I have a question, actually looking for direction. I`m sure this has been asked a million times before, but I wouldn`t have participated in the conversation previously because I thought I was having a girl thi time, and I already have 5 daughters. Is anyone circumsising(sp) their sons? I am an only child, so no brothers to relate this with, and I am NOT about to ask if my dad or step-dad was, because frankly Id rather NOT know that much about them,lol. My husband is the ONLY guy I have ever been with, so I can`t compare whats up. He is adamant that our son have it done. I have tried to read up on it, but I find one sided opinions with little medical fact. I said I would rather let him make the choice when he is older, like we do with our daughters getting their ears pierced. My husband said it is NOT the same thing,lol, and no grown guy would ever elect to have it done . I guess Im just worried about the pain of it, I`ve heard they don`t use any anesthesia? I vaccinate my kids for obvious reasons, and if it is just medically better on him to have it done, then no problem. I live in the US, and I think I read europe does not do it? I have people telling me it`s just for cosmetic reasons, others say it prevents disease, easier to clean, just a better decision. Just looking for opinions and support I guess, not trying to start a debate or fight between anyone.
My mother became an obstetrics nurse and she said that after watching the circumcision procedure, she would NOT have gotten my brother circumcised. From some ladies’ descriptions, it doesnt sound so grim, but my mother’s opinion was that it was mean to do to a baby. Once she said the doctor botched one and he nearly cut the penis half off. The other thing I’ve wondered about is if it desensitises the penis. Circumcised penises are behind their little skin house all day, not rubbing on fabric and seams, and surely that must keep the skin more sensitive under there?
I totally believe its a personal choice. my son is circumsized it was a 5 minute procedure and healed before his belly button did. he didnt even cry. but its totally a personal choice. so dont let any one sway you one way or another you and your husband need ot make this decision together. but he would know best since he has the same “equipment”. good luck with the decision. 🙂
Michelle(pink)-there is no misconception at all—The bible is God’s word that we should follow everyday-anyhow it is not painful at all for the baby, my hubby went back with both my sons and he said they didnt even cry, it does not hurt for them to pee either, you keep it lubed up with a&d oinment every diaper change and it heals around the same time the umbilical cord falls off…
All 4 of my boys are circumcised, I think it’s a personal choice. I was there when one of my boys got circumcised and they put a little topical numbing stuff on then they did it really quick, he let out 1 little cry and was fast asleep within seconds of it being done, so it wasn’t painful for him. I think if your hubby wants it done, then I would do it, but again it’s a personal choice and there is no right or wrong on this one, just alot of different personal opinions. Good Luck with your decision!
In Australia it’s considered a cosmetic procedure, there can be issues with circumcised/uncircumcised penis’s no matter how clean he is. Over the last 5 years There has been an increase in men wanting to be uncircumcised and apparently that is no easy process. My husband and son are not done, if our son wants it done when he is older that’s HIS choice not ours. I talked to my grandfather who has it done and he said don’t do it it’s an individual choice and should not be determined by anyone other than the person in question. And to be blunt I would not inflict my son with this unnecessary pain. Please don’t take offense to the things I have said just trying to be informative from what I have found out.
Savedbygrace: With respect, it is a common misconception that Jesus requires Christians to circ their sons. The circumcision requirement was when God’s people were under the old covenant God made with Abraham. Jesus’ death fulfilled that covenant, so we are no longer under those requirements. Jesus actually stated that whether a man was circ’d or not was unimportant (along with declaring all food to be clean and the cleansing rituals to be unnecessary). 🙂
Any sons I may have will not be having it done. An uncut penis does not equal an unclean penis. The vast majority of the world does not do it, and are just fine. When I researched circumcision, I found that all the pros of having it done were just “possible” pros, not conclusive (and I really looked extensively at both sides).
I don’t get why a boy would get teased? Even if he lived in an area where it’s more common to be circ’d, why would people be seeing his penis? I never had to appear naked in front of other kids in the locker room; why would he?
I also don’t think whether the father is cut should determine one’s decision- it’s too important a decision to make based on whether their privates look the same.
It seems like it would be painful for a baby boy to get urine on the circ wound before it is healed, as it surely would, being in a diaper. I know he won’t remember it or the procedure itself, but that wouldn’t make me okay with inflicting pain on my baby for a procedure that is technically unnecessary.
Bottom line for me is that I couldn’t cut something off of a beautiful baby who was born perfect just the way he is.
