July 17th 2008. 30 weeks 1 day. I have been documenting everything since about ten weeks along, but somehow I managed to delete everything, so I am going to summarize the miraculous last 30 weeks. It will probably be less boring for anyone reading anyway ;)

My sweetheart and I are expecting our first child together, but have childen from previous marriage. I found out I was pregnant at 3-4 weeks on Jan 22nd when I woke up feeling very sick, and realized I was two days late for AF. According to all the calculations, we concieved on the first day of the year:) It was a complete surprise, as I was on birth control, and we did not plan on having children(yet anyway). What a beautiful blessing! Lucky for us(and baby) we have a very strong, loving relationship, and always have. After the initial shock, I decided to embrace the unexpected change, and realized what a true miracle it really is. It has been a healthy but not easy pregnancy so far, I had severe morning sickness, exhaustion, and just about every other complaint there could be, but to me all worth it. 9 months of discomfort is well worth a healthy baby. We went for our first ultrasound at 7.5 weeks, and were so relieved to hear and see the little heartbeat! I had a previous miscarriage at 9 weeks 3 years prior, so I was very afraid to find out the same would happen. Our next sonogram was two weeks later, because I had been having somewhat strong cramping, and they wanted to make sure baby was ok. Our little one was fine, and had grown so much! He went from a little bean, to a peanut lol. My heart couldn't be happier. Our next sonogram was at 3 months, and we saw our perfectly formed little baby, waving his arms and kicking his legs like crazy. At one point it looked like he was riding a bike his little legs were going so fast. Still a little peanut but well on the way. At that sonogram, I had already decided he had Daddy's feet. We did not find out what we were having until the 20 weeks sonogram, but before that, at about 10 weeks I think, I had a dream it was a baby boy (I had been having very vivid dreams at that point) I had taken him out to play, saw it was a boy, but put him back becuase he wasn't ready yet. We had a feeling he was a boy all along, but I still said well you never know....Once we found out we were both so thrilled! Mike is such a proud papa, and had to tell everyone about his boy :) I would have been happy either way, boy or girl, but to hear he is a boy, it just felt so right, that i would have a son. When we had the 20 week sonogram, it was a great relief to know he had no visible problems (I am a worrier I can't help it) and he was the perfect size for his gestational age. Each day after that, I have become more and more excited about our new little addition. Less worry, and more excitement. Once I made it to 24 weeks, it became more real for me, that we would have a baby boy, a son in our lives. Up until that point I think I had been so afraid to think fully about it.

On July 03rd, at 28 weeks, we went for our 4d sonogram. We got to see our little ones precious face! We decided right away, he has my nose, lips, and possibly eyes. He seemed to have Daddy's big hands and feet, he kept covering his face with his hands it was the cutest thing to see. While we were there, he was blowing kisses, playing peek a boo, sticking his tongue out, and chewing on his foot :) I do believe he is going to be a ham. We think he will have alot of black hair, like Daddy. All I can say, is I am so in love with my son growing inside of me, and I thank God every day for this precious gift. I believe he is about 3 lbs, and his kicks are stronger every day. He has been been head down for a while, so his kicks are strongest in my stomach(fun fun) it hurts but oh well. I feel his little hands constantly moving in my lower abdomen. The first time I felt his hand, I was 4 months, I was lying on my left side, and I felt a tiny hand going along the inside of my abdomen against the mattress. It was like he was feeling the mattress. Ever since I felt that, I knew it was his hands, and now he does it every time I lie down, on either side it is the cutest thing. It is almost like he is trying to figure out what it is. I am counting down the weeks, and had a thought the other day. He is due the same exact week I was due, but my birthday is August 08th. I was 6 weeks early. It dawned on me that this could very well happen with him, OMG! Well, you never know we will see......as of now I am counting down......10 more weeks to go :))

July 24th, 2008.

I can't wait for my baby boy to get here! Now that it is so close I go back and forth between wanting him here already, and thinking OMG there is soo much to do still. I swear some days i feel when he has gotten bigger, and I love to know he is soo big and strong in there! When I feel him move it is so amazing. I can't wait to be able to look at his little face :) I am having my shower on Sunday(one of them anyhow) and I am looking forward to it, it'll be fun! My honey and the kids are in Manhattan for two weeks, they have been gone for 4 days, and the house is soooooo quiet. I decided when the trip was planned that I would be to big hot and miserable to go walking around New York in July, and boy was I right. I am glad I didnt go, I would have slowed them down big time. So it is just me Snoopy(recovering from his accident) and peanut. I have been enjoying the extra time to myself, but I miss my honey sooo much! I feel like I am growing by the day, and my sweetie took me shopping(again) for a whole new maternity wardrobe a couple of weeks ago. I can't believe I have gone through so many maternity clothes already. I cannot wait to have a healthy baby, and a hot body again lol. I miss being sexy. Right now I feel like a blimpo. There is no doubt about it. All worth the sacrifice, but patience is my weak point, and I get the fact that God probably wants me to learn more of it, through this experience and through being a mother. Well off to get some rest :)

August 02nd, 2008. I am 32 and 3, and am more and more excited about our baby coming. I am soo huge, and uncomfortable. On a happy note we bought the bassinet today, it is soo adorable and I am in love with it :).I am always worrying now about the birth, not the pain(I plan on getting an epidural and anything else they offer lol) but if he will be ok. I hate hearing horror stories now. I just can't wait for him to be home, and healthy. I am sooo glad we are so close to the big day! I can't wait to look into your eyes little one :))

August 08th, 2008 It's my Birthday and i am just turning 32)!! 08/08/08 and I am 8 months pregnant(33 weeks now), gotta love it. I am also officially on bedrest, but hopefully only for a week. My blood pressure was up alot more than normal for me yesterday, so the midwife said, hmm it looks like it is time to start listening to your body huh? All I could think was, well I have been listening for a while now, it's everyone else that hasn't listened to me but I am not going to dwell on the fact right now. The baby is doing ok, and that is all that matters right now. Speaking of baby, I soooo can't wait for him to arrive! I have constant heartburn(more like heart chest throatburn) it is soo gross, and I wake up with it, and go to bed with it. I have finally broken down and taken tums for it-I gave up on the not taking anything at all theory. This late in the game, I don't think any tums will hurts. So besides the heartburn, my sinusus have been stuffy for months, I can't breathe( he hasn't dropped yet)so he is squishing my lungs, my lower back is in a constant state of stiffness/pain, I have isomnia, and my stomach is so squished, I have to eat a few bites at a time over a period, so I don't get sick. It is also like a circus act seeing me roll over in bed, or trying to get comfortable. OMG, I have like 80 pillows just to get somewhat comfy. I have pregnancy induced/aggravated carpal tunnel in both wrists,numbness in both my arms(and sometimes legs) and the heart palpatations. I also can't stand up for more than 3 mins at a time, without getting extremely dizzy.We women sure do sacrifice ALOT to give life. We go through the 9 months of suffering, for the grand finale of excruciating labor and delivery. But do you know what? Once we look into our babies eyes, it is all forgotten in a flash, and we would absolutely without a doubt do it all over again.( I know I would anyhow). Sooo, little Connor, I love you so much already, I know as I sit here typing at 06:00 in the morning because I can't sleep, that you are moving inside of me right now, and it makes my heart melt. I cannot wait to meet you. I hope I can be the best mommy that you could ever ask for.

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