Ladiesin need of relationship advicea little personal!

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Okay, for those of you women who are comfortable with your post-baby body image, how do you deal with your husband/SO watching porn. Without feeling extremely jealous or inadequate? My husband and I have 3 children including a 3 mos old…and I`m afraid that I have lost all confidence in myself that I had before. We have an Kaverage

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Oops…I meant average sex life…but I can’t help but feel devastated when he watches porn..finding myself get angry at his lust for women who look better physically than I do..as if I’m not enough for him anymore. I know its a natural thing..I even do it too sometimes. For those of u who are okay with this…how do u continue feeling sexy enough after all that your body has been through? I find myself hurting over this all too often…..thanks for any advice

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Oops…I meant average sex life…but I can’t help but feel devastated when he watches porn..finding myself get angry at his lust for women who look better physically than I do..as if I’m not enough for him anymore. I know its a natural thing..I even do it too sometimes. For those of u who are okay with this…how do u continue feeling sexy enough after all that your body has been through? I find myself hurting over this all too often…..thanks for any advice

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I don’t know how to not be jealous. Mine hides it like the plague if he does it (which, let’s be honest, he most likely does.) I do tell him that I am jealous and I can’t help it and I am very open about it. Other than that, I really don’t know. 🙁 I have heard it all…about how it has nothing to do with us, everyone fantasizes and it doesn’t mean we love our SOs any less, etc and I would still go ape bananas if I caught him. Can’t help it.

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I don’t know how to not be jealous. Mine hides it like the plague if he does it (which, let’s be honest, he most likely does.) I do tell him that I am jealous and I can’t help it and I am very open about it. Other than that, I really don’t know. 🙁 I have heard it all…about how it has nothing to do with us, everyone fantasizes and it doesn’t mean we love our SOs any less, etc and I would still go ape bananas if I caught him. Can’t help it.

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i would be (and have been)super jealous. i just told him it is 100% off limits in our relationship. it does neither of us any good emotionally or relationally. he agreed and stopped. there is a background in my family that makes porn particularly devistating to me so when i brought it up he was understanding. but even if i didnt have a personal reason other than insecurity, i believe that is enough reason for him to stop. i HATE the porn industry and all that it stands for, i think that it ruins what women and men expect and desire in relationships and in themselves.

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i would be (and have been)super jealous. i just told him it is 100% off limits in our relationship. it does neither of us any good emotionally or relationally. he agreed and stopped. there is a background in my family that makes porn particularly devistating to me so when i brought it up he was understanding. but even if i didnt have a personal reason other than insecurity, i believe that is enough reason for him to stop. i HATE the porn industry and all that it stands for, i think that it ruins what women and men expect and desire in relationships and in themselves.

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My little girl is now almost 4 years old. I never had issues with my body image (but probably becasue I only have the one child), so he never resorted to porn. I’m sorry he has. Currently, he wants one more (and I just turned 39). So I am taking Vitex and Evening Primrose Oil in hopes they help.

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My little girl is now almost 4 years old. I never had issues with my body image (but probably becasue I only have the one child), so he never resorted to porn. I’m sorry he has. Currently, he wants one more (and I just turned 39). So I am taking Vitex and Evening Primrose Oil in hopes they help.

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Hey, I don’t agree with vipbaby that porn is something men resort to…..I think its just something they enjoy…ashley you mention you have even watched it yourself sometimes so you can probably appreciate it has less to do with how the women look and more to do with that it feels a bit naughty and provides visual stimulation. Personally I don’t mind it so much, so for my partner and I it isn’t an issue if he watches it sometimes. However if it upsets you then it obviously is an issue, and i think you should talk to your partner about it. If you’re comfortable with it, maybe you could try watching it together sometime? As for the body image issue, I think it is pretty normal not to look or feel as good naked after having a baby. Those who don’t have this are extremely issue. I asked my friend about this (a male friend) to get an honest opinion….he said after seeing his wife give birth he had a new found respect for her body and didn’t care that all things intimate looked and felt a bit different, so hopefully your new look bothers you more than your husband. I have invested in a few outfits that flatter my post baby figure, and when i have time bother with make up and dying my grey hairs…..the way i feel is that if i can’t look good naked i will at least look and feel good clothed!

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Hey, I don’t agree with vipbaby that porn is something men resort to…..I think its just something they enjoy…ashley you mention you have even watched it yourself sometimes so you can probably appreciate it has less to do with how the women look and more to do with that it feels a bit naughty and provides visual stimulation. Personally I don’t mind it so much, so for my partner and I it isn’t an issue if he watches it sometimes. However if it upsets you then it obviously is an issue, and i think you should talk to your partner about it. If you’re comfortable with it, maybe you could try watching it together sometime? As for the body image issue, I think it is pretty normal not to look or feel as good naked after having a baby. Those who don’t have this are extremely issue. I asked my friend about this (a male friend) to get an honest opinion….he said after seeing his wife give birth he had a new found respect for her body and didn’t care that all things intimate looked and felt a bit different, so hopefully your new look bothers you more than your husband. I have invested in a few outfits that flatter my post baby figure, and when i have time bother with make up and dying my grey hairs…..the way i feel is that if i can’t look good naked i will at least look and feel good clothed!

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LOL was typing with my girl pulling at my hands….meant to say those who don’t have this issue are extremely lucky (re body image post baby)

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LOL was typing with my girl pulling at my hands….meant to say those who don’t have this issue are extremely lucky (re body image post baby)

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i dont agree with , its just something men do. yes a fair old lot of them do. i wasnt a fan but it didnt bother me before i met my now husband. It does now i hate it. If its a case of once or twice a month fine, but because of an issue with porn when we had our first i cant stand the thought of even a few. Quite frankly i think most of the women in them arent hot at all. Its one of those things in life where it really is just down to personal choice. The best thing is to find a medium. Maybe say keep it to a minimum or even ask him to stop and once a month you’ll have a ‘fantasy night’ nothing too freaky but maybe dress up or experiment with things from ann summers lol

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i dont agree with , its just something men do. yes a fair old lot of them do. i wasnt a fan but it didnt bother me before i met my now husband. It does now i hate it. If its a case of once or twice a month fine, but because of an issue with porn when we had our first i cant stand the thought of even a few. Quite frankly i think most of the women in them arent hot at all. Its one of those things in life where it really is just down to personal choice. The best thing is to find a medium. Maybe say keep it to a minimum or even ask him to stop and once a month you’ll have a ‘fantasy night’ nothing too freaky but maybe dress up or experiment with things from ann summers lol

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I don’t really get jealous ever, but then my hubby isnt really interested in porn, i’ve always had the higher sex drive. Porn is only interesting because arousal occurs from watching a sexual act, it’s not a fantasy about the people you’re watching, it’s literally arousing to watch sex. I understand your upset if he’s more interested in porn than you, but if it’s because he’s horny and you’re not interested then it’s just a way to get in a sexual mood.

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I don’t really get jealous ever, but then my hubby isnt really interested in porn, i’ve always had the higher sex drive. Porn is only interesting because arousal occurs from watching a sexual act, it’s not a fantasy about the people you’re watching, it’s literally arousing to watch sex. I understand your upset if he’s more interested in porn than you, but if it’s because he’s horny and you’re not interested then it’s just a way to get in a sexual mood.

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Thank u so much ladies….it comforts me to know that I am not alone in this!! I think it has more to do with my insecurities than anything. He’s a great husband and father…I just wish that I was ALL he needed.

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Thank u so much ladies….it comforts me to know that I am not alone in this!! I think it has more to do with my insecurities than anything. He’s a great husband and father…I just wish that I was ALL he needed.

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Ick, I hate the ‘men will do it because they are men ‘ excuse. No, I refuse to give men an excuse to be pigs simply because they have a dick. Also, they are only getting excited seeing the act being done is also bullshit. You think they’d be just as turne on if it was a 500pound woman being screwed on the screen? Don’t think so.watching porn only makes men have ridiculous expectations and watching porn will usually also lead to live web cam chats to strip clubs to prostitutes. I do not accept porn, I am right here. Why would he need someone else when I am perfectly functioning right over here. It is not ok to me at all nor will it ever be. Sorry your man is putting you second and making you feel this way. Talk to him about how it makes you feel and MAYBE he will stop. Good luck.

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Ick, I hate the ‘men will do it because they are men ‘ excuse. No, I refuse to give men an excuse to be pigs simply because they have a dick. Also, they are only getting excited seeing the act being done is also bullshit. You think they’d be just as turne on if it was a 500pound woman being screwed on the screen? Don’t think so.watching porn only makes men have ridiculous expectations and watching porn will usually also lead to live web cam chats to strip clubs to prostitutes. I do not accept porn, I am right here. Why would he need someone else when I am perfectly functioning right over here. It is not ok to me at all nor will it ever be. Sorry your man is putting you second and making you feel this way. Talk to him about how it makes you feel and MAYBE he will stop. Good luck.