Good luck with your decision! Despite my strong opinion, I believe there is no right or wrong in what parents decide on this, as long as they educate themselves on the options and make a well-informed decision. 🙂
It’s medically better to just have it done. I have a son and it was quick and I didn’t have to watch. His wee wee looked just fine when it was said and done and I am glad that he won’t get stared out or made fun of. It’s much cleaner, too. But you do what you gotta do!
Thank you so much everyone for the info and thoughts on this! Like I said, I couldnt exactly ask my family about my uncles, dad, cousins,lol. Definitely gives me some time to think and look into many of the valid points everyone has brought up. As any mother, I just want what is best for my child, so researching and asking questions from those who had experience seemed the best route to start with.
there are some medical things that have been said about it. I personally would circumsize. I belive dr oz talked about it at some point. they did a study of men in africa ( ?) where stds are common and found men that were circumsized had less chance of having them then men that werent i dont remeber why that is now. also cleaning is a pain. i worked in daycare with many a non circumsize boy and u have to pull back the skin to clean and sometimes it doesnt go away the way back. i have seen lots of posts from men complaining how the skin never will pull back all the way causing bleeding and pain (especially during intimacy) of course this is a personal choice but if he decides he wants it done when he is older- insurance definitly wont cover it ( some do cover babies. mine does) and it is a major surgery instead of a less then 15 min ordeal. they do use some sort of topical numbing and it does heal fast and doesnt cause to much discomfort. I hope this helps.. its definilty a personal choice a good book ( expecting 411) and possibily a website on it is https://windsorpeak.com/expecting411/..
they are very here are the facts about it.
I had both of my boys done when they were born. They didn’t use any anesthesia or anything. Here in sc they don’t let you be in the room with him when its done but i was sure they both was in good hands and had god watching over them. Its quick and my oldest lil boy the dr said he cried for a split second and my baby boy didn’t. my choice of having it done was cause i remember reading in the bible that boys should be circumsized and the doctors said that the chances of them getting diseases are less than the chances of an uncircumsized male because its easier to keep the circumsized male cleaner than the un. Good luck with your decision making!
It is personal choice. The African study had a variable that was uncontrolled….the circumsized men had to obstained from sex at all for a period of time (they gor circumsized as adults) and the uncircumsized males didn’t obstain for any periods of time. The rate of disease equaled the rates of time being spent sexually active. They are thinking of redoing the study with controlling this variable….two test groups, both obstain from sex for the two months or whatever (six weeks?) and then see if the rate of disease was still consistant with the other study. It is actually a huge debate in the scientific community.
I will circumsize my son because my husband remebers kids being ridiculed in gym for being uncircumsized. I said he gets the final say because I don’t know how to life life with a penis.;)
On the look subject of it, if you love someone, it doesn’t matter if a man is circumcised or not… Are you not gonna marry someone cuz he isn’t? Lol… My son is circumcised tho.. my fiancÃ© is and he wanted his son done… When I spoke to my doctor he told me it DOES help reduce risks of infections and stuff like that so I figured that was the thing to do for us…. It is mostly cosmetics but there is plus sides to have it done too….
id like to add,i just read all the comments below and have to say i have been with both circumsised and not and have to say when a guy is erect you cant even notice his not circumsised,and i dont see why women would think its yuk. as for being picked on at school in gym i dont know,because i live in australia and they dont get undressed in front of each other,every1 has a right to privacy,,if how ever you decide not to get it done please dont pull back the skin to clean it,not needed untill it retracts itself when they get older then you can just explain that they need to clean it and i aso if any of my boys got an infection id get them done,but not for the purpose of looks..good luck with what ever direction you take 🙂
My 3 boy’s are not circumstised and there father was,not for belief but for medical reason’s,he had an infection when he was a young boy,it was never bought up wheather we should or not,although my sil had it done to her son becaue his father had it done but that was purely for belief sake his also from nigeria..How ever im pregnant now to my new parner who is not circumsised and i will not be getting my new baby done if its a boy unless infection and has to be done..But each to there own belief or medically,every one has a choice and opinion..
