Something really scary happened to me and i dont know if you all will think im crazy or what!

All i know is it happened!! So here goes...

On the 12 june i went to bed at 2am and was a sleep for an hour and the i notice myself waking but more like i was dying,

i could not move at all or breath.. i tired so hard to move and breath but it was pointless.. i felt myself giving up.. i was blacking out... i knew then i was dying.. then i remeberd my belly and what it contained my baby!! so with that thought i open my mouth a little (i still at that point could not move or scream) a little extra air went in me and suddenly i was able to breath.. soon as i was free to move and breath, the baby started to kick like mad.. non stop. kick.. bunch..

I think the baby got scared too... i was really upset and i felt my baby could of been harm... it hurts more to think the baby was scared while he or she was in my care, in my body where i should be looking after he or she, the baby kicked and punched for two hours solid...

I stroked my belly to ease the baby to sleep and finally the baby did.. i was so hurt more for the baby than me!! i know i cant explain it but it happened my husband who was sleeping next to me was very upset.. but i could not move or scream to reach out to him..

Still hurts but i notice the baby gets upset too so i try not to think about it but i am a scared that it may happen again!!

29 June 2007

Im a lil upset... quite a few things have happened since the last time I wrote...

My hubby had a major accident on Monday the 18th at 2.00 am and it was major.. A joy rider nearly went in to his car which he swerved round to avoid a head on collision, he then lost control of the car as it was raining.. went straight in to a furniture shop through the shutter and window going through glass tables and many other glass furniture inside the shop...before his car came to a halt in the shop, the shop was pitch black.. he had flip flops on his feet..trapped in the car.. he forced the car door open which was jammed by furniture around his car and made his way through the glass, under the shutter and outside. Luckily he was unhurt (thanks to god)!

The police and fire brigade were called to the scene and the police were unable to get hold of the shops owners so arranged for the shop to be boarded up!

His car is now probably a write off!

He came home at around 4.00 am and we hardly slept a wink!

In the morning he got up early and went to face the store owners as requested by the police! The store owners were understandably not too happy!

I myself have been getting theses weurd pain at the top of my tummy like numb pain also for the past couple of days which I was worried about so I called the hospital who asked me to go in to get checked out!

Not wanting to add to my husband’s troubles I told my husband I was going to see a friend who was in hospital and will be back later on!

At the hospital I waited and waited for what seemed like hours and was finally seen by a mid wife a couple hours later who after discussing my symptoms attached some baby monitoring equipment to me which I was attached to for about an hour.

Then came the needles, I am needle phobic and was so so distressed… the mid wife told me they had to check me for gestational diabetes, normally my husband is with me to hold my hands and comfort me and today I was all alone. I was so so scared and the nurse taking my blood didn’t help by not finding my nerve properly and causing me pain! i was so upset by the end of it...

By this time I was starving as I had only had a light breakfast and the time was almost 6pm.and I needed to wait for a Doctor to come in to see me. the doctor arrives who examines me and tells me that I may have gestational diabetes and my baby is too big for the 28 weeks that I am.He asked me to make an appointment for an Ultrasound and a further appointment to see the clinic’s head consultant!

I was so so distraught! I might have gestational diabetes and my baby is big too! Everyone tells me I am too big and I don’t even binge eat and neither to do I eat junk food!

So now I am discharged, emotional and upset I get a bus home and my husband calls… he ask where I am and I tell him I am on the bus so he leaves to meet me and finds me half way home…he sees the plaster on my hand and ask what happened? I just breakdown in tears, he is so worried fearing the worse… so I tell him I went to the hospital and what happened. He was very upset that I never told him I was going to the hospital! I just didn’t want to worry him!

The next morning my sweet Husband wakes up early and calls the hospital and arranges the ultrasound and an appointment with the consultant! 1^st they tell him the next appointment is available till the 31^st of August but somehow he manages to convince the clinic to fit me in earlier!

I’ve had my Ultrasound and my appointment with the consultant now! Apparently I do no have gestational diabetes and my baby isn’t too big so there is nothing to worry about!

I still worry.. waited to have a baby for so many years ..I pray the lord blesses me with a healthy child.

11 more long weeks to go!

17 July 2007

31 Weeks

Im real tired... My legs are swollen feel dizzy and cant breath too well, constantly, been trying to rest but its hard!! Also developed a urine infection... i am now on antibiotics!! for the past five days not clearedout as yet........ getting there

I feel a little upset with my midwife!! as i feel she just a cow!! well in my medical book it say things that the midwife should be doing on certain weeks... and as yet she done none!!

1. No measuring
2. No listening to fetal heart
3. No weighting
4. No! nothing
5. No! advice!!

Every complaint i have.. her answer would be "its normal"

dont know what to do if i should change midwifes or not, my husband not happy with her service!! My bump is grown so big!! developed loads of stretch marks.. wont be seen in a bikini again.. it still be worth it, to see te little treasure the lord has bestowed on us... Cant wait!!

Little scared that i may be in line for a C section! hope not...