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my bf stopped watching porn when he got with me, but continued to look at pics. It took a year for me to find out and when I did, wow, it was quite a scene. I’m the kind of person who just simply isn’t comfortable with it. I feel like if he needs to watch that or see those pics hes getting something out of it that he should be getting from me. Which makes me feel inadequate and unwanted. But I also have pretty demanding opinions about sexuality and everything to do with it, comes from being a psych junky I spose. Lets just say I read into every aspect of it, including what it means when it comes to the rest of his thought patterns, the way he looks at other people and the way he looks at sexuality(which I consider very sacred). So I dunno if every woman should take it as hard as I do, but I can’t help how I feel. My man watching porn would make me feel betrayed. And that whole men are sexually weak, they can’t help it, and all that crap, well I have to call BS on that. I think it’s just an excuse for them to not have to step up and grow up. I guess what I’m getting from your question is that it bothers you,and its having a toll on your happiness and self-esteem. To me this says that you need to do something about it, don’t be afraid to ask him to stop, its not too much to ask and it can wonders for your sex life, confidence levels etc. This also means that you would have to stop doing it as well of course, and make a commitment to each other to both stop. One or both of you might fall off the wagon once or even twice, it happens, but just be honest with each other about it and continue moving forward. Two good rules that my bf and I live by in our relationship are: Don’t do anything behind my back that you wouldn’t do in front of me, and don’t get anything outside of our relationship that you should be getting within it. And if you do break the rules, be honest about it, don’t hide it. Thats the key to trust and getting past this issue. I may be going out on a limb here, but just in case you’re interested there’s also a very helpful video by debbie ford called “the shadow effect” which helped me and my bf to understand the issue of porn watching much more deeply, and helped us solve the problem from its very origin. here’s a link to the trailer:
http://store.debbieford.com/product_info.php?products_id=16
anyway, the decision is yours, just do what you feel is right for you and your relationship. But don’t be afraid to take control of the situation, explore the issue, and do what needs to be done for YOU to be happy.

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my bf stopped watching porn when he got with me, but continued to look at pics. It took a year for me to find out and when I did, wow, it was quite a scene. I’m the kind of person who just simply isn’t comfortable with it. I feel like if he needs to watch that or see those pics hes getting something out of it that he should be getting from me. Which makes me feel inadequate and unwanted. But I also have pretty demanding opinions about sexuality and everything to do with it, comes from being a psych junky I spose. Lets just say I read into every aspect of it, including what it means when it comes to the rest of his thought patterns, the way he looks at other people and the way he looks at sexuality(which I consider very sacred). So I dunno if every woman should take it as hard as I do, but I can’t help how I feel. My man watching porn would make me feel betrayed. And that whole men are sexually weak, they can’t help it, and all that crap, well I have to call BS on that. I think it’s just an excuse for them to not have to step up and grow up. I guess what I’m getting from your question is that it bothers you,and its having a toll on your happiness and self-esteem. To me this says that you need to do something about it, don’t be afraid to ask him to stop, its not too much to ask and it can wonders for your sex life, confidence levels etc. This also means that you would have to stop doing it as well of course, and make a commitment to each other to both stop. One or both of you might fall off the wagon once or even twice, it happens, but just be honest with each other about it and continue moving forward. Two good rules that my bf and I live by in our relationship are: Don’t do anything behind my back that you wouldn’t do in front of me, and don’t get anything outside of our relationship that you should be getting within it. And if you do break the rules, be honest about it, don’t hide it. Thats the key to trust and getting past this issue. I may be going out on a limb here, but just in case you’re interested there’s also a very helpful video by debbie ford called “the shadow effect” which helped me and my bf to understand the issue of porn watching much more deeply, and helped us solve the problem from its very origin. here’s a link to the trailer:
http://store.debbieford.com/product_info.php?products_id=16
anyway, the decision is yours, just do what you feel is right for you and your relationship. But don’t be afraid to take control of the situation, explore the issue, and do what needs to be done for YOU to be happy.

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i watch porn, and i have never been on web cam live chats let alone visited a prostitute! Neither has my partner. For me and my partner it is certainly just an extra……we both find it enjoyable to watch other people but wouldn’t want to actually involve real live other people in our sex lives (lol even if we did would be pretty impossible as parents!). Obviously if it is something he needs rather than just enjoys, or if he wont’ stop when you ask, that’s an issue, but i don’t think porn in itself is always a sign of a problem.

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i watch porn, and i have never been on web cam live chats let alone visited a prostitute! Neither has my partner. For me and my partner it is certainly just an extra……we both find it enjoyable to watch other people but wouldn’t want to actually involve real live other people in our sex lives (lol even if we did would be pretty impossible as parents!). Obviously if it is something he needs rather than just enjoys, or if he wont’ stop when you ask, that’s an issue, but i don’t think porn in itself is always a sign of a problem.

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I’ve been with my husband for 4 years and we are now expecting our second child. When I first got with him and found out he was looking at porn I almost left him..thats how mad/jealous I was. He has continued to do it and now it still bothers me just not as much. I wish he would stop but there is nothing I can do.

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I’ve been with my husband for 4 years and we are now expecting our second child. When I first got with him and found out he was looking at porn I almost left him..thats how mad/jealous I was. He has continued to do it and now it still bothers me just not as much. I wish he would stop but there is nothing I can do.

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i watch porn, so does he (2 kids, 6 yrs later). some people are more sexually open then others and, to be quite frank, you don’t just wake up one morning and watch it, he mustve done it before you met. So, if you didnt get upset then, you have no right to get upset now. He loves you, hes with you, him watching porn has no bearing on that, it won’t make him cheat, it won’t make him stray, any man who DOES and blames the porn would’ve done it porn or no porn, the porn merely becomes to EXCUSE.

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i watch porn, so does he (2 kids, 6 yrs later). some people are more sexually open then others and, to be quite frank, you don’t just wake up one morning and watch it, he mustve done it before you met. So, if you didnt get upset then, you have no right to get upset now. He loves you, hes with you, him watching porn has no bearing on that, it won’t make him cheat, it won’t make him stray, any man who DOES and blames the porn would’ve done it porn or no porn, the porn merely becomes to EXCUSE.

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Also,undoubtedlty, you have insecurities about your post-baby body and bits (I’m a 2x mum, so I know, trust me!!!) and that won’t go away just coz he doesn’t watch porn. It will be something else that makes you paranoid/gets you upset. Your baby is only 3 months old. Everything will fall into place within 4 or 5 months. First 6 months is the hardest with babies.

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Also,undoubtedlty, you have insecurities about your post-baby body and bits (I’m a 2x mum, so I know, trust me!!!) and that won’t go away just coz he doesn’t watch porn. It will be something else that makes you paranoid/gets you upset. Your baby is only 3 months old. Everything will fall into place within 4 or 5 months. First 6 months is the hardest with babies.

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This is totally my OPINION, but i def dont think is appropiate to watch porn in front of your spouse unless is a mutual desire, but the fact that he is doing it and you know it and it bothers you is not right to me, and you have the right to get jealous because is your husband and hes looking at another person, im not too sure about they are not getting pleasure out of it because if that wasnt the case they shoudnt be watching it, it just gives them an idea of what a perfect body looks like and what awesome sex should be, i think that instead of men watching porn they should be trying to experience things on their own. (on the other side again my opinion, but if a guy gets horny from watching that then obviously they are getting something out of it, i would never have sex with a guy who got horny by some tramp and not from me) . I know they want to say men are men and thats what they do, but i think being discreet is very important to the partner that doesnt approve it. My OPINION

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This is totally my OPINION, but i def dont think is appropiate to watch porn in front of your spouse unless is a mutual desire, but the fact that he is doing it and you know it and it bothers you is not right to me, and you have the right to get jealous because is your husband and hes looking at another person, im not too sure about they are not getting pleasure out of it because if that wasnt the case they shoudnt be watching it, it just gives them an idea of what a perfect body looks like and what awesome sex should be, i think that instead of men watching porn they should be trying to experience things on their own. (on the other side again my opinion, but if a guy gets horny from watching that then obviously they are getting something out of it, i would never have sex with a guy who got horny by some tramp and not from me) . I know they want to say men are men and thats what they do, but i think being discreet is very important to the partner that doesnt approve it. My OPINION

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My honest opinion, I would rather my honey enjoy watching porn then experimenting with someone else. We watch porn together as well as on our own free time since we like different things.. I know my man is honest with me about everything including the stuff I would rather not know, he also works all the time and we have different schedules some days. You know for one … everyone enjoys sex and/or pressuring themselves every once in awhile. I would over look it and think about the positives that could come out of it; new positions, if your tired send him to the computer, and more then anything he might like watching something you really don’t like doing and it’s away you can get out of it.