to answer a few of your questions at the bottom…it does not prevent desease or infections to circumcise, and it isn’t easier to clean either, an uncircumcised penis requires the same amount of cleaning as a circumcised one… I would say its definately a cosmetic thing…sometimes I wish I got my older sons done, but whats done is done and hes too big for me to have it done now without having to go to sleep to have it done…but it doesnt really matter either way cause there really isnt a difference besides what it looks like…good luck on your decision
I would say it’s mostly up to you and what yyou want to do. I have 2 sons and one is circumcised and one is not, my older son is the one who is not and he has never had any kind of infection or anything and has never had any problem with it except when he was getting older and was about ready to potty train he got sensitive in that area when I would wipe him,I took him to the doctor to make sure nothing was wrong but there wasn’t, it was an easy fix, I just potty trained him, as long as you dont pull back the foreskin they wont get an infection, the foreskin has to stay in place to protect the cells that protect the penis from infection, they arent supposed to pull it back until it does it on its own, usually around the age of puberty, prematurely retracting it could even damage the penis, so I had to tell anyone who changed his diaper to leave it alone….I had my other son circumcised like his daddy because thats what his father wanted (different father) it was done in the hospital the day after he was born, he was uncomfortable the first day but it took no time at all to heal and he was fine the next day. I really don’t feel a certain way about either decision, I just did what daddy wanted, he felt bad at first because he was deployed in Afghanistan and he called right when the baby got back to my room after having the procedure done and he heard him crying and it made him so sad, but our son will never remember that experience and had no complications from the procedure…sorry if I am no help to your decision but I hope I helped in giving a little info 🙂
I have an appointment with my OB/DR tomorrow. I will ask him too. I remember him saying with my previous pg’s, that he does the procedure in the hospital, I had girls so it was irrelevant back then. I want to know what form of anesthesia is used and have him give his opinion and so on. Otherwise I will be contacting my pediatrician as well and getting her insight. I didn’t want ALL medical professional opinions because they are biased for the most part. And again, I really do appreciate all of you taking the time to respond to my question. It has been such a major helpâ™¥
1st-time- I believe it depends on the baby. at my hospital they only use the topical numbing agent and my son didnt cry at all. infact he slept through it according to my pediatrition. some babies cry when they get shots too and others dont so its definatly depends on the baby. again my hospital only uses he numbing gel and my son didnt make a peep when it was being done and it only took 5 minutes.
This question prompted me to look up videos on youtube of circumcisions being performed on newborn boys. I saw two videos, on one of them the doctor performing the procedure only used some type of rub to numb the area and the baby cried bloody murder during the whole procedure. The other one I watched the doctor did use a local anesthetic (injected with a needle) then he waited 5 mins for the meds to kick in and then he started the procedure and that baby didnt cry AT ALL. So i think its important to make sure you ask the doctor will an anesthetic (injected with a needle) be used and will he be waiting a few mins for it to kick in before starting the procedure. Hope this helps!
Yes it is unclean to me…both my sons were circumsized and so is my husband, im having another boy in may and he will be too. Boys are more prone to bacteria infections and other things.(especially those who are sexually active) plus the Lord Jesus says its unclean…So my advice if you live your life for the Lord, pray about it and im 100% that the Lord will tell you its HIS will, its in the bible. My sister said my brother n law is not and he wished his parents would have…
We did not circumsize our son (now 10 months) Daddy also is not circumsized. Our doc was glad we chose not to because it is mostly a cosmetic or religious thing. You do have to make sure it is clean and take care of it but same with any other part of your body. It shouldnt cause any issues TO get it done and it will more than likely not cause any issues to NOT GET it done. My doc told us that less and less ppl are doing because they realize its irrelevance. I guess I would not. We are TTC and I definitely will not circumsize our 2nd if it is a boy. I do not that my husband wanted his son to “look like him”. Personally I think its a lil weird why would they be comparing?? Haha! My hubby was also my first uncirumsized man I have seen..it is not disgusting or weird. Its completely NATURAL..OBVIOUSLY! Make the decision as a family don’t go by what others think. GOOD LUCK!
Don’t take what others say into consideration, do what you think is right for your son. Both my boys are done, my husband also felt strongly that we get it done, and I trusted his opinion, I am very happy that we got it done the only thing that bothers me is the anti currcumsion moms who make you feel like a horrible mother and say you have mutilated your son, some women can be so harsh when it comes to this subject, I dint agree with the percentage oF boys not being done, I know a lot more babies that have been currcumsized then that haven’t. Good luck with whatever you choose, what ever you and your husband feels is right for your son is the best decision for you, don’t let other moms make up your mind.
