic bone and it was at 41!!!! I was so scared because she then felt my belly and said "Hmmmm.... it looks like he's about 7 1/2 pounds right now".... she then proceeded to tell me that Inducing a Gestational Diabetic is not an option (whatever, I talked to the GD specialist at my hospital and she told me they often induce a GD a week or week and a half early)... SO the Dr. also said that If I don't go into labor naturally by my duedate then she will order a c'section... I was like "what???"... I don't plan on seeing her again, I just don't agree really.

I have a U/s scheduled on the 14th to check on my little Pooklynne Jr.... a.k.a. Michael Demetrio!!! Today she did a short sonogram to make sure he is still head down and it was ADORABLE, he was just curled up in there and I saw his little back expanding and she told me that he is "practicing his breathing"... this made me so happy because it shows he is doing well with his lung development, which I know can be a concern for babies of GD mothers... SO that made me irresistabley happy. Also the Blood pressure of mine was 126 over 78 and No sugar in the urine (for the first time in months)... and the best news : I only gained 1 pound since my last visit about 2 weeks ago! (another reason why I'm confused why he is measuring 41?)

Well, I really need to go to sleep I'm sitting here with my eyes half shut, I've been up since 9am and it is now 1am, so I need to go... Hope all is well with you and your little muffins

Molly and baby Mikey

April 7, 2008...............................36 weeks 3 days

So I have some time to write here (I'm waiting for Sam to come get me... he's 50 minutes late already and probably fell back asleep seeing as how I haven't been able to get ahold of him in a while)......

Anyways, I have EVERYTHING ready for my Mister baby... He has his bassinette set up, just got his carseat/stroller ready, all his clothes are washed and everything is just waiting for him now. I still haven't packed a bag for us yet though... I should get on that soon I think.

I went up to L.A. during the weekend to see my family and go to my cousins babyshower... it was way more extrravagent then mine was.. there was a chocolate fountain, floral arrangements and a man came to make street tacos in their back yard! It was pretty fun... I did eat sweets though, so had some trouble with the Blood Sugar during the weekend, but I have managed to get it back to normal recently.

My baby is doing PERFECTLY! He had such bad hiccups a few days ago and it was precious!, I don't know what to do when he has them so I just sit back and watch! I love him so much...

I also have been feeling "prettier", the swelling all over has gone down, especially in my face (nose/cheek/double chin!).... actually caring enough to do my hair every day and make up every day as well...

Well, I hope you all are doing well and your babies are growing!!!

Molly and Baby Mikey-Poo

April 14, 2008...............................37 weeks 3 days

So Michael is doing FABULOUSLY!! I had a ultrasound to measure his size and other things and the technician said he is probably 7 pounds 12 ounces right now... but he is also measuring physically at 38 weeks, so the "new" due date has been moved to April 27th (well I don't think on paper it has though)... I got some pictures of his face which is pretty amazing considering how scrunched up he is in there... I also got it re-confirmed that he hasn't switched sexes on me!! still a handsome baby boy.... He looks JUST LIKE SAM!! he has such big pouty lips and a cute nose... each picture i received from the technician showed his big lips the most... can't wait for him!! (I tried to upload them to this site, but couldn't manage to right now, so I'll try over at Sam's house on Wednesday).. also I had a NST again today and the contractions are showing up on there more often then I feel them... we'll see with that.... Mikey hates the NST's and freaks out on the little moniters that go on my belly.. it's so cute, but I guess that's why we get the test done quickly because he can't stand the moniters pressing on him! SO CUTE......

So there has been a little drama going on in my life... that would be in the living situation... I'm sure if u read this u probably know already about the crazy self-righteous selfish woman that I rent my room from here... so she went crazy on me last night and was cussing, slamming doors telling me "this is my house" (no shit... but she agreed on certain things when I came into a house and said that she understood that things would be different with living with another person)... anyways at the end of her little senior tantrum she told me "consider this your 2 months notice!"... like that was supposed to startle me.... My dad and I have had bets on how long she would last with my baby here, Dad said a month.. I told him less then 15 days... I guess I was closer! So her wanting me out in 2 months is definetly a plan that is going to backfire on her... since there is NO WRITTEN CONTRACT I'm moving out a.s.a.p as in BEFORE SAM LEAVES... so basically all my shit will be out of here BEFORE THE BABY ARRIVES within the next two weeks... I can't beleive Janet (dumb senile bitch who is my landlord)... I knew she had lots of problems, but I didn't think she would be one of those people who wants to put my life like it is hers (don't know if i wrote this up here or not but she contacted a stembank and gave them all my info and had them sending shit to me and she was talking ot them on the phone everyday telling them how i want to save my baby's umbilical cord and telling them that my FAMILY was going to pay for it!!! I called that damn stembank and told them that Janet is old and doesn't know what the hell she is talking about so unless she is about to pay for that then I have no interest).... whatever.... I'm just really glad Sam is willing to get my ass out of here soon... that's a lot of stress off me....

Sam gets home on Wednesday (he's at sea again) and he is going to rescue me from this house with the selfish devil in it... I have ALL TOMORROW TO GET THROUGH though, so I'm going to take the bus and trolley to the mall and see a movie SOLO!! Hey air conditioning and time away from here makes me happy!!!... then on Wednesday I will be out of here and with Sam for a while which I can't wait for... I also have my Doctor's appointment on Thursday (after a NST)... I am really hoping and PRETTY SURE ALSO that the Dr. will check to see for any dialation or thinning.... PLEASE< PLEASE< PLEASE!! I really hope I am dialated at least 2 so that induction is an option...