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My honest opinion, I would rather my honey enjoy watching porn then experimenting with someone else. We watch porn together as well as on our own free time since we like different things.. I know my man is honest with me about everything including the stuff I would rather not know, he also works all the time and we have different schedules some days. You know for one … everyone enjoys sex and/or pressuring themselves every once in awhile. I would over look it and think about the positives that could come out of it; new positions, if your tired send him to the computer, and more then anything he might like watching something you really don’t like doing and it’s away you can get out of it.

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For men (and a LOT of women) seeing two people (or more) have sex, is a turn on…doesn’t have to be super beautiful women…it just is. Usually the women in porn are hot…but that doesn’t mean that THAT is what is turning him on. Do yourself a favor….google, “hot naked firemen” lol…check out all the sexy ripped guys on there….then…walk away and tell me if you look at your husband ANY differently!!! It’s not about comparing these people to the one you’re with…you can look at hot guys all day long…nake ones with perfect bodies and big huge you know whats…and you are not going to think any differently of the man you love. We all check out people of the opposite sex…it’s a part of life and it’s in our nature…maybe men a little more than women…as long as you are still turning your husband on and he still wants to have sex with you, it’s perfectly natural for him to watch porn and stuff and it not affect your relationship. Don’t worry…just don’t think about it…of course there is going to be a little jealousy when you dwell on it…just know that your man has probably been watching porn for as long as he’s been able to lol…this is nothing new to him…he loves you, he wants to be with you…if he didn’t, he wouldn’t…simple as that. And when you are feeling man or bitter about it…go check out some hot men lol and you’ll feel better! 🙂 <3 If you ever want to vent you can message me I have been to hell and back dealing with jealousy issues and stuff and I have overcome them by realizing that there is just no room in my life for it...I have a wonderful husband that loves me and cares for me and would never cheat on me who happens to love watching porn 🙂 It's not a big deal...don't make it something it's not.

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For men (and a LOT of women) seeing two people (or more) have sex, is a turn on…doesn’t have to be super beautiful women…it just is. Usually the women in porn are hot…but that doesn’t mean that THAT is what is turning him on. Do yourself a favor….google, “hot naked firemen” lol…check out all the sexy ripped guys on there….then…walk away and tell me if you look at your husband ANY differently!!! It’s not about comparing these people to the one you’re with…you can look at hot guys all day long…nake ones with perfect bodies and big huge you know whats…and you are not going to think any differently of the man you love. We all check out people of the opposite sex…it’s a part of life and it’s in our nature…maybe men a little more than women…as long as you are still turning your husband on and he still wants to have sex with you, it’s perfectly natural for him to watch porn and stuff and it not affect your relationship. Don’t worry…just don’t think about it…of course there is going to be a little jealousy when you dwell on it…just know that your man has probably been watching porn for as long as he’s been able to lol…this is nothing new to him…he loves you, he wants to be with you…if he didn’t, he wouldn’t…simple as that. And when you are feeling man or bitter about it…go check out some hot men lol and you’ll feel better! 🙂 <3 If you ever want to vent you can message me I have been to hell and back dealing with jealousy issues and stuff and I have overcome them by realizing that there is just no room in my life for it...I have a wonderful husband that loves me and cares for me and would never cheat on me who happens to love watching porn 🙂 It's not a big deal...don't make it something it's not.

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Just to add—women have this idea in their heads of what they should look like because of what we are told we should look like….noone is perfect—just because your body isn’t what it used to be…it doesn’t mean you are not sexy. Even for women who are really big…so what? You have girl parts, men have men parts…you put them together and it feels great! Men don’t just need perfect bodies to get excited! As long as your husband can still “get it up” being with you, then you are turning him on just fine and you shouldn’t worry about a thing! You should SEE my stomach! Well my body for that matter—-I am covered ALL OVER with horrible bright red stretch marks, I have a horrible c-section flabby loose skinned belly with layers of fat all around and a ton of cellulite! But so what? I kiss my husband in the right places and touch him the right way and he can’t get enough of me….you are putting way to much pressure on yourself to be perfect and I’ll tell you what—confidence is the sexiest thing to a man…doesn’t matter if you are perfect or not…

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Just to add—women have this idea in their heads of what they should look like because of what we are told we should look like….noone is perfect—just because your body isn’t what it used to be…it doesn’t mean you are not sexy. Even for women who are really big…so what? You have girl parts, men have men parts…you put them together and it feels great! Men don’t just need perfect bodies to get excited! As long as your husband can still “get it up” being with you, then you are turning him on just fine and you shouldn’t worry about a thing! You should SEE my stomach! Well my body for that matter—-I am covered ALL OVER with horrible bright red stretch marks, I have a horrible c-section flabby loose skinned belly with layers of fat all around and a ton of cellulite! But so what? I kiss my husband in the right places and touch him the right way and he can’t get enough of me….you are putting way to much pressure on yourself to be perfect and I’ll tell you what—confidence is the sexiest thing to a man…doesn’t matter if you are perfect or not…

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and for the record—I watch and love porn…into completely different porn than my husband (I prefer more soft core stuff)…but I love it…and it HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM—some people bothered me with their comments because I’m a WOMAN who enjoys watching porn and the feeling of “taking care of it on your own” is COMPLETELY different than having sex….I can have sex every day for a week and then still feel the urge to do it by myself for the night…not because I’m not satisfied, just because it’s a personal feeling that I enjoy and I love it…also, it doesn’t make me want my husband any less…I can watch porn and have sex in the same day, the two are not related. It’s not personal….people that disagree with this are either 1. people who do not watch porn or masterbate and therefor do not understand at all or 2. people who are in or have been in bad relationships or suffering ones where the men WOULD resort to porn because they were not intimate with their wives for one reason or another…but that’s not the norm…most people just watch porn because it turns them on that that’s that…nothing personal…sorry for all the rants but I just want you to feel better about it

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and for the record—I watch and love porn…into completely different porn than my husband (I prefer more soft core stuff)…but I love it…and it HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM—some people bothered me with their comments because I’m a WOMAN who enjoys watching porn and the feeling of “taking care of it on your own” is COMPLETELY different than having sex….I can have sex every day for a week and then still feel the urge to do it by myself for the night…not because I’m not satisfied, just because it’s a personal feeling that I enjoy and I love it…also, it doesn’t make me want my husband any less…I can watch porn and have sex in the same day, the two are not related. It’s not personal….people that disagree with this are either 1. people who do not watch porn or masterbate and therefor do not understand at all or 2. people who are in or have been in bad relationships or suffering ones where the men WOULD resort to porn because they were not intimate with their wives for one reason or another…but that’s not the norm…most people just watch porn because it turns them on that that’s that…nothing personal…sorry for all the rants but I just want you to feel better about it

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i dont agree with ANYONE watching porn if they are in a relationship. sorry, but I find it disgusting. If a person is totally happy with their partner, why the heck do they need to look at other peoples genitals? Its WRONG.

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i dont agree with ANYONE watching porn if they are in a relationship. sorry, but I find it disgusting. If a person is totally happy with their partner, why the heck do they need to look at other peoples genitals? Its WRONG.

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For the while thing that men are men and that’s just what they do. I’ve had slot of boyfriends who have used that excuse, and my husband now doesn’t watch not have any interest in porn. He’s very monogamous, and I’m very grateful for that, because I would personally feel inadequate too. Try explaining and talking to him about it. or maybe get a but daring in the bedroom, spice it up try to do something intimate every night, suprise him, be sexy and feel sexy. It’s sure to get his attention and add a spark to your love life and keep your marriage alive.

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For the while thing that men are men and that’s just what they do. I’ve had slot of boyfriends who have used that excuse, and my husband now doesn’t watch not have any interest in porn. He’s very monogamous, and I’m very grateful for that, because I would personally feel inadequate too. Try explaining and talking to him about it. or maybe get a but daring in the bedroom, spice it up try to do something intimate every night, suprise him, be sexy and feel sexy. It’s sure to get his attention and add a spark to your love life and keep your marriage alive.

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sorry if tmi I just think that if anyone in a marriage has the urge to have an orgasm and their partner isn’t in the mood, or is tired then it’s still totally acceptable to have that orgasm and to enjoy a sexual thrill from it. I found out that my husband would sneak off to the bathroom in the night if I fallen asleep and be embarrassed about it. I was like, you wally you have needs too don’t feel ashamed! If your partner has a sexual need and you aren’t in the mood then it’s really unfair to curb it. If you are in the mood then it should be together, but if you aren’t then you can’t expect them to dance to your tune. Watching a bit of porn just helps get the juices flowing quicker. As soon as he’s finished he’d turn it straight off |I imagine. If it’s the focus of his sexuality then that’s a problem, if it isn’t then stop stressing out.