Hey, I’m from the UK and you’re right we don’t do it routinely. Most of the benefits can also be achieved with good hygiene and good sexual health and people have hang ups with permanently altering someone else’s genitals without their consent. HOwever I also can see its not just a physical issue…..it might be difficult for a boy if everyone else had it done and they didn’t! Jews and Muslims here still get it done easily though. Good hygiene in childhood actually amounts to doing not a lot and not trying to pull back the skin until they reach puberty (or thereabouts)….not sure if this is true but a paediatrician i worked with thought that american uncircumcised kids get more infections because there are few uncircumcised doctors so parents are advised to pull back the skin before its ready etc and this actually causes more problems. I agree its hard to get an unbiased opinion as so many people have strong opinions on it. As for pain you can request an anaesthetic. As for your husband, make sure you are happy with his reasons for why it should be done if you decide to go ahead with it. I have been with both uncircumcised and circumcised partners and both have enjoyed sex equally, although, from my limited sample size, uncircumcised men seem a little more sensitive. One partner had to be circumcised in adulthood for medical reasons and said that everything was more sensitive before. But hey, a sample size of 1 is hardly a siginficant study!
I don’t know whether it IS gross to not have it done, but I know that just about everyone I know THINKS it’s gross to not have it done. (again, not saying it IS gross…just that most people think it is!)…my hubby and son both are…they took my son out of the room to do it while I was in the hospital after I had him…and he was back in what SEEMED like minutes…could have been longer I don’t know…and he was perfectly fine!!!
Have it done! Not only so he doesn’t get judged but really due to cleanliness! Its a super quick procedure and only painful for a short time. Well worth it in the end I assure you! I admit mine was fussy after but seriously its the only way to go! Good luck with whatever decision you make :)!
In my culture its been done for thousands and thousands of years to baby boys and there has never been a problem! They do it in a way that doesn’t make the baby cry. If there are jewish or muslims in your area find a mohel or the muslim equivalent (muslim mamas help me out here! I dunno what you guys call the guy that performs the ceremony! haha) They are experts that dedicate themselves to circumcizing baby boys. That being said, I married a non-jew who is not circumsized so I didnt want my son to wonder why his penis looked different then his daddy’s! He just has to learn how to keep the area extra clean now…
I’m having a boy this time & we are having him circumsized. My cousin’s son slept through his, they numb the area. It’s much better to do it as a baby then waiting till they are older to have it done. I agree with your husband that a grown man wouldn’t want/ choose to have it done years later. My husband & all my brother’s have it done & noone remembers a thing..lol. It’s much easier to keep the area cleaner & without infections if it’s done. So there’s not argument between my husband & I about it we are definitely having it done 🙂
mark was done, but none of his kids were done and none of mine were done. Seven boys and none have ever had an issue with infection. I, for one, didnt want to inflict pain on my newborn baby because someone thinks it looks better, for two, thought it was better to give them the choice if they want it done. We dont go around taking out everyones apendix because some people have issues with it, so why would i cut my baby’s penis for the same reason. Insurance mostly doesnt cover it because its not required, its strickly for looks. They cant grow it back after its gone. It is a personal choice, but you need to do what you feel is best for your baby.If you have doubts, dont do it. If you feel its what you want, then do it.
Hello mommy! I am currently pregnant and thinking I am having a boy too. I think that having it done would be a the path id choose. I have heard that keeping clean is a problem with uncircumised penises. I have also heard that it is healthier to have it done. Now on the pain prespective I have heard that they dont use a strong aniestsia but im not too sure. I think overall its a just choice of the parents. PS – i dont know if it can be done later in life.. GOOD LUCK!
My husband isn’t circumcised and neither is my son. Neither have ever had any problems. I think its just a personal choice. I didn’t want my son to think he was different since my husband isn’t. As long as you teach them good hygiene it’s all good. And 2babiesforme—I agree with anotheryummymummy, there isn’t anything yucky or unclean about it as long as you practice good hygiene. I don’t think its fair to make such a broad statement.
****MOST women in this world…would be disgusted by a guy that wasn’t circumsized…of course different culters are different…but normal everyday women would be turned off by that…I wouldn’t do that to him…and when he is older, he WILL want to have it done…and I’m sure he’ll be really pissed you didn’t do it when he was a baby if you don’t. And again I could be wrong, but I heard somewhere that it is actually worse the older you get…good luck! I would take your hubbys advice!
