My profile

December 6, 2008

Just to update a bit... still not pregnant and not even ttc! Don't know when I will, but my focus on losing weight is going pretty good! Down 8-10 pounds and still working hard to get to my goal by January ... or February! LOL... I still check up on all of you here... see all the beautiful growing bellies! ;) as well as all the women anticipating a BFP =( I hope 2009 will bring EVERYONE here joy and love and happiness!!! Thanks for all the support for my roller coaster ride!!!

Ok sooo I figured I should have my story as my intro so everyone knows my story (even though many of you already do and have been WONDERFUL!!!!) Where to begin... I was pregnant early this year (conceived in January) and I was sooo excited bc I reached my 14~15 week and ready to tell the world!!! We have been trying to conceive for 4 years on and off! and then finally we did it! It started for me around April 24th... I went to my obgyn and told her I had increased discharge and a bit of cramping. She checked me and I was fine and the baby was doing great!! She did notice that my placenta was low and told me that is normal and usually picks up as the baby grows...She advised me to rest more and to make an appt for a scan asap. I had no bleeding what so ever! That night I was sleeping and I woke up bc I felt cramping... it truly felt like gas. I tried going to the bathroom and nothing. I tossed and turned for a while then went on the computer to see if I could figure out what was going on. Well I got really nervous and went to the ER and waited in pain! (of course) When the practicing dr came over she saw something and asked if the dr ever told me that I had cysts... I replied no! She then told me to hold on and got another dr to check me. He immediately told me my amniotic sac was bulging out. This was at 3:30 am... I had to wait for the sono tech and the obgyn to come in... I did an ultra at 6am and still no STUPID dr!!! basically I thought I could have a cerclage done, but by the time he saw me and then by the time they sent me to the maternity ward it was past 7am and the dr up there told me, 'I'm sorry honey... it's too late to do it." and I was given a pill to induce my labor and go through delivering my baby and realize that there's no chance of saving him!!! I am just mad at the world! There's just so much that we have to go through and then you here about these little girls getting pregnant and then abusing them! If I could just have ONE of my own I would be the happiest woman... For all the ladies that have gone through miscarrying or even worse still birth... be strong and have faith even though we seem to have lost it temporarily!

That was my background... now after trying for 2 months I got my BFP... I'm still very early in the pregnancy and don't want to get my hopes up. My hcg levels were low, but are going up so that's a plus, but my obgyn wants me to make sure that it's not just a chemical pregnancy. I have been blogging with what's been going on so I don't want to repeat myself. =) I'm just taking it day by day and praying that I will be able to go full term with this little angel of mine. My fiance isn't the most excited one right now, but I just think he's scared as well! Once he hears the little heartbeat... he will come around!! I'm not doing a thing wrong this time around! I don't care how much I hate the prenatals I'm taking them!!! I won't even pick up a gallon of milk if my doc doesn't want me to! LOL... I'm trying not to think about it so much, because I found out soooo early I feel like it's an eternity until the 15th of this month! I just want to tell the world, so everyone at work would just stop looking at me with the sad look on their face! =) This has to be my chance to finally be a mommy from the beginning!!

Thank you to all you BEAUTIFUL women and one day we will alllllll share our crazy baby stories with one another!!! You are all in my thoughts and prayers and I couldn't be luckier to have such an AMAZING support group here! I'm sooo happy I stumbled across this site!