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sorry if tmi I just think that if anyone in a marriage has the urge to have an orgasm and their partner isn’t in the mood, or is tired then it’s still totally acceptable to have that orgasm and to enjoy a sexual thrill from it. I found out that my husband would sneak off to the bathroom in the night if I fallen asleep and be embarrassed about it. I was like, you wally you have needs too don’t feel ashamed! If your partner has a sexual need and you aren’t in the mood then it’s really unfair to curb it. If you are in the mood then it should be together, but if you aren’t then you can’t expect them to dance to your tune. Watching a bit of porn just helps get the juices flowing quicker. As soon as he’s finished he’d turn it straight off |I imagine. If it’s the focus of his sexuality then that’s a problem, if it isn’t then stop stressing out.

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Porn will take you further than you want to go. The very words of Jesus are that He who looks after a woman to lust after her has commited adultery with her already in his heart. It is not right, even if it is “normal”.

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Porn will take you further than you want to go. The very words of Jesus are that He who looks after a woman to lust after her has commited adultery with her already in his heart. It is not right, even if it is “normal”.

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There are 2 debates here, Porn and Body image. I understand how 1 can affect the other, as u feel less confident in ur own skin it plays on ur insecurities of ur relationship. Personally I am ok with porn, I love my body, and I know my husband does. We have a healthy sex life and totally trust each other. I think if I wasn’t so confident, porn may affect me as I wud feel I was failing my husband so I would work on changing my body (hitting the gym) and mind (i mean how amazing is ur body to produce a baby) as this would increase ur confidence, therefore reduce ur insecurities???? I do think a women’s body is amazing- and I think positive mental attitude helps, I think it just takes time for u to adapt to ur body’s changes, but u will get there.

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There are 2 debates here, Porn and Body image. I understand how 1 can affect the other, as u feel less confident in ur own skin it plays on ur insecurities of ur relationship. Personally I am ok with porn, I love my body, and I know my husband does. We have a healthy sex life and totally trust each other. I think if I wasn’t so confident, porn may affect me as I wud feel I was failing my husband so I would work on changing my body (hitting the gym) and mind (i mean how amazing is ur body to produce a baby) as this would increase ur confidence, therefore reduce ur insecurities???? I do think a women’s body is amazing- and I think positive mental attitude helps, I think it just takes time for u to adapt to ur body’s changes, but u will get there.

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lol…this is not a debate on whether or not porn is acceptable…answer the question asked or skip it….lol at the monogamous statement…just because people watch porn, doesn’t mean people are going to be with other men or women! I assure you.., my husband and I BOTH watch porn and are completely monogamous as well! ANywho, again, not an arguement, any man that says he doesn’t watch porn is probably lying lol…but whatever helps you sleep at night. Ashley—I am scared of an arguement so if you have anything to say to me please private message me I don’t want to come back to this question and get annoyed :/

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lol…this is not a debate on whether or not porn is acceptable…answer the question asked or skip it….lol at the monogamous statement…just because people watch porn, doesn’t mean people are going to be with other men or women! I assure you.., my husband and I BOTH watch porn and are completely monogamous as well! ANywho, again, not an arguement, any man that says he doesn’t watch porn is probably lying lol…but whatever helps you sleep at night. Ashley—I am scared of an arguement so if you have anything to say to me please private message me I don’t want to come back to this question and get annoyed :/

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you should not lose confidence. boys will be boys. he’s certainly not watching porn because of you and your body. its easier! he doesn’t have to please anyone but himself in that moment! every womans body changes after a baby. My personal story – I was about 30 lbs over weight when i got pregnant with my son, now i’m 100 lbs over weight and about in a month I will be having bybass surgery. FOR MYSELF, not for my bf. (he actually doesn’t see anything wrong with me). you shouldn’t feel jealous or inadequate that he’s taking fast food over a gormet meal sometimes, we all do!
i definitely agree with some of these other moms. do things that will make YOU feel better about YOU. Go the gym …buy sexy things (when you’re ready)….buy clothes that compliment the body you have now. you will start feel better about yourself and it read across to everyone, expecially him, and that could become sexier to him than porn!

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you should not lose confidence. boys will be boys. he’s certainly not watching porn because of you and your body. its easier! he doesn’t have to please anyone but himself in that moment! every womans body changes after a baby. My personal story – I was about 30 lbs over weight when i got pregnant with my son, now i’m 100 lbs over weight and about in a month I will be having bybass surgery. FOR MYSELF, not for my bf. (he actually doesn’t see anything wrong with me). you shouldn’t feel jealous or inadequate that he’s taking fast food over a gormet meal sometimes, we all do!
i definitely agree with some of these other moms. do things that will make YOU feel better about YOU. Go the gym …buy sexy things (when you’re ready)….buy clothes that compliment the body you have now. you will start feel better about yourself and it read across to everyone, expecially him, and that could become sexier to him than porn!

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Porn stars arent attractive either, seriously, don’t get jealous/upset. Life’s too short. Men are visual, women not so much. Do you ever catch your man trying to watch himself slide in and out of you??? Just an example. Trust me. It really isn’t a big deal. Please give yourself a break. You are beautiful, and he thinks so too. =) Talk to him though. Let HIM reassure you!

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Porn stars arent attractive either, seriously, don’t get jealous/upset. Life’s too short. Men are visual, women not so much. Do you ever catch your man trying to watch himself slide in and out of you??? Just an example. Trust me. It really isn’t a big deal. Please give yourself a break. You are beautiful, and he thinks so too. =) Talk to him though. Let HIM reassure you!

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yayfornumber2 <<< I can assure you darl, my hubby DIOES NOT watch porn and he is no liar thank you. Neither of us have watched porn (or feel the need to) since we've been in a relationship. We have a VERY active sex life and love to explore eachother. Why the heck would ANYONE want to go off and have a wank (sorry) over a fake person/book/magazine when they have their partner to give lovin too? If the woman is tired and the man is in the "mood" then if he loved her & respected her, he'd understand that and just hold off until they were BOTH ready. I guess my hubby & I are just lucky to have that very active sex life and we love eachothers bodies. And have no need to go and look at filth 🙂

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yayfornumber2 <<< I can assure you darl, my hubby DIOES NOT watch porn and he is no liar thank you. Neither of us have watched porn (or feel the need to) since we've been in a relationship. We have a VERY active sex life and love to explore eachother. Why the heck would ANYONE want to go off and have a wank (sorry) over a fake person/book/magazine when they have their partner to give lovin too? If the woman is tired and the man is in the "mood" then if he loved her & respected her, he'd understand that and just hold off until they were BOTH ready. I guess my hubby & I are just lucky to have that very active sex life and we love eachothers bodies. And have no need to go and look at filth 🙂

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weber3 <<< well said and I agree 100%

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weber3 <<< well said and I agree 100%

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Just for the fun of it and out of curiousity i have 2 brother, who one is 17 and the other is 23 both in a relationship, and their answer to watching porn was, if you are turned on by your partner then their is no need to watch it and mostly in front of them. They both said is respect to their partners and not because they are punks or dont like it, is just very disrespectful, funny how they want to say men or men and thats what they do and 2 young men said other wise, to me i agree with weber3 also, porn was not intended by God and if thats so then is wrong, everyone has their own opinion, all i got to say is NEVER say NEVER, seen to many girls bet on their husband/boyfriend being faithful and those have been the firsts ones to have a double life.

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Just for the fun of it and out of curiousity i have 2 brother, who one is 17 and the other is 23 both in a relationship, and their answer to watching porn was, if you are turned on by your partner then their is no need to watch it and mostly in front of them. They both said is respect to their partners and not because they are punks or dont like it, is just very disrespectful, funny how they want to say men or men and thats what they do and 2 young men said other wise, to me i agree with weber3 also, porn was not intended by God and if thats so then is wrong, everyone has their own opinion, all i got to say is NEVER say NEVER, seen to many girls bet on their husband/boyfriend being faithful and those have been the firsts ones to have a double life.

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I have no problems with porn and my hubby only watches it with me becasue I find it a turn on as well. I’ve had cancer, both my breasts removed, a giant scar on my belly from having a DIEP (google it if you want to know what it is) and so I have had a pretty poor body image before I got boobs back but never felt inadequete because of the porn ladies. We only watch it a few times a year when the mood strikes us. We are very committeed to each other and have been for 8yrs

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I have no problems with porn and my hubby only watches it with me becasue I find it a turn on as well. I’ve had cancer, both my breasts removed, a giant scar on my belly from having a DIEP (google it if you want to know what it is) and so I have had a pretty poor body image before I got boobs back but never felt inadequete because of the porn ladies. We only watch it a few times a year when the mood strikes us. We are very committeed to each other and have been for 8yrs

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Thank you ladies for all your feedback!!