I don’t know if I’m having a boy but if I do I won’t be circumcising him. When I was pregnant with my daughter my midwife told me that the incidence of it is dropping significantly- only about 40% of newborns are currently being circumcised. Circumcision originally was a religious tradition and became more wide spread. There’s no medical necessity for it. You will need to teach your son to pull the skin back & be sure it’s dry after bathing but I don’t really consider that a big deal. I’m in the US and have personally experienced 2 “uncut” men in my life. When the penis is erect there’s NO way to be able to tell so if it’s a question of embarrassment when he’s sexually active later on it’s not even an issue. Ultimately it’s a decision that needs to be made between you and your partner. I think it’s great you’re even asking the question! When you DO make a decision you’ll know you educated yourself first. Best of luck. 🙂
i am having a boy due July 1st and we def plan to have him circumcised. My insurance does cover the procedure. For me its for religious reasons and personal reasons. My husband is also circumcised and i want him to be like his daddy. My husband is the only man I have ever been with and I have never seen an uncircumcised penis so i dont really know much them.
I did not get it done for my son, but I left it up to my husband and told him if he wanted it to be done HE could pay for it because I was not. Here they do not do it until the baby is 15 days and it is done in a doctors office. We decided against it because we could not afford $350 for some doctor to mutilate him (My opinion). I also made the mistake of watching videos of how they do it and then could not do it to my son. My husband made to final decision on it and honestly I have seen no real problems so far. It is easy to clean and we have not had too many issues with it getting dirty inside yet. Honestly the foreskin does not seperate right away so it stays fairly clean, just have to wipe it down like you would a finger.
I have two circumcised sons. You can debate this forever but there is not a RIGHT answer. I frankly thought if it makes my sons like easier and it takes just a few seconds, then I would opt for circumcision. Neither one seemed to notice much and the healing is very fast. They do not seem traumatized at all. My husband’s parents waited until he was 8! for some reason – and he is traumatized but actually still glad to have had it done. I think it is socially more accepted and have one friend who told us he was teased as a boy for not having it done…. Happy with my choice.
I have one boy and am expecting my second in a couple weeks, both will be circumcised. I left it up to my husband to make the decision, he is circumcised and insisted on it. I do know that based on conversations I’ve had with people who work in nursing homes or with the elderly, I have heard a few horror stories about uncircumcised old men and the problems that they have with infections down there. I feel there are alot of pros and not too many cons regarding male circumcision.
I did my son and like you, I also debated on it. The reason we decided to is because my grandpa, who is from Europe, was not circumsized. He struggled with UTI’s all his life until finally in his 50’s he said enough was enough and was circumsized. He said it was the most painful thing he’s ever been through. Infants, from what I’ve read, don’t have the nerve endings like adults so it does not hurt them like it does an adult, and they won’t have traumatic memories like my grandfather. But this was just our opinion. I feel there is no right or wrong decision that you can make in this area.
My son is circumcised and I don’t regret it 😉 I did it cuz my bf is circumcised and because I read that first-cleaniness 2-less chances of penile cancer 3-less chances of std 4- to be the same as daddy 5- himself… I been with both circumcised and not, I prefer circ for sure…. I wouldn’t want him to be the one who isn’t and girls won’t like it…….. I didn’t like it at all…. But that’s again a personal choice
2babiesforme—I don’t think anyone lashed out at you. I only said I didn’t think it was fair to make such a broad statement. There are all kinds of nasty out there, and I doubt it has anything to do with rather they are circumcised or not. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. And for the record, I have nothing against circumcision. I’m sure if my DH was circumcised we would have had our son done to. Again, I think its a choice. I stand by what I said, and I don’t take things personally that don’t apply to me.
Carrie your about to be slaughtered from that comment lol be prepared! I changed mine. This woman asked for opinions and the other women cant handle it. I feel for you right now lol bc you are about to get hammered with comments. I find that no one can make a comment on this site without getting lashed out at. People ask questions for opinions and other people take it personally. Its sad really that we cant give our own opinions here :(!
According to that bastion of accuracy, Wikipedia, about half of newborn boys are circumcised, although more like 80% of the male population is circumcised. I’ve heard that boys are most comfortable if they are like their dads (I assume your husband is, but I am trying just to lay out the facts here, not push you one way or the other). I also agree with your husband that no male would choose to have it done later! You can, by the way, ask your hospital for anesthesia. I think they have some topical options that help. Also, if your husband really wants your son to be circumcised, I’d take that into account. Still, it’s a personal parental decision, and I don’t think there are many advantages/disadvantages one way or the other.