I hope you and all ur little ones are doing well and that if ur in the heat like me that ur keeping cool and hydrated!!!! Take care - Molly and Mikey-Poo

April 21, 2008 .........................................38 weeks 3 days

So, last weeks dr. appointment went well, my baby is unaffected by my Gestational Diabetes, and I was 25% effaced and about 1 1/2 cm. dialated... so it's very late at night right now so i have to get up early for another Dr. appointment tomorrow morning... hoping to be dialated more and effaced more... Playing the waiting game with Mikey.

I am also on the search for a new place to live (perfect timing, right?), it is inconvenient and stressful, but i know it will be worth it in the end, and i really hope that Mikey stays in there for at least another week, i just really want to take him "home", not somewhere else and then take him home a week later...

I'm also spending these last few weeks with Sam, and it's sad and happy at the same time, but mostly sad... we both know it is now inevitable to postpone his deployment, but we're both hoping that he is here for Mikey's birth, to at least see his little boy and hold him a few hours before he leaves to sea for six months... It is really heartbreaking and i get overwhelmed when i think about all the things that we need to get done BEFORE the baby comes and then i feel rushed with those things because we need the baby to come BEFORE sam leaves, therefore pushing what needs to be done up...

I'm just hoping the baby will come by the 24th to 27th, I always thought a May baby would be nice though because "april showers bring may flowers", but I pretty much won't be seeing Sam at all in May, and he deploys on the 4th of May... timing is just so off... It breaks my heart to think that my little boy won't see his dad until he is half a year old, and it breaks my heart even more that Sam may not get to see his ONLY CHILD until he is 6 months... I wish things weren't like this...

Well, i'll update again tomorrow most likely and hopefully there will be some good news on the dialation and progress??

Take care of urselves and the little ones - Molly and Mikey

April 23, 2008 ............................................. 38 weeks and 5 days

So I had another Doctor appointment yesterday and am still 1 1/2 cm dialated and 25% effaced, so no change there (it's only been 5 days though since my last internal exam...)... anyways I have my Induction Date scheduled for April 29th.... Crazy, that's only 6 days away!!!

I am still trying to figure out the living situation... Now that Sam is finally telling me that he can pay for everything (rent/baby things/laundry), my Dad is telling me to just hold on for a few more days... I don't know what he's doing but I know he's going to talk to my Sister (she lives with him and she has scorn me from the family)... I am hoping that he will let me move in with him and my sister... that would be ideal... I was so adament when I first turned 18 about leaving, now I am saying "what the hell was I running away from?"... what i had then is a lot better and more stable then what I now have.

So I am worried that I am already getting "baby blues"... I'm just depressed a lot of the time and crying. I don't know weather it's "baby blues" hormones or weather it's just the circumstances surrounding all this that stresses me out. I really hope I get in a better, happier mood soon because it will break my heart if I can't enjoy my son's infancy and him being a newborn.

I am so blessed, I know, to have my parents be so supportive. I hope that I will be as good of a parent to my little boy as they are to me. I know they will be very good grandparents...

Well as for my Little Mikey, he's doing great, at the Dr. appointment yesterday he was measuring on target! Each week I also have 2 NST's and his amniotic fluid is always plenty... the last 2 NST's however, I have gone in and he was sleeping, so they had to "buzz" him... so sad... "buzzing" is just this little vibrating thing that makes a loud noise so it startles him... I feel so bad for thinking it's cute when he jumps at that!!! LOL...

Well, I am having some weird dreams last night... The weirdest one is that there were bugs ALL OVER this house... especially on the bed, I'm talking about skinny spiders and mosquitos... ewww.... I also had a dream that Janet (the crazy landlord) was trying to befriend me or maybe hitting on me??? I can't exactly remember that dream and don't want to, I have been less stessed out each day because I haven't had to deal with her or see her or talk to her for a while (I'm staying at Sam's until I get my own place - but who knows what's happening with that one?)... I also had a dream that I was in the hospital having the baby, but my Dad was the one in the hospital bed... My dad is in remission from Bladder cancer but still has some issues like he gets sick very easily when he gets stressed out, so he was so stressed out with this situation that he ended up in the hospital rather then me!! I'm a wreck...

Okay ladies and babies, I hope you all are doing well, and hopefully feeling well!!! take care - Molly and Mikey

May 13, 2008

Haven't updated in forever, I know, but I had Michael on APril 30th and he's almost 2 weeks old already!!! it's true what they say about the little ones growing up quickly.

So I am living with my Dad now, and this is a permanent place at least for a few years. I like it, the room is so much bigger and I have my own bathroom, no one here smokes, and the condo complex is really big and well taken care of.

Sam is off to sea already....sad but that's the way it is so I'll see him in November. We e'mail every day and whenever they port he calls me and sends Mikey a postcard, so we're trying to make this as easy as possible.

Michael is doing really well, I've never met a newborn who didn't outright cry until I met Mikey, he just doesn't cry, he'll fuss but not cry, I don't know why this is but am thankful for it.

Michael is such a sweetie, and loves to be read to and he LOVES his aunt... speaking of which, my sister and I are now talking, it's still gets akward sometimes and there are times when I just shut up and nod to what's being said, but all in all things are okay with us. She loves Mikey so much and honestly, that's all that matters to me at this point.

Well, Mikey is sleeping so I think that's my que to go to sleep as well...

Take care of yourselves and your families.......... Molly and MIkey