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Thank you ladies for all your feedback!!

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Okay, for those of you women who are comfortable with your post-baby body image, how do you deal with your husband/SO watching porn. Without feeling extremely jealous or inadequate? My husband and I have 3 children including a 3 mos old…and I`m afraid that I have lost all confidence in myself that I had before. We have an Kaverage

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Oops…I meant average sex life…but I can’t help but feel devastated when he watches porn..finding myself get angry at his lust for women who look better physically than I do..as if I’m not enough for him anymore. I know its a natural thing..I even do it too sometimes. For those of u who are okay with this…how do u continue feeling sexy enough after all that your body has been through? I find myself hurting over this all too often…..thanks for any advice

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Oops…I meant average sex life…but I can’t help but feel devastated when he watches porn..finding myself get angry at his lust for women who look better physically than I do..as if I’m not enough for him anymore. I know its a natural thing..I even do it too sometimes. For those of u who are okay with this…how do u continue feeling sexy enough after all that your body has been through? I find myself hurting over this all too often…..thanks for any advice

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I don’t know how to not be jealous. Mine hides it like the plague if he does it (which, let’s be honest, he most likely does.) I do tell him that I am jealous and I can’t help it and I am very open about it. Other than that, I really don’t know. 🙁 I have heard it all…about how it has nothing to do with us, everyone fantasizes and it doesn’t mean we love our SOs any less, etc and I would still go ape bananas if I caught him. Can’t help it.

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I don’t know how to not be jealous. Mine hides it like the plague if he does it (which, let’s be honest, he most likely does.) I do tell him that I am jealous and I can’t help it and I am very open about it. Other than that, I really don’t know. 🙁 I have heard it all…about how it has nothing to do with us, everyone fantasizes and it doesn’t mean we love our SOs any less, etc and I would still go ape bananas if I caught him. Can’t help it.

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i would be (and have been)super jealous. i just told him it is 100% off limits in our relationship. it does neither of us any good emotionally or relationally. he agreed and stopped. there is a background in my family that makes porn particularly devistating to me so when i brought it up he was understanding. but even if i didnt have a personal reason other than insecurity, i believe that is enough reason for him to stop. i HATE the porn industry and all that it stands for, i think that it ruins what women and men expect and desire in relationships and in themselves.

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i would be (and have been)super jealous. i just told him it is 100% off limits in our relationship. it does neither of us any good emotionally or relationally. he agreed and stopped. there is a background in my family that makes porn particularly devistating to me so when i brought it up he was understanding. but even if i didnt have a personal reason other than insecurity, i believe that is enough reason for him to stop. i HATE the porn industry and all that it stands for, i think that it ruins what women and men expect and desire in relationships and in themselves.

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My little girl is now almost 4 years old. I never had issues with my body image (but probably becasue I only have the one child), so he never resorted to porn. I’m sorry he has. Currently, he wants one more (and I just turned 39). So I am taking Vitex and Evening Primrose Oil in hopes they help.

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My little girl is now almost 4 years old. I never had issues with my body image (but probably becasue I only have the one child), so he never resorted to porn. I’m sorry he has. Currently, he wants one more (and I just turned 39). So I am taking Vitex and Evening Primrose Oil in hopes they help.

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Hey, I don’t agree with vipbaby that porn is something men resort to…..I think its just something they enjoy…ashley you mention you have even watched it yourself sometimes so you can probably appreciate it has less to do with how the women look and more to do with that it feels a bit naughty and provides visual stimulation. Personally I don’t mind it so much, so for my partner and I it isn’t an issue if he watches it sometimes. However if it upsets you then it obviously is an issue, and i think you should talk to your partner about it. If you’re comfortable with it, maybe you could try watching it together sometime? As for the body image issue, I think it is pretty normal not to look or feel as good naked after having a baby. Those who don’t have this are extremely issue. I asked my friend about this (a male friend) to get an honest opinion….he said after seeing his wife give birth he had a new found respect for her body and didn’t care that all things intimate looked and felt a bit different, so hopefully your new look bothers you more than your husband. I have invested in a few outfits that flatter my post baby figure, and when i have time bother with make up and dying my grey hairs…..the way i feel is that if i can’t look good naked i will at least look and feel good clothed!

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Hey, I don’t agree with vipbaby that porn is something men resort to…..I think its just something they enjoy…ashley you mention you have even watched it yourself sometimes so you can probably appreciate it has less to do with how the women look and more to do with that it feels a bit naughty and provides visual stimulation. Personally I don’t mind it so much, so for my partner and I it isn’t an issue if he watches it sometimes. However if it upsets you then it obviously is an issue, and i think you should talk to your partner about it. If you’re comfortable with it, maybe you could try watching it together sometime? As for the body image issue, I think it is pretty normal not to look or feel as good naked after having a baby. Those who don’t have this are extremely issue. I asked my friend about this (a male friend) to get an honest opinion….he said after seeing his wife give birth he had a new found respect for her body and didn’t care that all things intimate looked and felt a bit different, so hopefully your new look bothers you more than your husband. I have invested in a few outfits that flatter my post baby figure, and when i have time bother with make up and dying my grey hairs…..the way i feel is that if i can’t look good naked i will at least look and feel good clothed!

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LOL was typing with my girl pulling at my hands….meant to say those who don’t have this issue are extremely lucky (re body image post baby)

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LOL was typing with my girl pulling at my hands….meant to say those who don’t have this issue are extremely lucky (re body image post baby)

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i dont agree with , its just something men do. yes a fair old lot of them do. i wasnt a fan but it didnt bother me before i met my now husband. It does now i hate it. If its a case of once or twice a month fine, but because of an issue with porn when we had our first i cant stand the thought of even a few. Quite frankly i think most of the women in them arent hot at all. Its one of those things in life where it really is just down to personal choice. The best thing is to find a medium. Maybe say keep it to a minimum or even ask him to stop and once a month you’ll have a ‘fantasy night’ nothing too freaky but maybe dress up or experiment with things from ann summers lol

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i dont agree with , its just something men do. yes a fair old lot of them do. i wasnt a fan but it didnt bother me before i met my now husband. It does now i hate it. If its a case of once or twice a month fine, but because of an issue with porn when we had our first i cant stand the thought of even a few. Quite frankly i think most of the women in them arent hot at all. Its one of those things in life where it really is just down to personal choice. The best thing is to find a medium. Maybe say keep it to a minimum or even ask him to stop and once a month you’ll have a ‘fantasy night’ nothing too freaky but maybe dress up or experiment with things from ann summers lol

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I don’t really get jealous ever, but then my hubby isnt really interested in porn, i’ve always had the higher sex drive. Porn is only interesting because arousal occurs from watching a sexual act, it’s not a fantasy about the people you’re watching, it’s literally arousing to watch sex. I understand your upset if he’s more interested in porn than you, but if it’s because he’s horny and you’re not interested then it’s just a way to get in a sexual mood.

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I don’t really get jealous ever, but then my hubby isnt really interested in porn, i’ve always had the higher sex drive. Porn is only interesting because arousal occurs from watching a sexual act, it’s not a fantasy about the people you’re watching, it’s literally arousing to watch sex. I understand your upset if he’s more interested in porn than you, but if it’s because he’s horny and you’re not interested then it’s just a way to get in a sexual mood.

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Thank u so much ladies….it comforts me to know that I am not alone in this!! I think it has more to do with my insecurities than anything. He’s a great husband and father…I just wish that I was ALL he needed.

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Thank u so much ladies….it comforts me to know that I am not alone in this!! I think it has more to do with my insecurities than anything. He’s a great husband and father…I just wish that I was ALL he needed.

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Ick, I hate the ‘men will do it because they are men ‘ excuse. No, I refuse to give men an excuse to be pigs simply because they have a dick. Also, they are only getting excited seeing the act being done is also bullshit. You think they’d be just as turne on if it was a 500pound woman being screwed on the screen? Don’t think so.watching porn only makes men have ridiculous expectations and watching porn will usually also lead to live web cam chats to strip clubs to prostitutes. I do not accept porn, I am right here. Why would he need someone else when I am perfectly functioning right over here. It is not ok to me at all nor will it ever be. Sorry your man is putting you second and making you feel this way. Talk to him about how it makes you feel and MAYBE he will stop. Good luck.

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Ick, I hate the ‘men will do it because they are men ‘ excuse. No, I refuse to give men an excuse to be pigs simply because they have a dick. Also, they are only getting excited seeing the act being done is also bullshit. You think they’d be just as turne on if it was a 500pound woman being screwed on the screen? Don’t think so.watching porn only makes men have ridiculous expectations and watching porn will usually also lead to live web cam chats to strip clubs to prostitutes. I do not accept porn, I am right here. Why would he need someone else when I am perfectly functioning right over here. It is not ok to me at all nor will it ever be. Sorry your man is putting you second and making you feel this way. Talk to him about how it makes you feel and MAYBE he will stop. Good luck.

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my bf stopped watching porn when he got with me, but continued to look at pics. It took a year for me to find out and when I did, wow, it was quite a scene. I’m the kind of person who just simply isn’t comfortable with it. I feel like if he needs to watch that or see those pics hes getting something out of it that he should be getting from me. Which makes me feel inadequate and unwanted. But I also have pretty demanding opinions about sexuality and everything to do with it, comes from being a psych junky I spose. Lets just say I read into every aspect of it, including what it means when it comes to the rest of his thought patterns, the way he looks at other people and the way he looks at sexuality(which I consider very sacred). So I dunno if every woman should take it as hard as I do, but I can’t help how I feel. My man watching porn would make me feel betrayed. And that whole men are sexually weak, they can’t help it, and all that crap, well I have to call BS on that. I think it’s just an excuse for them to not have to step up and grow up. I guess what I’m getting from your question is that it bothers you,and its having a toll on your happiness and self-esteem. To me this says that you need to do something about it, don’t be afraid to ask him to stop, its not too much to ask and it can wonders for your sex life, confidence levels etc. This also means that you would have to stop doing it as well of course, and make a commitment to each other to both stop. One or both of you might fall off the wagon once or even twice, it happens, but just be honest with each other about it and continue moving forward. Two good rules that my bf and I live by in our relationship are: Don’t do anything behind my back that you wouldn’t do in front of me, and don’t get anything outside of our relationship that you should be getting within it. And if you do break the rules, be honest about it, don’t hide it. Thats the key to trust and getting past this issue. I may be going out on a limb here, but just in case you’re interested there’s also a very helpful video by debbie ford called “the shadow effect” which helped me and my bf to understand the issue of porn watching much more deeply, and helped us solve the problem from its very origin. here’s a link to the trailer:
http://store.debbieford.com/product_info.php?products_id=16
anyway, the decision is yours, just do what you feel is right for you and your relationship. But don’t be afraid to take control of the situation, explore the issue, and do what needs to be done for YOU to be happy.

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my bf stopped watching porn when he got with me, but continued to look at pics. It took a year for me to find out and when I did, wow, it was quite a scene. I’m the kind of person who just simply isn’t comfortable with it. I feel like if he needs to watch that or see those pics hes getting something out of it that he should be getting from me. Which makes me feel inadequate and unwanted. But I also have pretty demanding opinions about sexuality and everything to do with it, comes from being a psych junky I spose. Lets just say I read into every aspect of it, including what it means when it comes to the rest of his thought patterns, the way he looks at other people and the way he looks at sexuality(which I consider very sacred). So I dunno if every woman should take it as hard as I do, but I can’t help how I feel. My man watching porn would make me feel betrayed. And that whole men are sexually weak, they can’t help it, and all that crap, well I have to call BS on that. I think it’s just an excuse for them to not have to step up and grow up. I guess what I’m getting from your question is that it bothers you,and its having a toll on your happiness and self-esteem. To me this says that you need to do something about it, don’t be afraid to ask him to stop, its not too much to ask and it can wonders for your sex life, confidence levels etc. This also means that you would have to stop doing it as well of course, and make a commitment to each other to both stop. One or both of you might fall off the wagon once or even twice, it happens, but just be honest with each other about it and continue moving forward. Two good rules that my bf and I live by in our relationship are: Don’t do anything behind my back that you wouldn’t do in front of me, and don’t get anything outside of our relationship that you should be getting within it. And if you do break the rules, be honest about it, don’t hide it. Thats the key to trust and getting past this issue. I may be going out on a limb here, but just in case you’re interested there’s also a very helpful video by debbie ford called “the shadow effect” which helped me and my bf to understand the issue of porn watching much more deeply, and helped us solve the problem from its very origin. here’s a link to the trailer:
http://store.debbieford.com/product_info.php?products_id=16
anyway, the decision is yours, just do what you feel is right for you and your relationship. But don’t be afraid to take control of the situation, explore the issue, and do what needs to be done for YOU to be happy.

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i watch porn, and i have never been on web cam live chats let alone visited a prostitute! Neither has my partner. For me and my partner it is certainly just an extra……we both find it enjoyable to watch other people but wouldn’t want to actually involve real live other people in our sex lives (lol even if we did would be pretty impossible as parents!). Obviously if it is something he needs rather than just enjoys, or if he wont’ stop when you ask, that’s an issue, but i don’t think porn in itself is always a sign of a problem.

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i watch porn, and i have never been on web cam live chats let alone visited a prostitute! Neither has my partner. For me and my partner it is certainly just an extra……we both find it enjoyable to watch other people but wouldn’t want to actually involve real live other people in our sex lives (lol even if we did would be pretty impossible as parents!). Obviously if it is something he needs rather than just enjoys, or if he wont’ stop when you ask, that’s an issue, but i don’t think porn in itself is always a sign of a problem.

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I’ve been with my husband for 4 years and we are now expecting our second child. When I first got with him and found out he was looking at porn I almost left him..thats how mad/jealous I was. He has continued to do it and now it still bothers me just not as much. I wish he would stop but there is nothing I can do.

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I’ve been with my husband for 4 years and we are now expecting our second child. When I first got with him and found out he was looking at porn I almost left him..thats how mad/jealous I was. He has continued to do it and now it still bothers me just not as much. I wish he would stop but there is nothing I can do.

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i watch porn, so does he (2 kids, 6 yrs later). some people are more sexually open then others and, to be quite frank, you don’t just wake up one morning and watch it, he mustve done it before you met. So, if you didnt get upset then, you have no right to get upset now. He loves you, hes with you, him watching porn has no bearing on that, it won’t make him cheat, it won’t make him stray, any man who DOES and blames the porn would’ve done it porn or no porn, the porn merely becomes to EXCUSE.

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i watch porn, so does he (2 kids, 6 yrs later). some people are more sexually open then others and, to be quite frank, you don’t just wake up one morning and watch it, he mustve done it before you met. So, if you didnt get upset then, you have no right to get upset now. He loves you, hes with you, him watching porn has no bearing on that, it won’t make him cheat, it won’t make him stray, any man who DOES and blames the porn would’ve done it porn or no porn, the porn merely becomes to EXCUSE.

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Also,undoubtedlty, you have insecurities about your post-baby body and bits (I’m a 2x mum, so I know, trust me!!!) and that won’t go away just coz he doesn’t watch porn. It will be something else that makes you paranoid/gets you upset. Your baby is only 3 months old. Everything will fall into place within 4 or 5 months. First 6 months is the hardest with babies.

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Also,undoubtedlty, you have insecurities about your post-baby body and bits (I’m a 2x mum, so I know, trust me!!!) and that won’t go away just coz he doesn’t watch porn. It will be something else that makes you paranoid/gets you upset. Your baby is only 3 months old. Everything will fall into place within 4 or 5 months. First 6 months is the hardest with babies.

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This is totally my OPINION, but i def dont think is appropiate to watch porn in front of your spouse unless is a mutual desire, but the fact that he is doing it and you know it and it bothers you is not right to me, and you have the right to get jealous because is your husband and hes looking at another person, im not too sure about they are not getting pleasure out of it because if that wasnt the case they shoudnt be watching it, it just gives them an idea of what a perfect body looks like and what awesome sex should be, i think that instead of men watching porn they should be trying to experience things on their own. (on the other side again my opinion, but if a guy gets horny from watching that then obviously they are getting something out of it, i would never have sex with a guy who got horny by some tramp and not from me) . I know they want to say men are men and thats what they do, but i think being discreet is very important to the partner that doesnt approve it. My OPINION

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This is totally my OPINION, but i def dont think is appropiate to watch porn in front of your spouse unless is a mutual desire, but the fact that he is doing it and you know it and it bothers you is not right to me, and you have the right to get jealous because is your husband and hes looking at another person, im not too sure about they are not getting pleasure out of it because if that wasnt the case they shoudnt be watching it, it just gives them an idea of what a perfect body looks like and what awesome sex should be, i think that instead of men watching porn they should be trying to experience things on their own. (on the other side again my opinion, but if a guy gets horny from watching that then obviously they are getting something out of it, i would never have sex with a guy who got horny by some tramp and not from me) . I know they want to say men are men and thats what they do, but i think being discreet is very important to the partner that doesnt approve it. My OPINION

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My honest opinion, I would rather my honey enjoy watching porn then experimenting with someone else. We watch porn together as well as on our own free time since we like different things.. I know my man is honest with me about everything including the stuff I would rather not know, he also works all the time and we have different schedules some days. You know for one … everyone enjoys sex and/or pressuring themselves every once in awhile. I would over look it and think about the positives that could come out of it; new positions, if your tired send him to the computer, and more then anything he might like watching something you really don’t like doing and it’s away you can get out of it.

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My honest opinion, I would rather my honey enjoy watching porn then experimenting with someone else. We watch porn together as well as on our own free time since we like different things.. I know my man is honest with me about everything including the stuff I would rather not know, he also works all the time and we have different schedules some days. You know for one … everyone enjoys sex and/or pressuring themselves every once in awhile. I would over look it and think about the positives that could come out of it; new positions, if your tired send him to the computer, and more then anything he might like watching something you really don’t like doing and it’s away you can get out of it.

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For men (and a LOT of women) seeing two people (or more) have sex, is a turn on…doesn’t have to be super beautiful women…it just is. Usually the women in porn are hot…but that doesn’t mean that THAT is what is turning him on. Do yourself a favor….google, “hot naked firemen” lol…check out all the sexy ripped guys on there….then…walk away and tell me if you look at your husband ANY differently!!! It’s not about comparing these people to the one you’re with…you can look at hot guys all day long…nake ones with perfect bodies and big huge you know whats…and you are not going to think any differently of the man you love. We all check out people of the opposite sex…it’s a part of life and it’s in our nature…maybe men a little more than women…as long as you are still turning your husband on and he still wants to have sex with you, it’s perfectly natural for him to watch porn and stuff and it not affect your relationship. Don’t worry…just don’t think about it…of course there is going to be a little jealousy when you dwell on it…just know that your man has probably been watching porn for as long as he’s been able to lol…this is nothing new to him…he loves you, he wants to be with you…if he didn’t, he wouldn’t…simple as that. And when you are feeling man or bitter about it…go check out some hot men lol and you’ll feel better! 🙂 <3 If you ever want to vent you can message me I have been to hell and back dealing with jealousy issues and stuff and I have overcome them by realizing that there is just no room in my life for it...I have a wonderful husband that loves me and cares for me and would never cheat on me who happens to love watching porn 🙂 It's not a big deal...don't make it something it's not.

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For men (and a LOT of women) seeing two people (or more) have sex, is a turn on…doesn’t have to be super beautiful women…it just is. Usually the women in porn are hot…but that doesn’t mean that THAT is what is turning him on. Do yourself a favor….google, “hot naked firemen” lol…check out all the sexy ripped guys on there….then…walk away and tell me if you look at your husband ANY differently!!! It’s not about comparing these people to the one you’re with…you can look at hot guys all day long…nake ones with perfect bodies and big huge you know whats…and you are not going to think any differently of the man you love. We all check out people of the opposite sex…it’s a part of life and it’s in our nature…maybe men a little more than women…as long as you are still turning your husband on and he still wants to have sex with you, it’s perfectly natural for him to watch porn and stuff and it not affect your relationship. Don’t worry…just don’t think about it…of course there is going to be a little jealousy when you dwell on it…just know that your man has probably been watching porn for as long as he’s been able to lol…this is nothing new to him…he loves you, he wants to be with you…if he didn’t, he wouldn’t…simple as that. And when you are feeling man or bitter about it…go check out some hot men lol and you’ll feel better! 🙂 <3 If you ever want to vent you can message me I have been to hell and back dealing with jealousy issues and stuff and I have overcome them by realizing that there is just no room in my life for it...I have a wonderful husband that loves me and cares for me and would never cheat on me who happens to love watching porn 🙂 It's not a big deal...don't make it something it's not.

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Just to add—women have this idea in their heads of what they should look like because of what we are told we should look like….noone is perfect—just because your body isn’t what it used to be…it doesn’t mean you are not sexy. Even for women who are really big…so what? You have girl parts, men have men parts…you put them together and it feels great! Men don’t just need perfect bodies to get excited! As long as your husband can still “get it up” being with you, then you are turning him on just fine and you shouldn’t worry about a thing! You should SEE my stomach! Well my body for that matter—-I am covered ALL OVER with horrible bright red stretch marks, I have a horrible c-section flabby loose skinned belly with layers of fat all around and a ton of cellulite! But so what? I kiss my husband in the right places and touch him the right way and he can’t get enough of me….you are putting way to much pressure on yourself to be perfect and I’ll tell you what—confidence is the sexiest thing to a man…doesn’t matter if you are perfect or not…

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Just to add—women have this idea in their heads of what they should look like because of what we are told we should look like….noone is perfect—just because your body isn’t what it used to be…it doesn’t mean you are not sexy. Even for women who are really big…so what? You have girl parts, men have men parts…you put them together and it feels great! Men don’t just need perfect bodies to get excited! As long as your husband can still “get it up” being with you, then you are turning him on just fine and you shouldn’t worry about a thing! You should SEE my stomach! Well my body for that matter—-I am covered ALL OVER with horrible bright red stretch marks, I have a horrible c-section flabby loose skinned belly with layers of fat all around and a ton of cellulite! But so what? I kiss my husband in the right places and touch him the right way and he can’t get enough of me….you are putting way to much pressure on yourself to be perfect and I’ll tell you what—confidence is the sexiest thing to a man…doesn’t matter if you are perfect or not…

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and for the record—I watch and love porn…into completely different porn than my husband (I prefer more soft core stuff)…but I love it…and it HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM—some people bothered me with their comments because I’m a WOMAN who enjoys watching porn and the feeling of “taking care of it on your own” is COMPLETELY different than having sex….I can have sex every day for a week and then still feel the urge to do it by myself for the night…not because I’m not satisfied, just because it’s a personal feeling that I enjoy and I love it…also, it doesn’t make me want my husband any less…I can watch porn and have sex in the same day, the two are not related. It’s not personal….people that disagree with this are either 1. people who do not watch porn or masterbate and therefor do not understand at all or 2. people who are in or have been in bad relationships or suffering ones where the men WOULD resort to porn because they were not intimate with their wives for one reason or another…but that’s not the norm…most people just watch porn because it turns them on that that’s that…nothing personal…sorry for all the rants but I just want you to feel better about it

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and for the record—I watch and love porn…into completely different porn than my husband (I prefer more soft core stuff)…but I love it…and it HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH HIM—some people bothered me with their comments because I’m a WOMAN who enjoys watching porn and the feeling of “taking care of it on your own” is COMPLETELY different than having sex….I can have sex every day for a week and then still feel the urge to do it by myself for the night…not because I’m not satisfied, just because it’s a personal feeling that I enjoy and I love it…also, it doesn’t make me want my husband any less…I can watch porn and have sex in the same day, the two are not related. It’s not personal….people that disagree with this are either 1. people who do not watch porn or masterbate and therefor do not understand at all or 2. people who are in or have been in bad relationships or suffering ones where the men WOULD resort to porn because they were not intimate with their wives for one reason or another…but that’s not the norm…most people just watch porn because it turns them on that that’s that…nothing personal…sorry for all the rants but I just want you to feel better about it

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i dont agree with ANYONE watching porn if they are in a relationship. sorry, but I find it disgusting. If a person is totally happy with their partner, why the heck do they need to look at other peoples genitals? Its WRONG.

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i dont agree with ANYONE watching porn if they are in a relationship. sorry, but I find it disgusting. If a person is totally happy with their partner, why the heck do they need to look at other peoples genitals? Its WRONG.

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For the while thing that men are men and that’s just what they do. I’ve had slot of boyfriends who have used that excuse, and my husband now doesn’t watch not have any interest in porn. He’s very monogamous, and I’m very grateful for that, because I would personally feel inadequate too. Try explaining and talking to him about it. or maybe get a but daring in the bedroom, spice it up try to do something intimate every night, suprise him, be sexy and feel sexy. It’s sure to get his attention and add a spark to your love life and keep your marriage alive.

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For the while thing that men are men and that’s just what they do. I’ve had slot of boyfriends who have used that excuse, and my husband now doesn’t watch not have any interest in porn. He’s very monogamous, and I’m very grateful for that, because I would personally feel inadequate too. Try explaining and talking to him about it. or maybe get a but daring in the bedroom, spice it up try to do something intimate every night, suprise him, be sexy and feel sexy. It’s sure to get his attention and add a spark to your love life and keep your marriage alive.

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sorry if tmi I just think that if anyone in a marriage has the urge to have an orgasm and their partner isn’t in the mood, or is tired then it’s still totally acceptable to have that orgasm and to enjoy a sexual thrill from it. I found out that my husband would sneak off to the bathroom in the night if I fallen asleep and be embarrassed about it. I was like, you wally you have needs too don’t feel ashamed! If your partner has a sexual need and you aren’t in the mood then it’s really unfair to curb it. If you are in the mood then it should be together, but if you aren’t then you can’t expect them to dance to your tune. Watching a bit of porn just helps get the juices flowing quicker. As soon as he’s finished he’d turn it straight off |I imagine. If it’s the focus of his sexuality then that’s a problem, if it isn’t then stop stressing out.

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sorry if tmi I just think that if anyone in a marriage has the urge to have an orgasm and their partner isn’t in the mood, or is tired then it’s still totally acceptable to have that orgasm and to enjoy a sexual thrill from it. I found out that my husband would sneak off to the bathroom in the night if I fallen asleep and be embarrassed about it. I was like, you wally you have needs too don’t feel ashamed! If your partner has a sexual need and you aren’t in the mood then it’s really unfair to curb it. If you are in the mood then it should be together, but if you aren’t then you can’t expect them to dance to your tune. Watching a bit of porn just helps get the juices flowing quicker. As soon as he’s finished he’d turn it straight off |I imagine. If it’s the focus of his sexuality then that’s a problem, if it isn’t then stop stressing out.

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Porn will take you further than you want to go. The very words of Jesus are that He who looks after a woman to lust after her has commited adultery with her already in his heart. It is not right, even if it is “normal”.

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Porn will take you further than you want to go. The very words of Jesus are that He who looks after a woman to lust after her has commited adultery with her already in his heart. It is not right, even if it is “normal”.

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There are 2 debates here, Porn and Body image. I understand how 1 can affect the other, as u feel less confident in ur own skin it plays on ur insecurities of ur relationship. Personally I am ok with porn, I love my body, and I know my husband does. We have a healthy sex life and totally trust each other. I think if I wasn’t so confident, porn may affect me as I wud feel I was failing my husband so I would work on changing my body (hitting the gym) and mind (i mean how amazing is ur body to produce a baby) as this would increase ur confidence, therefore reduce ur insecurities???? I do think a women’s body is amazing- and I think positive mental attitude helps, I think it just takes time for u to adapt to ur body’s changes, but u will get there.

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There are 2 debates here, Porn and Body image. I understand how 1 can affect the other, as u feel less confident in ur own skin it plays on ur insecurities of ur relationship. Personally I am ok with porn, I love my body, and I know my husband does. We have a healthy sex life and totally trust each other. I think if I wasn’t so confident, porn may affect me as I wud feel I was failing my husband so I would work on changing my body (hitting the gym) and mind (i mean how amazing is ur body to produce a baby) as this would increase ur confidence, therefore reduce ur insecurities???? I do think a women’s body is amazing- and I think positive mental attitude helps, I think it just takes time for u to adapt to ur body’s changes, but u will get there.

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lol…this is not a debate on whether or not porn is acceptable…answer the question asked or skip it….lol at the monogamous statement…just because people watch porn, doesn’t mean people are going to be with other men or women! I assure you.., my husband and I BOTH watch porn and are completely monogamous as well! ANywho, again, not an arguement, any man that says he doesn’t watch porn is probably lying lol…but whatever helps you sleep at night. Ashley—I am scared of an arguement so if you have anything to say to me please private message me I don’t want to come back to this question and get annoyed :/

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lol…this is not a debate on whether or not porn is acceptable…answer the question asked or skip it….lol at the monogamous statement…just because people watch porn, doesn’t mean people are going to be with other men or women! I assure you.., my husband and I BOTH watch porn and are completely monogamous as well! ANywho, again, not an arguement, any man that says he doesn’t watch porn is probably lying lol…but whatever helps you sleep at night. Ashley—I am scared of an arguement so if you have anything to say to me please private message me I don’t want to come back to this question and get annoyed :/

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you should not lose confidence. boys will be boys. he’s certainly not watching porn because of you and your body. its easier! he doesn’t have to please anyone but himself in that moment! every womans body changes after a baby. My personal story – I was about 30 lbs over weight when i got pregnant with my son, now i’m 100 lbs over weight and about in a month I will be having bybass surgery. FOR MYSELF, not for my bf. (he actually doesn’t see anything wrong with me). you shouldn’t feel jealous or inadequate that he’s taking fast food over a gormet meal sometimes, we all do!
i definitely agree with some of these other moms. do things that will make YOU feel better about YOU. Go the gym …buy sexy things (when you’re ready)….buy clothes that compliment the body you have now. you will start feel better about yourself and it read across to everyone, expecially him, and that could become sexier to him than porn!

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you should not lose confidence. boys will be boys. he’s certainly not watching porn because of you and your body. its easier! he doesn’t have to please anyone but himself in that moment! every womans body changes after a baby. My personal story – I was about 30 lbs over weight when i got pregnant with my son, now i’m 100 lbs over weight and about in a month I will be having bybass surgery. FOR MYSELF, not for my bf. (he actually doesn’t see anything wrong with me). you shouldn’t feel jealous or inadequate that he’s taking fast food over a gormet meal sometimes, we all do!
i definitely agree with some of these other moms. do things that will make YOU feel better about YOU. Go the gym …buy sexy things (when you’re ready)….buy clothes that compliment the body you have now. you will start feel better about yourself and it read across to everyone, expecially him, and that could become sexier to him than porn!

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Porn stars arent attractive either, seriously, don’t get jealous/upset. Life’s too short. Men are visual, women not so much. Do you ever catch your man trying to watch himself slide in and out of you??? Just an example. Trust me. It really isn’t a big deal. Please give yourself a break. You are beautiful, and he thinks so too. =) Talk to him though. Let HIM reassure you!

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Porn stars arent attractive either, seriously, don’t get jealous/upset. Life’s too short. Men are visual, women not so much. Do you ever catch your man trying to watch himself slide in and out of you??? Just an example. Trust me. It really isn’t a big deal. Please give yourself a break. You are beautiful, and he thinks so too. =) Talk to him though. Let HIM reassure you!

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yayfornumber2 <<< I can assure you darl, my hubby DIOES NOT watch porn and he is no liar thank you. Neither of us have watched porn (or feel the need to) since we've been in a relationship. We have a VERY active sex life and love to explore eachother. Why the heck would ANYONE want to go off and have a wank (sorry) over a fake person/book/magazine when they have their partner to give lovin too? If the woman is tired and the man is in the "mood" then if he loved her & respected her, he'd understand that and just hold off until they were BOTH ready. I guess my hubby & I are just lucky to have that very active sex life and we love eachothers bodies. And have no need to go and look at filth 🙂

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yayfornumber2 <<< I can assure you darl, my hubby DIOES NOT watch porn and he is no liar thank you. Neither of us have watched porn (or feel the need to) since we've been in a relationship. We have a VERY active sex life and love to explore eachother. Why the heck would ANYONE want to go off and have a wank (sorry) over a fake person/book/magazine when they have their partner to give lovin too? If the woman is tired and the man is in the "mood" then if he loved her & respected her, he'd understand that and just hold off until they were BOTH ready. I guess my hubby & I are just lucky to have that very active sex life and we love eachothers bodies. And have no need to go and look at filth 🙂

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weber3 <<< well said and I agree 100%

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weber3 <<< well said and I agree 100%

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Just for the fun of it and out of curiousity i have 2 brother, who one is 17 and the other is 23 both in a relationship, and their answer to watching porn was, if you are turned on by your partner then their is no need to watch it and mostly in front of them. They both said is respect to their partners and not because they are punks or dont like it, is just very disrespectful, funny how they want to say men or men and thats what they do and 2 young men said other wise, to me i agree with weber3 also, porn was not intended by God and if thats so then is wrong, everyone has their own opinion, all i got to say is NEVER say NEVER, seen to many girls bet on their husband/boyfriend being faithful and those have been the firsts ones to have a double life.

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Just for the fun of it and out of curiousity i have 2 brother, who one is 17 and the other is 23 both in a relationship, and their answer to watching porn was, if you are turned on by your partner then their is no need to watch it and mostly in front of them. They both said is respect to their partners and not because they are punks or dont like it, is just very disrespectful, funny how they want to say men or men and thats what they do and 2 young men said other wise, to me i agree with weber3 also, porn was not intended by God and if thats so then is wrong, everyone has their own opinion, all i got to say is NEVER say NEVER, seen to many girls bet on their husband/boyfriend being faithful and those have been the firsts ones to have a double life.

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I have no problems with porn and my hubby only watches it with me becasue I find it a turn on as well. I’ve had cancer, both my breasts removed, a giant scar on my belly from having a DIEP (google it if you want to know what it is) and so I have had a pretty poor body image before I got boobs back but never felt inadequete because of the porn ladies. We only watch it a few times a year when the mood strikes us. We are very committeed to each other and have been for 8yrs

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I have no problems with porn and my hubby only watches it with me becasue I find it a turn on as well. I’ve had cancer, both my breasts removed, a giant scar on my belly from having a DIEP (google it if you want to know what it is) and so I have had a pretty poor body image before I got boobs back but never felt inadequete because of the porn ladies. We only watch it a few times a year when the mood strikes us. We are very committeed to each other and have been for 8yrs

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Thank you ladies for all your feedback!!

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Thank you ladies for all your feedback!!